Rude people on Buy Nothing/Freecycle groups

[Anonymous]

I regular give away items like good-condition toys and clothing my children have outgrown on the local Buy Nothing group. I’ve also sold a few things for very low prices, like $25 for a Kate Spade diaper bag on sale/swap groups.

I love the fact that the items are getting a good home. I’ve also gotten a few items I really love and use all the time.

What I don’t love is the rude people who:
1) Say they want it and don’t pick up, or who “oops I forgot can I come by tomorrow” and still no-show
2) Ask a million questions and ask for a million pictures—like it’s a free, good-condition but definitely used Elsa costume. You either want it or you don’t, it’s FREE. I’m not taking multiple angles or writing long description of the condition of each seam. In or out.
3) People who simply say “ME” or “NEXT.” I can go with “Interested,” that’s fine. But if you put “ME,” that’s just so rude. How about, “I’d love this if it’s still available.” It takes two seconds to write something polite.

I can’t believe how rude some people are about free things.

[Anonymous]

I agree! People are so rude.

[Anonymous]

Agree but I try to let it go. Indicative of our society I guess? I definitely select ppl based on their responses if an item is popular.

[Anonymous]

I do too and this is why I don't post things for free. The people who jump at free never seem to show up and always have issues. They just seem to be flaky and unreliable. Instead I sell for $2-5 and I get responsible people who show within the hour.

For instance I was selling a 2 year old, excellent condition washing machine with all the bells and whistles (came with the house, but I already had my own I was moving) for $25. People lead me on for days that they were showing. Some people even had the nerve to ask if we could deliver it. One person arrived with a car and wanted us to load it for her (how the heck would a washing machine fit in a car?!). I deleted the ad and reposted it for $100 and it was gone later that day. I guess it's just suspicious when things are priced too cheaply. And a lot of people wouldn't take something that's free because they think it's meant for someone who is needy.

[Anonymous]

I mostly agree. I do think if people are going to participate, you need to give details up front and that clears up a lot of problems. I always include location, dimensions, and condition with GOOD pictures and I've never had an issue with people flaking or asking too many questions.

It is irritating if you want someone to haul away a big piece of furniture for free but you act huffy if someone needs to know the size or acts surprised when they pick up that there is a lot of damage not mentioned. THAT is rude of the "giver."

[Anonymous]

Agree, OP, that people can be rude, but you control the process to a large degree. I really see my buy nothing groups as doing a favor for me. If someone doesn't show up, then you contact the next person as soon as it is convenient for you. People who are rude, you just ignore. You don't have to give your things to rude people.

For me, actually, the worst part of the buy nothing groups is when a known hoarder asks for my things. I ignore the request, but I do feel bad for the hoarder's family.

[Anonymous]

I sympathize and also get really annoyed when folks say “NIL,” even though the rules are clear that there’s no line. There’s a lot of social pressure in my neighborhood to just go in order of claims, which results in the same folks getting all the food stuff. Folks also fail to show up around half the time. It’s not ideal, but I am not willing to take on the role of enforcing the rules or otherwise chastising folks for breaking them. So I’m venting here.

[Anonymous]

It’s gotten to big for it’s own good and now it’s full of rude people.

[Anonymous]

I kind of agree but if you're occasionally trying to sell things (whether you think it's a good deal or not) on Buy Nothing or Freecycle groups, you're the rude one in that interaction.

[Anonymous]

I had someone ask me to deliver their free items! They lived around 30 minutes away from me.

[Anonymous]

I definitely keep track if people are serial no-shows. But I also only try to post stuff that would have multiple people interested, so if the first person doesn't come I just move own the list.

It is annoying though sometimes. I find when I get too annoyed it's better to just take stuff to Goodwill or throw it out. Not everything needs to be posted to FB.

[Anonymous]

One of the most irritating ones in our group is also a moderator. She'll break the rules for herself and then constantly delete other people's posts if the dare to post a link or something.

[Anonymous]

Once I was giving away lots of barely used baby bottles (my baby refused the bottle; I was a FTM and freaked out and bought every brand in desperation but none worked). Someone claimed them and said she’d come by later to pick them up. It was a snowy day.

Lady pulls up in a giant Mercedes then calls my cell and tells me to bring them out to her.

Uh, seriously? That’s not how this works. If you want it for free, you get your butt out of your Mercedes and walk fifteen feet to my porch to grab them.

[Anonymous]

Our buy nothing asks people to report no-shows, and I do. I also won’t give my items to people who have not picked up other items. For some people that page is a sport to them. There’s a pattern of people who just like to be first and always want whatever people are giving away. I don’t give to them.

[Anonymous]

I think you are being a bit dramatic. Yes the no shows, can be an issue. Report them. I've only had one no show.

NIL, next, interested...all completely fine. I figure they are doing ME a favor by hauling away my crap. I feel better once I declutter. I don't need anyone to send nice, cutsie messages in order to placate my feelings.