Would you let your teen go to the beach with another family?

[Anonymous]

Just my kid yes. We’ve taken friends to ghe beach. A group like that, no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many friends?

OP here. It seems like each kid is inviting about 4 friends. So 8 in total. But DD also said there might be cousins. Not sure about that one. Basically a lot of kids!!!

No. If the son was inviting one friend, I’d be fine with it. But 4 each plus cousins? What in the world? How big is this house? Seems like a lot of shared space and likely little adult oversight

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, a parent willing to take all those people to the beach is not planning to supervise much if at all. You can tell by the number of kids the parent is allowing to go. I'd frankly be more worried about riptides and drownings.

This. +1000

[Anonymous]

Not unless I knew the other parents well and knew the older brother and his friends. I can envision a situation where I had this kind of relationship with another family, but it doesn't sound like you do.

[Anonymous]

I would say no. They’re going to be drinking and smoking out.

[Anonymous]

It is not the topic of this post, but why would any parents want to do this? Host 8+ teens? Actual nightmare if you are going to take any responsibility for them so that tells you everything you need to know OP about how they plan to handle the situation.

[Anonymous]

If I knew the parents really well I would (I can picture 3-4 families where this is the case). But with this many kids invited, it could be a friend that isn't quite as close and I wouldn't feel comfortable if I was only on acquaintance-basis with the parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is not the topic of this post, but why would any parents want to do this? Host 8+ teens? Actual nightmare if you are going to take any responsibility for them so that tells you everything you need to know OP about how they plan to handle the situation.

Because they’re rich and want to be the cool parents. The parents will probably be getting hammered every night while the kids are left to entertain themselves…however they see fit.

[Anonymous]

It depends. I would want to talk to the parents. I might let my 13 year old DD go, but she is not the type to flirt or want to hang out with boys and she makes good decisions. She has an older brother who is a very typical teen boy and she knows what teenage boys are about.

My cousin, when she was 13 years old, was boy-crazy and absolutely would have become involved in shenanigans even if no boy initiated. So if I had a kid like that, no way.

I think boys are more likely than girls to get themselves in dangerous situations re: the water. Girls tend to lay lower and stay in groups at the beach.

[Anonymous]

OP here.
Like I said, we are normally very comfortable with this family/older son. We just aren't clear on the friends, who they are and what the typical day/sleeping arrangements look like and who the cousins are (if they are even going or how old they are). DD and her friend are typically good 14yr olds-- minimal drama, into boys but not advanced for their age, follow rules and directions etc. I don't know the other girls but DD says they're part of the 'friend group' so I would assume they're similar.

[Anonymous]

I would say yes if it was just going to be your kid, but honestly I would doubt the judgement of the parents for thinking this is OK and that alone would make this a hard pass. Try to come up with another fun thing for your kid to do to make up for it. Maybe take her and a friend to an amusement park for a day or something like that.

[Anonymous]

As a parent, I can't imagine any scenario where I would want to be responsible for feeding and entertaining that many teens, much less take on the responsibility of a mixed gender group, unless I was trying to be the cool parent, like a PP mentioned. It would definitely give me pause too and I would want to talk with the parents first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I knew the parents really well I would (I can picture 3-4 families where this is the case). But with this many kids invited, it could be a friend that isn't quite as close and I wouldn't feel comfortable if I was only on acquaintance-basis with the parents.

+1. It could be a lot of fun, but also can see how it could get out of hand easily.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a parent, I can't imagine any scenario where I would want to be responsible for feeding and entertaining that many teens, much less take on the responsibility of a mixed gender group, unless I was trying to be the cool parent, like a PP mentioned. It would definitely give me pause too and I would want to talk with the parents first.

Just be aware though talking to the parents can be misleading or at a minimum, is not really enough information about how people actually behave. The type that doesn't supervise doesn't say this. Yes, we'll be there the whole time supervising the kids. We will make sure they don't drink (how exactly?) and are home by 10pm every night.

Meanwhile, they are drunk or partying themselves and not paying any attention.

Been there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here.
Like I said, we are normally very comfortable with this family/older son. We just aren't clear on the friends, who they are and what the typical day/sleeping arrangements look like and who the cousins are (if they are even going or how old they are). DD and her friend are typically good 14yr olds-- minimal drama, into boys but not advanced for their age, follow rules and directions etc. I don't know the other girls but DD says they're part of the 'friend group' so I would assume they're similar.

Go with your gut and do what makes you comfortable. I’ve said no and yes to my kids staying with certain families. It completely depends on the kids. Sometimes the older sibling has been more on the wild side and I was worried trouble could happen. I’m not taking any chances.

In our house, my older teen boy is a big introvert who loves his computer and isn’t into to partying at all. When he has friends over, they play computer games, eat or talk about cars. They do not pay any attention to his younger sister or her friends if they are here. The only exception is if they girls are loud and they ask one of us to tell them to be quieter. If the older kids are like this, sure, let them go. Most likely they aren’t and do what makes you comfortable.