I am 54, and need some serious advise about weight, some deperession, in a rut.

[Anonymous]

Since you mentioned feeling depressed, I echo the others who have suggested starting with exercise first. It will lift your mood and make it easier to tackle the food later on. Start with something easy so that you’ll be more likely to do it. Also, I agree with PP who said health and fitness is a lifelong endeavor. Even when you have a bad day or days, pick it back up and keep going. You can do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not trying to be mean, but it seems like you have a lot of self-worth wrapped up in being attractive and that "you used to be beautiful". I think it could help your self-esteem if you accepted that at 54, your looks will not be valuable as they once were.

Regarding losing weight, I would focus on cutting out processed food, especially carbs. DCUM has a lot of low carb haters, but it worked for me and I lost 30 pounds and I've kept them off for 15 years.

+1 no one is as attractive in their 50s as they were when they were young.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Since you mentioned feeling depressed, I echo the others who have suggested starting with exercise first. It will lift your mood and make it easier to tackle the food later on. Start with something easy so that you’ll be more likely to do it. Also, I agree with PP who said health and fitness is a lifelong endeavor. Even when you have a bad day or days, pick it back up and keep going. You can do it.

+1 for me, exercise is not a chore. I love it. And so will you, once you start moving. Today I made a point to take a longer than usual walk because it is so beautiful. 13,597 steps and counting....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi PP. I’m turning 55 next month. I feel all of what you wrote. Also need to lose about 30 lbs. But would be really fine with 15 gone at this point.

Here’s what’s working for me right now: lifting weights. I joined Planet Fitness and have committed to going every morning Mon-Fri and doing a 30 minute weightlifting routine. It’s been the lift I’ve needed. Even though the scale isn’t moving, clothes fit better and legs & shoulders are getting toned. I followed this program: https://www.muscleandstrength.com/workouts/muscle-and-strength-womens-workout (I didn’t do the cardio)

On the weekends I go for a 3-5 mile walk.

Now I’m slowly starting to look at the food, especially the breads. I dropped the vanilla syrup from my daily cold brew. Stop eating by 8pm.

Finally, I just got my prescription for menopausal hormone therapy (Prempro). I’m just done with the night sweats disrupting my sleep. I’m crossing my fingers that this will help.I can’t ignore how interrupted sleep might be impacting the weight loss.

Please be gentle with yourself. As another poster said, pick one thing and focus on that.

This happened to me when I started lifting. I actually gained weight (muscle mass), but my clothes fit better, I stood straighter, moved more agilely and people remarked on how good I looked.

[Anonymous]

I am nearly 50 and get a little bothered when I see fine lines or slightly saggy boobs etc. Or when my daughter tells me I must start colouring my hair. I echo other sentiments. Avoid ultra-processed food. Make everything you eat from scratch, even dressings. Hidden sugars are a plague in ultra-processed food. Watch Dr Robert Lustig on YouTube. Eat three square meals of real high fiber food. Don't graze all day but eat three squares. Eat whole fat plain yoghurt. Avoid anything that has low or reduced fat. Go on daily brisk walks. Don't count calories.

Btw I am same weight as at 18. Metabolically healthy. About 6 years ago I gained 20 lbs over period of 5 months (moved across country, various reasons). Prior to my weight gain, I had stopped working and with all this sudden new time, I had started lifting weights and exercising daily. The weights added 5 lbs but I looked great. My appetite increased but that was ok BC of daily exercise and weights. I suddenly stopped BC I went back to work but I didn't cut my appetite or intake down. That's when I gained nearly 20. I hadn't stepped on scale in months but when I did I was shocked. That was the highest I've been ever other than pregnancies. It took a year for me to drop 20 lbs. I did three squares of real food and walked briskly daily. I also weigh frequently (4 times a week) and track on phone app. I'm ne CV er ok letting that weight creep up again.

Hang in there. You can do this. Slow and steady. Start reading labels. Consider a food label a warning label. Pepperidge farm whole wheat bread has added sugars. Eat Ezekiel. Sugar has 56 names so it is best to try to cook as much as possible.

[Anonymous]

I'm a huge fan of cognitive behavioral therapy to cut through negative self talk and just taking action. I used Beck Diet Book mental exercises.

Pick a simple habit to do 30 days in a row like keeping a water bottle next to bed and drinking it first thing in the morning. This will help with confidence.

You can do this.

[Anonymous]

Can you try to limit your eating to only 3 meals a day, no snacking? This eliminates a lot of sugar and junk. Then after you are used to that cut back portions and pay attention to quality. I think gaining some control will make you happier.

[Anonymous]

OP, it's sad no one know this about you. Why are you so invested in looking so put together?

[Anonymous]

I agree that starting with daily exercise (ok, 5-6 days a week) is a good idea. Then eliminating snacking would be my next step. Are your health markers good?

I used a support thread on DCUM last year to stay on track and it really helps. If you post, folks will join.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, it's sad no one know this about you. Why are you so invested in looking so put together?

There's nothing wrong with wanting to look put together and a little polished. It's not sad imo.

[Anonymous]

I found it helpful to track my meals with MyFitnessPal. Just doing that made me more conscious of what I was taking in. Add in exercise 3-5 days/week and I saw about 1 lb./week go away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: Have a wonderful husband, 4 amazing kids (3 out of house and 1 graduating). Have had some hardships but working through them. I need to lose about 30 lbs maybe even 35. I LOVE food, and eat a lot. I have almost no willpower. I would do anything to be a size 8 again. I don't need to be "skinny" just trim and mostly to feel good about myself.

I am starting to teeter on having depression because of it. I am sure someone out there can relate. Any advise? Quickest way to jump start some weight loss in hopes that it will motivate me to keep going? I really feel stuck. Suddenly I am feeling older, less healthy, fatter and therefore my self esteem is suffering badly. I put on a good and strong front but inside i feel somewhat worthless. The sad part is this is the first time I am saying/writing these words. I think anyone who knows me well would be shocked to hear this from me. The one who always seems to have it all together.

I am so sorry OP. I could have written your post. If food has become your crutch, then I'm going to venture to say that you aren't teetering on having depression. You are depressed. And you aren't depressed because you eat a lot and are overweight. You eat a lot and are overweight because you are depressed. So, I'm going to advise you to do what I did. Talk to your doctor, yes your internal medicine doctor, about a good antidepressant. All the other suggestions are fantastic, such as walking and cutting out certain foods, but when you are depressed, your brain literally doesn't allow you to do these things. I know what it is like to keep eating ice cream even though I despise how I look. I started taking Effexor 2 months ago and what a difference it has made. I now eat yogurt and fruit for breakfast, soup and salad for lunch and a small, simple dinner. I no longer eat ice cream even though everyone in my family still does ( I have 3 kids!) Taking medication isn't a perfect, long-term solution but it allows my brain to actually follow through on these "common sense" steps to being healthier. I've already lost 5 pounds and feel energized by that small victory. I am about 40 pounds overweight. If I can just lose 20 pounds I know that will give me the motivation to stay away from that damn ice cream....and then I will stop my medication. People will tell you to mediate, eat heathy and exercise but you should definitely also consider medication. Big hugs to you.

[Anonymous]

Stop drinking alcohol if you drink except for special occasions like holiday or vacation, etc. Also, try intermittent fasting to help get control of what/when you are eating.

You need to start exercising regularly--just pick something you can do easily like walking, bike riding, or pilates, etc. Start on with a goal of exercising 3 times a week. Do that for a month along with the other things and you should be able to start seeing changes in your body but also your habits. After a month, increase your workouts in frequency and intensity. I would also recommend you get out and move everyday--walk when you are running a short errand rather than driving. You need to change your daily habits to see the change in your appearance.

[Anonymous]

I see you are 54 and I ask this in all seriousness — have you had a colonoscopy recently? I lost 6 pounds as a result of my first colonoscopy (you need to restrict what you eat a day before, liquids only) and then I just kept dieting and lost another 40.

Otherwise I suggest focusing on what you eat. For me, exercise made me super hungry and made me feel like I deserved more food. I only lost when I focused on restricting what I took in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just change one thing OP. Stick with it every day for three weeks. Then you’ll automatically add another. You can do this!!!!

Sugar first? What else and in what order? Thank you.

Agree with the PPs who say exercise first for mental health, but you have to make it sustainable and achievable. How much do you currently walk? Add 2500 - 4000 steps to that and try to do it every day. I got an apple watch and am very motivated by the 'rings' that you close by moving and exercising, some people are motivated by a step goal. I found it helpful to set a goal of moving my body for 30 minutes every day, some days it is a weight session but other days I just walk for 30 minutes.

Other things to try after exercise (but only one at a time and don't add more until it feels very easy and attainable to do what you are currently doing):
-cut out drinks with calories (soda, juice, alcohol, sweet coffees)
-drink 3L of water per day
-no snacking after dinner
-add a scoop of vegetables to every meal and eat that first, slowly, and with water - you will eat less of whatever else is the main, but it won't feel restrictive
-increase step goal, move to doing hilly walks