Holiday cards are the worst

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People say it a lot, but OP needs therapy to reverse her destructive worldview.

I don’t think so. It’s a natural human to her current situation.

[Anonymous]

its just a picture, you wouldn't know how f'd up our kids and family are but at least it make us feel good about ourselves lol

[Anonymous]

I am really sorry, OP. The holidays can be a hard time for a ton of reasons and I remember very well when infertility was one for me. Wishing you the very best on your journey.

[Anonymous]

Not all families are the same OP. Our daughter is adopted and is a different race. I didn’t begrudge my friends having their biological children when we didn’t.
Your life is what you make it.
Put the cards up or don’t. Big it’s not worth crying over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t open them and don’t display them.

Best wishes!

This is good advice OP. Or if you want to display some, maybe your partner could open them and look for any non photo cards to display (we always get some of those and they are quite lovely)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry OP. You have the permission from an internet stranger to not hang them on your fridge, not open them on tough days, etc. that would be very painful for anyone in your shoes.

Agree. Just trash them OP. If looking at them is hurting you, do not hang them on your fridge!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not all families are the same OP. Our daughter is adopted and is a different race. I didn’t begrudge my friends having their biological children when we didn’t.
Your life is what you make it.
Put the cards up or don’t. Big it’s not worth crying over.

To you. To OP, it is.

[Anonymous]

Recycle those puppies, without a second thought.

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry OP. I have been where you are. It's hard and people who did not struggle to have kids don't get it.

Don't even open cards this year. I think it's important to power through and keep showing up in real life situations even when it's hard (show happiness if a friend announces pregnancy and okay maybe go home and cry later, go to baby shower for close friend). But this small stuff in the privacy of your own home? Take a pass and reserve your energy for the bigger things.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Op don’t feel bad about tossing them straight into the bin. I never understand the point of holiday cards with photo shoots. They annoy me before and after I had kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not all families are the same OP. Our daughter is adopted and is a different race. I didn’t begrudge my friends having their biological children when we didn’t.
Your life is what you make it.
Put the cards up or don’t. Big it’s not worth crying over.

Not all people are the same PP. The OP did not say she begrudges friends having biological children. The pictures are reminders of what she wants and is struggling to have and realizes she might never get. For some people, this is a lot to process and they process by crying.

[Anonymous]

Don't open the cards if it feels like a photo card. Just put them straight in the trash. I would not judge you one bit if that helps you not be triggered.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There they hang on my fridge with pictures of proud families showing off their cubs. It’s like each of their picture-perfect existence is taunting me and saying, “ look we are better than you! We procreated!”

I received a fresh batch today and feel like crying.

You do know that’s not at all what is being conveyed, right?

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry OP.

With the exception of a couple relatives, we don't even display these types of cards, I just put them in a pile under the mail. It's hard when you are struggling to have one baby to stare at all these big families.

[Anonymous]

And, I have found that bragging about their family is exactly what is being done by many of these people. Not all of course (my relatives for example) but the photos of everyone on the beach in swimsuits or on a cruise or on their expensive vacation is a definite flex of some kind.