What does this behavior sound like??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another perspective on therapy... I would put her back into therapy. I would tell the therapist the exact lies that she's telling and see if that can be addressed in therapy. There are going to be a lot of boring, no progress sessions. But the child should know that her BS is being called out. No one believes the lies. She should not discontinue therapy until/unless she starts being real.

I would tell her that she doesn't have to talk to you, but she has to talk to someone. She doesn't have to like that therapist... but she has to continue with someone.

I'm sorry but it sounds like your child is in crisis and is lashing out in destructive ways.

OP already randomly cancelled therapy because she refused to let her child have privacy (listening through the walls, demanding to be in sessions). OP is the problem here. Child likely has autism or OCD, but in the family dynamic, is the “identified patient.”

Wow, wtf. The kitchen is next to the room that has the computer that she did the Zoom on speaker on. The walls are thin. I was making dinner. She claimed we never let her go on school field trips. There were no school field trips since 2019 because of covid. The first opportunity will be this spring. My child knew all of this yet was spinning a yarn making her parents to be the bad guys. The very young therapist (the only one available in the practice) refused twice to do family therapy whatsoever, so there was no way to explain to the therapist the actual truth. My child has a lying problem, she will lie about anything and everything. You have to see her in action to believe it. I am sorry, PP, that this situation does not fit your narrative, but this is a problem that her grandparents and two different schools have been witnessing and dealing with as well for the past few years. This is some specific problem and I am seeking help in the special needs forum while trying to get her in to a different psychology practice. I am trying to help her,I don't know what is causing this behavior, I am not the "problem". I was just posting to see what possible diagnoses people could think of, obviously this is not a diagnostic session with professsionals. I wanted to see if other parents had similar experiences and recommendations. I definitley did not randomly cancel therapy because I refused to let her "have privacy". My daugher has a lot of privacy. My other child is on the spectrum, she is not "the identified patient in the family dynamic". I don't even know what that means. Very reckless of you to be saying things like that. Please, if there are no specific suggestions for where to take her or what this sounds like, do not comment like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The sudden onset, along with the OCD symptoms and “completely different personality” sounds so much like PANDAS to me.

OP here, if it started in February 2020 (actually after she was ill with something for about 2 months that caused severe stomach pain that we had many many doctor appointments and even imaging for), how are going to treat that three years later? She just had a course of Augmentin for a sinus infection about a month and 1/2 ago. No cahnge in behavior that i can recall.

Feb 2020 is the middle of covid school closures OP. Was she in school?

Schools closed mid march 2020, 2/2020 was still regular school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The sudden onset, along with the OCD symptoms and “completely different personality” sounds so much like PANDAS to me.

OP here, if it started in February 2020 (actually after she was ill with something for about 2 months that caused severe stomach pain that we had many many doctor appointments and even imaging for), how are going to treat that three years later? She just had a course of Augmentin for a sinus infection about a month and 1/2 ago. No cahnge in behavior that i can recall.

Feb 2020 is the middle of covid school closures OP. Was she in school?

She missed a week or week and 1/2 of school from the unknown virus that turned into chronic on/off colicky stomach pain. For a while we thought it could be appendicitis. Her school didn't close until March I think.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The sudden onset, along with the OCD symptoms and “completely different personality” sounds so much like PANDAS to me.

OP here, if it started in February 2020 (actually after she was ill with something for about 2 months that caused severe stomach pain that we had many many doctor appointments and even imaging for), how are going to treat that three years later? She just had a course of Augmentin for a sinus infection about a month and 1/2 ago. No cahnge in behavior that i can recall.

Feb 2020 is the middle of covid school closures OP. Was she in school?

She missed a week or week and 1/2 of school from the unknown virus that turned into chronic on/off colicky stomach pain. For a while we thought it could be appendicitis. Her school didn't close until March I think.

OP again- was there covid here in February?

[Anonymous]

I agree, OP. People should not assume that you are the problem or that you aren't working toward the best solution for your child.

I think you need to get a complete physical and mental evaluation. It could just be hormones. It could be an illness. It could be bullying, abuse, peer pressure... or anything!

I'm glad to read that you're pursuing therapy.

[Anonymous]

Your child is in complete crisis OP. I’m not saying your behavior caused this, you point to a lot of significant stressors in 2020 that probably sent her down this path.

But your behavior going forward and your skill at finding a therapist for her, that includes skill training for you, are critical for turning this situation around before your daughter is lost entirely.

It is not easy to have a child in this situation plus another one with ASD. I feel for you.

But please keep in mind that you daughter is sick and needs you. It is not that she is bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another perspective on therapy... I would put her back into therapy. I would tell the therapist the exact lies that she's telling and see if that can be addressed in therapy. There are going to be a lot of boring, no progress sessions. But the child should know that her BS is being called out. No one believes the lies. She should not discontinue therapy until/unless she starts being real.

I would tell her that she doesn't have to talk to you, but she has to talk to someone. She doesn't have to like that therapist... but she has to continue with someone.

I'm sorry but it sounds like your child is in crisis and is lashing out in destructive ways.

OP already randomly cancelled therapy because she refused to let her child have privacy (listening through the walls, demanding to be in sessions). OP is the problem here. Child likely has autism or OCD, but in the family dynamic, is the “identified patient.”

You are assuming OP's family is dysfunctional. We don't know if it is or isn't. But at age 10-11 therapy - including for Autism or OCD - should include the parents. OP was right to cancel with this therapist as it was counterproductive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your child is in complete crisis OP. I’m not saying your behavior caused this, you point to a lot of significant stressors in 2020 that probably sent her down this path.

But your behavior going forward and your skill at finding a therapist for her, that includes skill training for you, are critical for turning this situation around before your daughter is lost entirely.

It is not easy to have a child in this situation plus another one with ASD. I feel for you.

But please keep in mind that you daughter is sick and needs you. It is not that she is bad.

Me again to say ideally you find a DBT trained therapist. Call literally every qualified therapist in a 20 mile radius and plead. Also call your pediatrician and ask for advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your child is in complete crisis OP. I’m not saying your behavior caused this, you point to a lot of significant stressors in 2020 that probably sent her down this path.

But your behavior going forward and your skill at finding a therapist for her, that includes skill training for you, are critical for turning this situation around before your daughter is lost entirely.

It is not easy to have a child in this situation plus another one with ASD. I feel for you.

But please keep in mind that you daughter is sick and needs you. It is not that she is bad.

OP here, thanks. Do I pursue psychiatrist or psychologist or a therapist right now? The wait lists everywhere are very long.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your child is in complete crisis OP. I’m not saying your behavior caused this, you point to a lot of significant stressors in 2020 that probably sent her down this path.

But your behavior going forward and your skill at finding a therapist for her, that includes skill training for you, are critical for turning this situation around before your daughter is lost entirely.

It is not easy to have a child in this situation plus another one with ASD. I feel for you.

But please keep in mind that you daughter is sick and needs you. It is not that she is bad.

Me again to say ideally you find a DBT trained therapist. Call literally every qualified therapist in a 20 mile radius and plead. Also call your pediatrician and ask for advice.

What's DBT?

[Anonymous]

I would second the suggestion for NAMI support group. They are filled with people with a lot of experience and I have found them to be really non-judgmental.

I would also keep looking for a therapist. Are you in the DC area? There are some practices with experience with OCD that have been recommended here before. My son’s will talk to the parent at the end of the session privately but won’t necessarily share everything. Family therapist or parent coach separately might also be helpful.

Good luck with everything!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would second the suggestion for NAMI support group. They are filled with people with a lot of experience and I have found them to be really non-judgmental.

I would also keep looking for a therapist. Are you in the DC area? There are some practices with experience with OCD that have been recommended here before. My son’s will talk to the parent at the end of the session privately but won’t necessarily share everything. Family therapist or parent coach separately might also be helpful.

Good luck with everything!

What is NAMI?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another perspective on therapy... I would put her back into therapy. I would tell the therapist the exact lies that she's telling and see if that can be addressed in therapy. There are going to be a lot of boring, no progress sessions. But the child should know that her BS is being called out. No one believes the lies. She should not discontinue therapy until/unless she starts being real.

I would tell her that she doesn't have to talk to you, but she has to talk to someone. She doesn't have to like that therapist... but she has to continue with someone.

I'm sorry but it sounds like your child is in crisis and is lashing out in destructive ways.

OP already randomly cancelled therapy because she refused to let her child have privacy (listening through the walls, demanding to be in sessions). OP is the problem here. Child likely has autism or OCD, but in the family dynamic, is the “identified patient.”

Wow, wtf. The kitchen is next to the room that has the computer that she did the Zoom on speaker on. The walls are thin. I was making dinner. She claimed we never let her go on school field trips. There were no school field trips since 2019 because of covid. The first opportunity will be this spring. My child knew all of this yet was spinning a yarn making her parents to be the bad guys. The very young therapist (the only one available in the practice) refused twice to do family therapy whatsoever, so there was no way to explain to the therapist the actual truth. My child has a lying problem, she will lie about anything and everything. You have to see her in action to believe it. I am sorry, PP, that this situation does not fit your narrative, but this is a problem that her grandparents and two different schools have been witnessing and dealing with as well for the past few years. This is some specific problem and I am seeking help in the special needs forum while trying to get her in to a different psychology practice. I am trying to help her,I don't know what is causing this behavior, I am not the "problem". I was just posting to see what possible diagnoses people could think of, obviously this is not a diagnostic session with professsionals. I wanted to see if other parents had similar experiences and recommendations. I definitley did not randomly cancel therapy because I refused to let her "have privacy". My daugher has a lot of privacy. My other child is on the spectrum, she is not "the identified patient in the family dynamic". I don't even know what that means. Very reckless of you to be saying things like that. Please, if there are no specific suggestions for where to take her or what this sounds like, do not comment like that.

You literally canceled therapy because you were eavedropping OP. I’m not saying she doesn’t need support - I’m saying you need to get your head screwed on straight and stop demonizing her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The sudden onset, along with the OCD symptoms and “completely different personality” sounds so much like PANDAS to me.

OP here, if it started in February 2020 (actually after she was ill with something for about 2 months that caused severe stomach pain that we had many many doctor appointments and even imaging for), how are going to treat that three years later? She just had a course of Augmentin for a sinus infection about a month and 1/2 ago. No cahnge in behavior that i can recall.

Feb 2020 is the middle of covid school closures OP. Was she in school?

She missed a week or week and 1/2 of school from the unknown virus that turned into chronic on/off colicky stomach pain. For a while we thought it could be appendicitis. Her school didn't close until March I think.

so the behavior changed right when covid started. OP seems pretty related to me.

[Anonymous]

I suggested Merrifiield but if you’re in Maryland Shepherd-Pratt has a similar walk-in— but do get there at 9am. I feel for you that your daughter has significantly deteriorated and needs so much help.

I hope you can get in soon, like next couple of days.