Wish I'd had another kid regret?

[Anonymous]

I’m in my 50’s and that regret and longing for another child has never disappeared. Of course I had to accept it wasn’t to be, but I do wish we could have had one more.

[Anonymous]

I deeply regret having kids at all. At least you don’t feel like that?

[Anonymous]

Multiple kids with ADHD is rough, ask me how I know.

[Anonymous]

I had this feeling for a few years but my two girls are 12 and 15 now and they are wonderful but still require a lot of my emotional energy. There are still moments even now where I’m not sure where I’d find the energy to deal with a third human. So I’m glad we stopped. And it allows us to pay for more things for them since we don’t have unlimited funds.

[Anonymous]

I used to feel that way (I'm 43)...but it gets less and less as time goes by. I think things have become a bit more demanding as they've got older. I put my focus on all the pluses of having 2. I do sometimes get pangs of remorse or sadness, but it passes because I know it's more based on fantasy instead of the logical reality. Two is best for our family, regardless of what I might have wanted.

[Anonymous]

I got pregnant unexpectedly at 46 when I had two grown kids already. It is definitely harder to behaving a third child in your late forties. I am still enjoying it very much and so glad our little bundle of joy came along.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have this regret about not having a third (am now 45).
It would have killed my career esp during covid, plus one of my kids (they are 7 and 9) has adhd and needs extra attn. BUT I still find myself thinking about this every day. Anyone else in the same boat? How do I get past this feeling? URGH.

These are the easy years - remember what little kids are actually like and you’ll remember why you made this choice. Plus, think of all the fun stuff you can do without a baby holding you back!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have this regret about not having a third (am now 45).
It would have killed my career esp during covid, plus one of my kids (they are 7 and 9) has adhd and needs extra attn. BUT I still find myself thinking about this every day. Anyone else in the same boat? How do I get past this feeling? URGH.

No. I'm very thankful for not having another one. I love my kids but having kids gives lot of stress and drains lot of money. We are donut hole family so literally spent a fortune on colleges.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have this regret about not having a third (am now 45).
It would have killed my career esp during covid, plus one of my kids (they are 7 and 9) has adhd and needs extra attn. BUT I still find myself thinking about this every day. Anyone else in the same boat? How do I get past this feeling? URGH.

You are lucky, count your blessings.

[Anonymous]

I’m 46 and kids are 20 and 16. We’ve gotten pets and that scratches the itch.

[Anonymous]

We had secondary infertility and never had a second. There’s no magic solution, OP. You have to intentionally replace the sad feelings with being grateful for what you have and focusing on the benefits of your current family size.

[Anonymous]

Have another kid.

[Anonymous]

You have two great kids. Be thankful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have this regret about not having a third (am now 45).
It would have killed my career esp during covid, plus one of my kids (they are 7 and 9) has adhd and needs extra attn. BUT I still find myself thinking about this every day. Anyone else in the same boat? How do I get past this feeling? URGH.

No. I'm very thankful for not having another one. I love my kids but having kids gives lot of stress and drains lot of money. We are donut hole family so literally spent a fortune on colleges.

You aren't a donut hole family. You are a comfortable family who choose expensive schools for your kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have this regret about not having a third (am now 45).
It would have killed my career esp during covid, plus one of my kids (they are 7 and 9) has adhd and needs extra attn. BUT I still find myself thinking about this every day. Anyone else in the same boat? How do I get past this feeling? URGH.

No. I'm very thankful for not having another one. I love my kids but having kids gives lot of stress and drains lot of money. We are donut hole family so literally spent a fortune on colleges.

You aren't a donut hole family. You are a comfortable family who choose expensive schools for your kids.

Pardon my ignorance but what is a donut hole family?