I hate having friends’ kids over

[Anonymous]

I'm a nanny and occasionally have kids over to my apartment for various reasons. Kids definitely act differently here than at home and I have to remind them not to jump on the couch, not to drop their stuff everywhere etc.

It's really ok to tell them the rules in your house, and to tell them to stop doing XYZ. I know it feels awkward to boss other people's kids around, but I promise it's ok--even at the park if they're hurting other kids. Some kids just need extra reminders about rules and boundaries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a nanny and occasionally have kids over to my apartment for various reasons. Kids definitely act differently here than at home and I have to remind them not to jump on the couch, not to drop their stuff everywhere etc.

It's really ok to tell them the rules in your house, and to tell them to stop doing XYZ. I know it feels awkward to boss other people's kids around, but I promise it's ok--even at the park if they're hurting other kids. Some kids just need extra reminders about rules and boundaries.

+1

Also, if the kid/s has/have issues, the parents might not be up front, which is COMPLETELY unfair to you (and their kid, too!). God forbid a child get hurt in your home. You want to avoid getting sued (if they are the type).

[Anonymous]

Do you have kids, OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Um, hello, why don’t YOU hire a babysitter? Have the babysitter supervise pizza and a movie in the basement.

Why don't you, then?

Let’s walk through this slowly so that you can understand: OP wants to talk and hang out with the parents, but the parents can’t afford a sitter, so the kids have to come to OP’s house, too. OP takes a shot at what her friends cannot afford, which means she must be smugly, rich and superior. If so, she can hire a sitter to watch the kids at her home. Da dee!

[Anonymous]

Do you have kids, OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Um, hello, why don’t YOU hire a babysitter? Have the babysitter supervise pizza and a movie in the basement.

Why don't you, then?

Let’s walk through this slowly so that you can understand: OP wants to talk and hang out with the parents, but the parents can’t afford a sitter, so the kids have to come to OP’s house, too. OP takes a shot at what her friends cannot afford, which means she must be smugly, rich and superior. If so, she can hire a sitter to watch the kids at her home. Da dee!

Maybe stop projecting?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a nanny and occasionally have kids over to my apartment for various reasons. Kids definitely act differently here than at home and I have to remind them not to jump on the couch, not to drop their stuff everywhere etc.

It's really ok to tell them the rules in your house, and to tell them to stop doing XYZ. I know it feels awkward to boss other people's kids around, but I promise it's ok--even at the park if they're hurting other kids. Some kids just need extra reminders about rules and boundaries.

It feels like I have to parent other kids in addition to hosting the party.
“Larla, don’t jump on the coach” “Larla, don’t stick hands into bowls of food”, “Larla, don’t run around the house with food”, “Don’t act like a rabid dog when someone asks you a question” “Don’t try to break the treadmill” “Don’t bang on the piano full force”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you have kids, OP?

I do. My kid is older and well behaved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a nanny and occasionally have kids over to my apartment for various reasons. Kids definitely act differently here than at home and I have to remind them not to jump on the couch, not to drop their stuff everywhere etc.

It's really ok to tell them the rules in your house, and to tell them to stop doing XYZ. I know it feels awkward to boss other people's kids around, but I promise it's ok--even at the park if they're hurting other kids. Some kids just need extra reminders about rules and boundaries.

It feels like I have to parent other kids in addition to hosting the party.
“Larla, don’t jump on the coach” “Larla, don’t stick hands into bowls of food”, “Larla, don’t run around the house with food”, “Don’t act like a rabid dog when someone asks you a question” “Don’t try to break the treadmill” “Don’t bang on the piano full force”

I agree. Parents who want to be checked out while at your house (because that is how they parent) will come down on you for wanting to have boundaries. If they won't parent, while in your house, you have every right to announce (loudly, if you wish) - that we have rules here and we don't touch the piano, eat outside the kitchen, etc. Your house, your rules. If they don't like it, they can host! Which probably won't happen - so the park, it is!

[Anonymous]

You need to either be very explicit about adults-only gatherings, or change the venue. It sounds like maybe you don’t have kids and there’s not much for them to do in your house? Take it outside or somewhere kid-friendly if you really like these people. Otherwise, stop inviting and expecting model behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have kids, OP?

I do. My kid is older and well behaved.

Because you paid attention to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need to either be very explicit about adults-only gatherings, or change the venue. It sounds like maybe you don’t have kids and there’s not much for them to do in your house? Take it outside or somewhere kid-friendly if you really like these people. Otherwise, stop inviting and expecting model behavior.

\

OP, do you have activities at your house - maybe they can spend so many minutes on this, then that, etc.

Otherwise, feel free to not host - you owe people nothing, truly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have kids, OP?

I do. My kid is older and well behaved.

Older than 12? There’s your sitter!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have kids, OP?

I do. My kid is older and well behaved.

Older than 12? There’s your sitter!

How much you paying them?

[Anonymous]

I would hire a h.s. student to entertain them OP