Should white women who marry "ethnic" men change their last names?

[Anonymous]

Ethnic men are here to claim the White Women who refuse to settle for the entitled, low quality man children this country is producing these days. Jesus Rodriguez and Pajeet Ramanaganarara are here to take your jerbs and your women.

[Anonymous]

I don't think anyone should take anyone else's name, so that simplifies things somewhat.

[Anonymous]

I’m married to someone that is not the same race/ethnic background as me. Legally, I kept my maiden name and added DH’s name. As the years have gone on, I don’t use both, I tend to just use his. I’m not trying to fake who I am, it’s just easier. If you are dumb enough to assume it’s because I want to be more of a certain race/ethnicity, you’re an idiot and I would rather not talk to you anyway. My maiden name for the record could also be considered “ethnic” but my skin is white. Can’t assume everyone with white skin came from an English settler.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure why my marriage is any of your business. I'm an American-born Asian man and I am proud to be married to my wife. My wife is half 3rd generation Swedish and half English descendant from one of the original migrants on the Mayflower. My wife had her first husband's name when we married (she had been divorced for 3 years, but never changed her name back). The only restriction I asked was that she not keep her first husband's last name. I was find with her changing to my name, to her going back to her maiden name, or choosing a new surname for our family. She chose to change to my name and has been using my last name for 22 years now. She wanted our whole family unit to have the same surname. There has been no cultural appropriation, confusion or faked diversity. When asked, she has no problem saying that her husband is Chinese American. It easily explains the surname without any issues.

And really, it's none of your business what my family chooses to do. So, please, just MYOB.

[Anonymous]

I think women should pick any name they want, just like anybody else, without reference to anybody else’s biases, prejudiced or preconceived notions.

[Anonymous]

I am an "ethnic" woman who has an ethnic name. The first time I ran across this, it caught my attention because it seemed discordant, I guess? But now, I am really glad it's happening. The way to make ethnic names more common is just that - make them more common. That said, I took my husband's Anglo name when we married, and man is that easier. So an extra thanks to those of you taking on the "unusual" name.

[Anonymous]

I didn't change my name because we had to travel immediately after our wedding and lived in a state that required extra steps to do certain formats of name changes with a marriage license. I wish I had.

My last name is one that sounds very "white people here since the 17th century" and on paper is a a totally straightforward WASP-y surname. I never experienced mispronunciations or misspellings with it until well into my 30s. Now my name is constantly mangled, mispronounced, and misspelled.

My DH's name is one of the most generic Chinese-American names. I use his for restaurant reservations, at our kid's school, and a million other places. When I use DH's name I enjoy the privilege of having a name that everyone can pronounce and spell. No one blinks, but I live in an area where "mismatched" names are pretty common. Once in a while at hotels or school he is called Mr. MyLastName, and we both get a kick out of that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:]
You're weird

Reawakening an idiotic Zombie thread is weird.

OP is gone. Stop replying

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ethnic men are here to claim the White Women who refuse to settle for the entitled, low quality man children this country is producing these days. Jesus Rodriguez and Pajeet Ramanaganarara are here to take your jerbs and your women.

Doing the dirty jobs native born Americans won't!

[Anonymous]

I'm madly in love with that bending robot and I want his name and all his baby sprockets.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get the vitriole directed at OP. I know a Jane Very Bland Last Name who took her husband’s last name just to stand out a bit. Had nothing to do with tradition.

I have never seen hyphenated last names or giving ‘ethnic’ first names to the kids. That indicates to me which direction the family wants to go.

I know an Asian/white American family whose kids have very traditional Asian first names that they go by.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is it bad form for a lily-white American woman who marries a man with an obviously Latino/Asian/Middle Eastern-sounding name to change to her husband's name or should she keep her own (anglo-American) surname? Of course some women today prefer keeping their maiden names anyway.

I don't know why, but something just rubs me as cultural appropriation or faking diversity when someone like Larla Jones gets married and becomes Larla Rodriguez, Larla Zhang, or Larla Al-Habib. It's like pretending not to be white.

As it is custom in North America for women to change their last names, or assume their husband’s last name, it is up to the woman.

Are you as bothered by “ethnic” women adopting the last name Smith or Jones?

[Anonymous]

Well, how do you know the surname of the white woman wasn't shortened to Chang from Changstein?

[Anonymous]

When a lily-white American woman doesn’t take her “ethnic” (….are joking OP?) husband’s name, depending on who she is, I wonder if she is worried about being mistaken for “an ethnic”.

“I don’t care for….*sniffs* ethnic food.” - you sound like one of these people, btw.

Gross

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Question for OP - are you ok with brown women changing their names to white surnames?

This right here. Can't "contaminate" white women ya know.