What would you really like to tell your spouse or partner but can't or won't?
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Anonymous
| We're never going to make $100k. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
Are you living with my husband? Is it possible he has two houses and two families? |
Anonymous
Yes, he knew about it and that I was working on recovery. I told him about some relapses but not all. What helped me the most was a combination of cognitive behavioral therapy (literally changing the way I thought about food), overeaters anonymous meetings (even though it was a different manifestation it was the same underlying issue and those meetings were lifesaving. Some even focus just on EDs), and then really just time passing and having kids helped me to get past it. I basically lost the black and white thinking and started challenging any thoughts I had that contributed to the cycle. For me, it was an addiction. My dh was quite a rock during it all. Once I had substantial recovery, and he knew that, I couldn't bring myself to share the relapses. It's been almost 6 years now though. |
Anonymous
+1000 |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
What's crazy is that I never asked about her number, she volunteered the information and then volunteered a different number some years later. Same as finding out about how endowed one of those guys was compared to me. I didn't ask because it's something I absolutely did not want to know. She volunteered that information as well. She tends to speak without thinking. A lot. |
Anonymous
| That her obsessive focus on the numbers on the scale is fucking stupid -- a heavier, strong body is sexier than a body which merely contains less mass. |
Anonymous
+1 BTDT. I have to agree with this. |
Anonymous
You have a good attitude! Tell her this please, she probably just doesn't realize for some reason. |
Anonymous
+1000. I haven't been there or done that but I'm also smart enough to figure out that of course AP is going to be more attractive and satisfying that DH or DW. You see each other when you're at your best with none of the real life issues that plague a married couple. It's like dating was when you and your spouse were single. They looked good too back then before the issues of real life got in the way. A friend told me years ago that dating was all tits and weenies, and marriage was all ear wax and nose hair. With AP's you get the tits and weenies without the ear wax and nose hair. |
Anonymous
|
Yes, those jeans DO make you look fat.
You've gained 40 pounds, so guess what? You ARE fat! |
Anonymous
OK, but at some point, it does make a difference. Not 5 or 10 or perhaps even 20 pounds, but at some point even "lights off and wine" don't help. This goes for the ladies too, from what I am gathering in the thread above. |
Anonymous
DH here. This a great thread (really). I am inspired to lose some weight and be a bit more forceful (manly?) with my wife, for her own benefit. I haven't exactly been a push over, and I don't whine, but its clear that -- for physical attraction, at least -- women are looking more for Christian Grey than for Steve Martin. |
Anonymous
How much time have you got? Suffice it to say I managed to maintain a relationship in spite of their lifelong emotional abuse because I wanted my child to have grandparents and because after growing up in such a terrible household I actually didn't understand just how far from acceptable their behavior had been. After years of therapy I had a perspective on that, and most people were encouraging me to cut them out entirely before they struck again. Unfortunately they were even more damaging as grandparents, which is hard to believe. |