SIL having several baby showers for 2nd baby - am I supposed to send gifts to all of them?

[Anonymous]

That’s really, really tacky to have a shower for a second kid. I’d probably go to the one closest to my house because it’s family, but I’d just give whatever give amount of planned to give when baby was born and nothing else. Probably clothes. I wouldn’t be buying the big ticket items.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, every sentence of your post is dripping with your disdain. Why go at all if you hate her so much? Gross.

+1

Agree. Maybe SIL only needs certain items, which is fine, OP. Maybe a bunch of people can go in on one big item. It really doesn't have to be a big deal, OP. Really.

Buy what you want, chances are, your SIL really does not care about presents or a "gift grab" (sic) nearly as much as you.

When I hear/read the anti SIL sentiment, I wonder how threatened the OP really feels about the new woman in the family. So obvious.

It IS a social faux-pas to have several showers. Most wealthy nations don't even have this baby shower tradition. It is clearly a gift grab, but the first shower is tolerable and the others... not so much.

OP can be kind and buy something. But the SIL is pegged as materialistic, certainly.

Meh. I know someone (actually a couple moms) who had more than one baby shower. The showers were not planned by her, they were planned by her friends, another by her family, another by her coworkers - the groups wanted to throw the showers, and the showers were each a surprise. The new moms didn't need anything, but each put together a registry for anyone that wanted to participate.

OP, if you think SIL doesn't "need" anything, then don't buy anything. Get her a gift card to a nice baby store or something, or nothing......you sound bitter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:we bought the Silver Cross Balmoral Pram because we didn’t feel comfortable asking friends for it.

Okay?

[Anonymous]

She’s not expecting 4 gifts from you and you know that. She’s probably having 4 showers so that a variety of people can buy what she wants which is obnoxious to you. Just get her whatever you want and move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:we bought the Silver Cross Balmoral Pram because we didn’t feel comfortable asking friends for it.

They’re still judging you for spending $4500 for a stroller. Are you trying to be Kate Middleton? What a ridiculous waste of money that screams insecurity.

[Anonymous]

IMO it’s not worth the energy suck to hate on these people. How long did it take you just to write this out for instance? How long have you been stewing about this? Not being snarky, genuinely sincere based on people like this in my own life. It’s just not worth it. Shrug your shoulders and let it goooo.

Buy one big item that you take in person to the first shower then a couple smaller things for the additional showers that you don’t attend it person (like a really cute outfit).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:we bought the Silver Cross Balmoral Pram because we didn’t feel comfortable asking friends for it.

I had to Google that. Do you actually use it? Thankfully I’ve never seen one IRL on the street.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:we bought the Silver Cross Balmoral Pram because we didn’t feel comfortable asking friends for it.

They’re still judging you for spending $4500 for a stroller. Are you trying to be Kate Middleton? What a ridiculous waste of money that screams insecurity.

Pretentious and tacky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:we bought the Silver Cross Balmoral Pram because we didn’t feel comfortable asking friends for it.

I had to Google that. Do you actually use it? Thankfully I’ve never seen one IRL on the street.

I’m would lol if I saw some pretentious woman prancing around with that thing. As soon as the kid can sit up it’s useless.

[Anonymous]

We get it; you’re a better person than your SIL. Just get her one gift (that fits your superior standards) and be done with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, every sentence of your post is dripping with your disdain. Why go at all if you hate her so much? Gross.

+1

Agree. Maybe SIL only needs certain items, which is fine, OP. Maybe a bunch of people can go in on one big item. It really doesn't have to be a big deal, OP. Really.

Buy what you want, chances are, your SIL really does not care about presents or a "gift grab" (sic) nearly as much as you.

When I hear/read the anti SIL sentiment, I wonder how threatened the OP really feels about the new woman in the family. So obvious.

It IS a social faux-pas to have several showers. Most wealthy nations don't even have this baby shower tradition. It is clearly a gift grab, but the first shower is tolerable and the others... not so much.

OP can be kind and buy something. But the SIL is pegged as materialistic, certainly.

Meh. I know someone (actually a couple moms) who had more than one baby shower. The showers were not planned by her, they were planned by her friends, another by her family, another by her coworkers - the groups wanted to throw the showers, and the showers were each a surprise. The new moms didn't need anything, but each put together a registry for anyone that wanted to participate.

OP, if you think SIL doesn't "need" anything, then don't buy anything. Get her a gift card to a nice baby store or something, or nothing......you sound bitter.

Agreed, it's a faux pas because it's a blatant gift grab.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, every sentence of your post is dripping with your disdain. Why go at all if you hate her so much? Gross.

NP. You spend so much time on DCUM and love to end your posts with your own disdainful “Gross.” Grow up. This lady wants to vent about her obnoxious, materialistic SIL. She’s allowed.

Hahha, I was going to ask the same thing. Lately there seems to be a poster who has the maturity of a tween, constantly saying "gross" to all manner of things. There can't possibly be that many adults who speak this way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We get it; you’re a better person than your SIL. Just get her one gift (that fits your superior standards) and be done with it.

She absolutely is a better person than her shallow, materialistic SIL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, every sentence of your post is dripping with your disdain. Why go at all if you hate her so much? Gross.

+1

Agree. Maybe SIL only needs certain items, which is fine, OP. Maybe a bunch of people can go in on one big item. It really doesn't have to be a big deal, OP. Really.

Buy what you want, chances are, your SIL really does not care about presents or a "gift grab" (sic) nearly as much as you.

When I hear/read the anti SIL sentiment, I wonder how threatened the OP really feels about the new woman in the family. So obvious.

It IS a social faux-pas to have several showers. Most wealthy nations don't even have this baby shower tradition. It is clearly a gift grab, but the first shower is tolerable and the others... not so much.


OP can be kind and buy something. But the SIL is pegged as materialistic, certainly.

Meh. I know someone (actually a couple moms) who had more than one baby shower. The showers were not planned by her, they were planned by her friends, another by her family, another by her coworkers - the groups wanted to throw the showers, and the showers were each a surprise. The new moms didn't need anything, but each put together a registry for anyone that wanted to participate.

OP, if you think SIL doesn't "need" anything, then don't buy anything. Get her a gift card to a nice baby store or something, or nothing......you sound bitter.

For their 2nd child? That wasn't born 10+ years later? If so, you know a lot of crass women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:we bought the Silver Cross Balmoral Pram because we didn’t feel comfortable asking friends for it.

They’re still judging you for spending $4500 for a stroller. Are you trying to be Kate Middleton? What a ridiculous waste of money that screams insecurity.

Pretentious and tacky.

What is she pretending to be?