who pays for dinner, and how do you decide?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you poor? To guys are pissed about paying for Father's Day dinner? Seriously?

This. Wth?

[Anonymous]

How old is your Dad? Watch his cognitive decline. Finances is the first indicator of dementia type problems, but often unnoticed by family.

But more likely it was Father’s Day weekend!!!!! Family came in for Father’s Day! And it was an expensive restaurant because of the vegan.

How much could his meal have been really?!? This is between the kids not the Dad.

[Anonymous]

You all agreed to eat out. Eating out costs money.

How else would you have had dinner?

Poor Dad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old is your Dad? Watch his cognitive decline. Finances is the first indicator of dementia type problems, but often unnoticed by family.

But more likely it was Father’s Day weekend!!!!! Family came in for Father’s Day! And it was an expensive restaurant because of the vegan.

How much could his meal have been really?!? This is between the kids not the Dad.

It's nothing to do with "cognitive decline" when a father doesn't quick-reach for his credit card on Father's Day weekend, especially after suffering through a freaking vegan meal for his precious special vegan daughter.

[Anonymous]

Maybe he thought the Saturday vegan dinner was his Father’s Day dinner and was not expecting ANOTHER dinner on Sunday. OP, you and sibling should communicate with dad better next year.

[Anonymous]

I would stop talking about it with sister, 'sis I know, lets drop it, it was a nice meal and lovely to catch up, we will plan better next year'.

And then do so. Tell dad you're bringing everything to cook a lovely meal on Saturday and breakfast on Sunday, then on Sunday night you are treating him to XYZ restaurant.

When my family comes to town, once or twice a year I like to do 'light catering'. No eating out, but something gets dropped off or picked up for a Greek or Italian spot with big portions and everyone is happy. I even do a sandwhich tray from the local super market to make sure lunch is covered. When you prepare, you save.

[Anonymous]

Next time say no to a pricy restaurant. Each of you chip on for dad and pay your own.

[Anonymous]

What DC vegan restaurant is exorbitant? Dying to know...

[Anonymous]

How do you both have problems with money and spending it? One of you should have fine paying for both days.
I work at the restaurant. We are hiring. You have year to come and work and make money so you can pay next year and not talk about it.

[Anonymous]

We don’t generally have issues with paying at restaurants.
We usually cover the parents and siblings split the bill. Sometimes one person picks up the tab and someone else does it another time.
We don’t try to make it exactly equal. Same with friends. Usually we just split even if it is uneven. A few times bill has been unexpectedly high but what can you do. Better to just move on

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you poor? To guys are pissed about paying for Father's Day dinner? Seriously?

OP is talking about the "extra" dinner on Saturday night.

Sorry you guys were thrown an unexpected charge. Best you can do is use it for info next time when he offers to eat out to either look at the menu first or suggest cooking at home. and vegan sister can help you decide next year's menu since she's well-versed.

Ok so that makes two dinners but still is it worth getting stressed over?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What DC vegan restaurant is exorbitant? Dying to know...

Same. I can't think of any that would evoke a reaction like this. Sure, some places with vegan options can be expensive, but a dedicated vegan place?

OP - what restaurant?

[Anonymous]

It was Father's day weekend and I would not have expected him to pay. There is nothing wrong with telling someone, family or friends, that you want to go to a $$ or $$$ restaurant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What DC vegan restaurant is exorbitant? Dying to know...

Same. I can't think of any that would evoke a reaction like this. Sure, some places with vegan options can be expensive, but a dedicated vegan place?

OP - what restaurant?

Elizabeth Gone Raw maybe?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All I can advise is that you prepare yourself when you visit. Either bring a meal or check out the menu of the restaurant your father might suggest. Regarding who is paying, since it was Father's Day, maybe your dad assumed it was a gift.

That was my first thought - that he assumed the dinner was a gift to him for Father's Day. My Dad is like yours, he always pays, but I can see him thinking that the dinner was a gift and so he wouldn't get out his wallet.

The only thing ... are you sure your dad is doing okay financially? After the dust settles maybe you can either hint around or even ask directly how he's doing financially. As you're talking maybe bring up inflation or something related to gas prices and see where the conversation goes.