Why are people so judgy and easily offended now?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:because they are liberals who want to be offended any way they can. And criticize while they are at it!

This. And it’s the millennials. Gen X isn’t so prickly.

I'm a millenial at 42 and grew up when people weren't sheep or easily offended which more than I can say for the libs or gene. Latinx lmao. Traveling to Texas is a relief.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People are very sensitive to word choices and what they mean/imply. If you are describing a woman - say "woman," if you "have a wife" say you are "married" or have a "partner."

None of the examples that OP listed are offensive in any way. There is nothing wrong with those word choices - those who are offended by them would have been offended by something else. It doesn't matter to them, they are just offended.

I don't think these comments belong in a group together, except a group of annoying interactions OP recently had. Too specific to him. They don't really represent the same stuff at all.

I wouldn't offended by someone saying "female" which is just a word, but I am aware from following news about misogynist groups on sites like 4chan (the self-named "incels") that they use the word female instead of woman and that the usage has become pervasive enough that some people associate it with them. I wouldn't assume someone who used it was an incel, but I might let someone I'm close to know of that association. That's not about people being oversensitive, it's about a fringe group adopting a certain term and changing its connotation due to their association. Incels are highly misogynist and sometimes scary, so personally I'd avoid using language that made me sound like one. But I wouldn't be offended by the word female.

I might note if someone used the word "female" but then referred to men as... men. I would wonder why the difference. So, something to consider.

Meanwhile anyone taking issue with "have a wife" is being overly critical or sensitive. The only person who should be weighing in on that phrasing would be OP's wife. I don't see why anyone else would care. My MIL still goes as "Mrs. FIL" in many settings because she wants to. My FIL would say "has a wife." While that's not how I would speak about my own relationship, I have zero problems with them saying it because it's their life and their relationship. Whoever was criticizing OP for this should mind their own business.

And the last example is OP being obnoxious. Yes, it is rude to tell someone who has expressed an interest in a certain field, "you know that field doesn't pay well." Because (1) I am 100% certain the person in question is aware the arts don't pay as well as, say, finance or medicine; and (2) it's judgmental and no one was asking for OP's position. There's no difference between this and telling a law student "you know lawyers get divorced at a higher rate." It doesn't matter if it's true. This is as situation where OP needs to mind his own business. Don't offer your opinion or insight into someone's chosen profession unless they ask. Also don't comment on someone's weight, and no one cares what you think of their hairstyle unless you love it. These are highly personal things and no one wants to litigate them in polite conversation.

You don't read much genre fiction, I guess? It's low-brow, sure. But there's no harm in light escapist fiction.

[Anonymous]

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.dallasnews.com/opinion/commentary/2022/04/28/latinx-not-in-texas-we-are-hispanics-and-latinos/%3foutputType=amp

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:because they are liberals who want to be offended any way they can. And criticize while they are at it!

This. And it’s the millennials. Gen X isn’t so prickly.

You're showing your age. It's not Millennials, they're middle-aged now. It's Gen Zers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:because they are liberals who want to be offended any way they can. And criticize while they are at it!

This. And it’s the millennials. Gen X isn’t so prickly.

You're showing your age. It's not Millennials, they're middle-aged now. It's Gen Zers.

Yep. Millenials are and always will be the best. Sorry I mean those millenials over age 35.

[Anonymous]

If they correct innocuous phrases enough, older writing will look ancient.

They want this. They want to forget history.

I’m not saying everybody who corrects phrases, I’m saying some people. (Younger academics)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People are very sensitive to word choices and what they mean/imply. If you are describing a woman - say "woman," if you "have a wife" say you are "married" or have a "partner."

None of the examples that OP listed are offensive in any way. There is nothing wrong with those word choices - those who are offended by them would have been offended by something else. It doesn't matter to them, they are just offended.

I don't think these comments belong in a group together, except a group of annoying interactions OP recently had. Too specific to him. They don't really represent the same stuff at all.

I wouldn't offended by someone saying "female" which is just a word, but I am aware from following news about misogynist groups on sites like 4chan (the self-named "incels") that they use the word female instead of woman and that the usage has become pervasive enough that some people associate it with them. I wouldn't assume someone who used it was an incel, but I might let someone I'm close to know of that association. That's not about people being oversensitive, it's about a fringe group adopting a certain term and changing its connotation due to their association. Incels are highly misogynist and sometimes scary, so personally I'd avoid using language that made me sound like one. But I wouldn't be offended by the word female.

I might note if someone used the word "female" but then referred to men as... men. I would wonder why the difference. So, something to consider.

Meanwhile anyone taking issue with "have a wife" is being overly critical or sensitive. The only person who should be weighing in on that phrasing would be OP's wife. I don't see why anyone else would care. My MIL still goes as "Mrs. FIL" in many settings because she wants to. My FIL would say "has a wife." While that's not how I would speak about my own relationship, I have zero problems with them saying it because it's their life and their relationship. Whoever was criticizing OP for this should mind their own business.

And the last example is OP being obnoxious. Yes, it is rude to tell someone who has expressed an interest in a certain field, "you know that field doesn't pay well." Because (1) I am 100% certain the person in question is aware the arts don't pay as well as, say, finance or medicine; and (2) it's judgmental and no one was asking for OP's position. There's no difference between this and telling a law student "you know lawyers get divorced at a higher rate." It doesn't matter if it's true. This is as situation where OP needs to mind his own business. Don't offer your opinion or insight into someone's chosen profession unless they ask. Also don't comment on someone's weight, and no one cares what you think of their hairstyle unless you love it. These are highly personal things and no one wants to litigate them in polite conversation.

OP here, in the specific context where I mentioned art doesn’t pay well, I was doing so in response to them being surprised at being given a very low job offer. They were expecting literally 2-3x the offered salary for an entry level art position which seemed a bit naive to me. It’s not like I blurted it out randomly. Context is everything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People are very sensitive to word choices and what they mean/imply. If you are describing a woman - say "woman," if you "have a wife" say you are "married" or have a "partner."

Yes, but why are things different now? What caused the shift? Do you think it’s a good or bad thing? I feel like in 10-20 years the language that 25 year olds feel is acceptable now will be considered offensive in some other way.

It's always been weird to refer to women as "females", especially when people never refer to men as "males" or say something like "men and females" in a sentence. I remember people being irked by this in the 90s.

[Anonymous]

We were all self-righteous, smug jerks to some extent in our younger years, but it was on a microlevel. I think social media has made it so much worse. It introduces people to concepts or things that they should now be offended about (whether valid or not), and it reinforces that belief by filling your feed with others who believe the exact same thing. And it gives people a platform to "speak their truth" as if every opinion or thought that crosses your mind is worthy of being shared and must be heard and acknowledged.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because Americans have a good life so they start creating problems out of nowhere
Signed, immigrant.

I completely agree.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like you are the sensitive one who took offense. These people are just voicing their opinions. Everyone has an opinion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because Americans have a good life so they start creating problems out of nowhere
Signed, immigrant.

Agree with this. The wife example is the worst one.

[Anonymous]

Just keep saying whatever you want, in 10 more years you’ll be old enough to not GAF what other people think.

[Anonymous]

Our society is very self-centered. It all about the self: identity, feelings, social media. People navel gaze and rarely think of others except on how others think or act towards them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because Americans have a good life so they start creating problems out of nowhere
Signed, immigrant.

I completely agree.

Another agree!