Coach doesn’t like my child

[Anonymous]

I called the club and requested that another coach go to a few practices and let me know what my child was doing that was making the coach so mad.

The club agreed and they said “nothing”, they talked to the coach and the coach did not change.

We were stuck for a while and it sucked but we could just counsel him on how to deal with a crazy coach.

After one game a coach from the other team walked up my coach and told him the way he treated my child was an embarrassment.

It was wild. My child went on to play college and at the end of his time with the coach they told him off.

[Anonymous]

We had a coach tell us that he yells at the kids he thinks have potential and the minute he stops yelling at your kid it means he thinks they have peaked. Could it be the coach doesn’t see a reason to invest in your kid? Not saying it’s right, just wondering if the coach thinks your kid isn’t worth his time. If so, move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As I see it there are three issues here:

1) Coach doesn't like your kid as much as the others.
2) Coach doesn't praise the kid when they play well.
3) Coach doesn't give the kid feedback on how to improve.


1...there isn't much you can do about this. The reality is that people always will like some more than others.

2...this isn't really worth worrying about either. And not much you can do


3...this is where she should take action. She deserves actionable feedback from her coach on how to improve her play. Have her approach the coach and ask for feedback. But only do this if she is prepared to listen non-defensively to the feedback and try to improve.

What happens if your kid plays the same position as the coach's kid? It's happened twice to my kid and that was the situation both times. If you just stuck getting minimal playing time because the coach's kid is obviously a star, you just have to grin and bear it

You may still get less playing time and may want to consider switching teams, but that doesn't mean you can't get feedback on what you need to do to improve based on the limited playing time and practice performance.

That doesn't work for leagues where players are allocated based on geography. You're also assuming that my kid cares what the coach says. When a kid sees that they are being treated unfairly, they are not going to listen to criticism, constructive or otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for all of the advice. We will move when we are able to. I’m disappointed that I wasted time and money in a program that doesn’t provide any feedback.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for all of the advice. We will move when we are able to. I’m disappointed that I wasted time and money in a program that doesn’t provide any feedback.

I think you are just upset because he doesn't notice your special child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for all of the advice. We will move when we are able to. I’m disappointed that I wasted time and money in a program that doesn’t provide any feedback.

I think you are just upset because he doesn't notice your special child.

NP here. This was an unkind thing to say.

My child has a coach who provides really detailed, constructive, and actionable feedback, particularly at the end of the season, but he’s happy to discuss with the players and parents at any time.

I have friends whose coaches provide little to no details and it’s very frustrating to the families/kids to know what they need to work on. The threat of being cut always hangs over their heads each season and it’s difficult to know they could be cut without knowing why or having been given the chance to improve.

Good coach feedback is invaluable.

[Anonymous]

Is your kid a good teammate? Do they show up to all trainings and give maximum effort? Do they play their position correctly when on the field (in the pool, court, diamond, whatever sport we are talking about)?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for all of the advice. We will move when we are able to. I’m disappointed that I wasted time and money in a program that doesn’t provide any feedback.

I think you are just upset because he doesn't notice your special child.

Why don’t you climb back under your miserable rock.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It has become very obvious and I don’t know why. Other coaches at practices will tell DD that she played well but the head coach never does. DD is a solid player and a very nice kid. Is there a way to bring this up with the coach? Or should I just accept that the coach has a problem with my kid and move on to another team when we are able to do so. I would love to hear about similar situations that others have experienced.

OP is the coach a volunteer? Does coach every tell the team they played well? How often does DD need validation or is it you who needs it? Objectively, does your DD play well for what her role is? Is your DD content where she is and still happy to go to practices and games? Does DD get ample playing time? If so, does she play more than half the games?

Is this sport a multi-season sport or a 1x season sport?

[Anonymous]

I have three kids who play sports and I honestly don’t understand what the problem is here. What type of feedback are you expecting, exactly? Why are you assuming the coach dislikes your child? Is there an issue with playing time?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for all of the advice. We will move when we are able to. I’m disappointed that I wasted time and money in a program that doesn’t provide any feedback.

I think you are just upset because he doesn't notice your special child.

Are you always such a dick?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for all of the advice. We will move when we are able to. I’m disappointed that I wasted time and money in a program that doesn’t provide any feedback.

I think you are just upset because he doesn't notice your special child.

Are you always such a dick?

They and their kid is last picked and it still hurts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for all of the advice. We will move when we are able to. I’m disappointed that I wasted time and money in a program that doesn’t provide any feedback.

I think you are just upset because he doesn't notice your special child.

Are you always such a dick?

No one is the villain in their own story, especially a story about their kid. I find it pretty had to believe the OPs kid has never recieved any feedback from the HC. Maybe it isn't to the level OP wants because it does seem fro.hiw OPs posts are OP is looking for constant validation.

Or maybe OPs kid doesn't listen to the feedback given and the coach is done trying to provide it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It has become very obvious and I don’t know why. Other coaches at practices will tell DD that she played well but the head coach never does. DD is a solid player and a very nice kid. Is there a way to bring this up with the coach? Or should I just accept that the coach has a problem with my kid and move on to another team when we are able to do so. I would love to hear about similar situations that others have experienced.

OP is the coach a volunteer? Does coach every tell the team they played well? How often does DD need validation or is it you who needs it? Objectively, does your DD play well for what her role is? Is your DD content where she is and still happy to go to practices and games? Does DD get ample playing time? If so, does she play more than half the games?

Is this sport a multi-season sport or a 1x season sport?

These are all fair questions. My kids have played a lot of sports, and there are always "favorites." Answering these questions will help you know whether he really doesn't LIKE your child, or if you're just not getting the feedback you want.

Also -- has your child asked for feedback? They're old enough to say, "Coach, what would you like me to work on?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for all of the advice. We will move when we are able to. I’m disappointed that I wasted time and money in a program that doesn’t provide any feedback.

I think you are just upset because he doesn't notice your special child.

Are you always such a dick?

No one is the villain in their own story, especially a story about their kid. I find it pretty had to believe the OPs kid has never recieved any feedback from the HC. Maybe it isn't to the level OP wants because it does seem fro.hiw OPs posts are OP is looking for constant validation.

Or maybe OPs kid doesn't listen to the feedback given and the coach is done trying to provide it.

I’m sorry for whoever hurt you.