Rude people on Buy Nothing/Freecycle groups

[Anonymous]

I dislike the "pick me because" vibe of Buy Nothing. I dont want to judge your reasons! I usually go with the person who is closest / can pick up soonest, or else the first to respond. I appreciate that people are taking stuff I don't want.

Covid era "porch pickup" has solved a lot of the flakiness for me. "It's on the porch, come by any time. If you don't come by X date I will offer to the next person interested."

[Anonymous]

Ours is fairly tame. No drama that I’ve noticed. I won’t respond to “interested” or “next” in the comments. I only respond to DMs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I dislike the "pick me because" vibe of Buy Nothing. I dont want to judge your reasons! I usually go with the person who is closest / can pick up soonest, or else the first to respond. I appreciate that people are taking stuff I don't want.

Covid era "porch pickup" has solved a lot of the flakiness for me. "It's on the porch, come by any time. If you don't come by X date I will offer to the next person interested."

People don’t give reasons on ours. That would drive me batty.

[Anonymous]

I also hate no shows, because I just want the stuff out of my house, but I don't care much about the rest. For the most part, it's worked well for me. But agree that it can attract some "types."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I kind of agree but if you're occasionally trying to sell things (whether you think it's a good deal or not) on Buy Nothing or Freecycle groups, you're the rude one in that interaction.

OP here. I distinctly said I sell things in “sale/swap groups.” I of course think it would be rude (and against rules) to try to sell in Buy Nothing, which is why I clearly made the distinction.

[Anonymous]

I’ve been ghosted so many times my people. It makes trying to do a good deed not worth the time. Funny enough, I’ve had more luck when I posted something for five dollars versus for free. They actually will show up, maybe it’s because it has some type of value attached and seems more like a deal versus some thing somebody was just gonna throw out? I don’t know.

[Anonymous]

My Arlington Buy Nothing group is amazing. It’s over 2000 people and I’ve probably gifted 100 times and only had 1 no show. I’ve received some awesome stuff too.

Don’t even get me started on MONA. Everything is at least 5 emails even for a $5 bag of baby clothes. I once emailed back and forth with a lady 10 times over a week about a baby seat for an adult bike. I was asking $10 for a $90 seat. She then tried to give it back because her baby was too chunky. Sorry lady, it’s yours now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been ghosted so many times my people. It makes trying to do a good deed not worth the time. Funny enough, I’ve had more luck when I posted something for five dollars versus for free. They actually will show up, maybe it’s because it has some type of value attached and seems more like a deal versus some thing somebody was just gonna throw out? I don’t know.

Go donate to Goodwill then. People are helping you get rid of your crap so you don't have to gather a bunch at once and haul it around in your trunk for a month. It's a mutual beneficial program and doesn't make you eligible for sainthood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I kind of agree but if you're occasionally trying to sell things (whether you think it's a good deal or not) on Buy Nothing or Freecycle groups, you're the rude one in that interaction.

OP here. I distinctly said I sell things in “sale/swap groups.” I of course think it would be rude (and against rules) to try to sell in Buy Nothing, which is why I clearly made the distinction.

What does that have to do with your post, the title, your complaints on this thread? Why include a detailed description about a specific sale/swap offer of a purse in a complaint about buy nothing/freecycle participants? It makes no sense. You made a "clear distinction" . . . to what end?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been ghosted so many times my people. It makes trying to do a good deed not worth the time. Funny enough, I’ve had more luck when I posted something for five dollars versus for free. They actually will show up, maybe it’s because it has some type of value attached and seems more like a deal versus some thing somebody was just gonna throw out? I don’t know.

You're not doing a good deed when you post something to buy nothing. You're getting something out of the interaction (this thing that I don't use is no longer in my house) and they're getting something out of it (hey I've been looking for one of those) and you're both supposed to be building community ties. If you look at the group as your charity project you're probably going to be irritated because no one is in awe of your generosity.

I sometimes get no shows, which are annoying, so I try to wait and post bigger batches of things at once with a preference for someone who takes more than one item. Then there's less to coordinate, and the person who's willing to take 4 things for the one they really really want it more likely to show up because they want it enough to volunteer to take the other three in the first place, if that makes sense.

[Anonymous]

I post in our neighborhood group, and say I'll drop it on your doorstep. This way, I can drop it on my time (it's local, so not out of my way) and no worries about no-shows. Doesn't work for all stuff, but at least for smaller stuff it's fine. I drop it after dropping the kids at school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I kind of agree but if you're occasionally trying to sell things (whether you think it's a good deal or not) on Buy Nothing or Freecycle groups, you're the rude one in that interaction.

OP here. I distinctly said I sell things in “sale/swap groups.” I of course think it would be rude (and against rules) to try to sell in Buy Nothing, which is why I clearly made the distinction.

What does that have to do with your post, the title, your complaints on this thread? Why include a detailed description about a specific sale/swap offer of a purse in a complaint about buy nothing/freecycle participants? It makes no sense. You made a "clear distinction" . . . to what end?

I'll go slow so you can keep up. In my original post, I said a few things irritate me about Buy Nothing groups (where I give things away for free), and some of the sale/swap groups where I have sold things at a low price.

A poster then said it's rude to sell things in a Buy Nothing or Freecycle group.

I then clarified that of course I'm not selling things in Buy Nothing groups.

Go back to my original post and read slowly. You will get there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been ghosted so many times my people. It makes trying to do a good deed not worth the time. Funny enough, I’ve had more luck when I posted something for five dollars versus for free. They actually will show up, maybe it’s because it has some type of value attached and seems more like a deal versus some thing somebody was just gonna throw out? I don’t know.

You're not doing a good deed when you post something to buy nothing. You're getting something out of the interaction (this thing that I don't use is no longer in my house) and they're getting something out of it (hey I've been looking for one of those) and you're both supposed to be building community ties. If you look at the group as your charity project you're probably going to be irritated because no one is in awe of your generosity.

I sometimes get no shows, which are annoying, so I try to wait and post bigger batches of things at once with a preference for someone who takes more than one item. Then there's less to coordinate, and the person who's willing to take 4 things for the one they really really want it more likely to show up because they want it enough to volunteer to take the other three in the first place, if that makes sense.

Disagree- unless it’s huge and bulky it’s a lot easier to just throw away most unwanted items than take the time to reasonably clean them, post and arrange pick up. Taking time out of your day to make them available to someone else who can use them is a good deed and definitely not one I would continue if the recipients were routinely rude/entitled.

[Anonymous]

Totally agree with annoying-ness of the no shows, but disagree with calling out the PP talking about doing a good deed. I recently donated a bunch of baby gear that was barely knew used: A stroller, a playpen, three baby gates and a bunch more items. things I easily could have sold and benefited from the sales. The mom it went to cried when picking it up because she was so happy that somebody posted items that she really could use and didn’t have money for it all. In my book that’s a good deed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I also hate no shows, because I just want the stuff out of my house, but I don't care much about the rest. For the most part, it's worked well for me. But agree that it can attract some "types."

Yeah, I've had pretty good luck. I don't mind people being brief in the comments; it's buy nothing.