First date sex

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why doesn't anyone care about OP's update?? She updated!

The fact that he called back doesn't really prove anything. Calling back for more sex? Most definitely.

Well, going back the the original post she asked:

"Slept with him on the first date. I hope he calls again or did sleeping together so quickly just screw up those chances?"

So the original question wasn't about whether he'd consider her marriage material, just whether he'd call back. Like you say, she banged him on night one so unless she was lousy it was a foregone conclusion he'd call back when he wanted more.

Whether he'll consider marrying her was a question never asked by OP, nor one we'll all ever get the answer to.

[Anonymous]

I'll grant you that in certain more creative professions artists, actors, musicians, models (heh-heh) etc., these standards are more or less ignored. It may be that the responses here are skewed along choice of profession.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A healthy attitude is recognizing people aren't defined by when they choose to have sex. You are welcome to call women "easy," but understand I'll assume you have serious hang ups.

Like I said, you're free to ignore the realities of society or claim that they're not so. But they are. Whether you like it or not.

If you sleep with a man of the first date it colors his opinion of you in a certain way. More often than not, it won't be positive. Close your eyes and stomp your feet all you want.

There are plenty of people who that wouldn't be the case- namely, not assholes...
but keep buying into the judgmental crap and saying it is gospel

Let's just say that as a younger man many of my friends occasionally banged someone on the first date. Never once did I hear any of them talk about how much they respected them, nor did they pursue serious relationships with them. (Now on cue go ahead and tell me how my friends were all pigs, but they are in fact just regular guys who went on to have families and careers.)

Now, if a woman is just interested in a roll in the hay or casual fling, sure, why not? But if you're looking at someone as a potential long term mate, then don't screw him on night one. He WILL see you differently. I guarantee. it.

....or better yet, have loads of casual sex on a first date anf then make the "hubby to be" wait a good long time.

He'll feel wonderful about you.

Until he finds out about your, GASP, past behavior.

NP here. GASP. No. Because as he gets to actually know you, revealing your past isn't bad, it just a part of who you are. You were sampling on industrial food before--but the guy you want to marry is a slice of grass fed filet broiled to perfection--why gobble it all down in one night?

[Anonymous]

Why is everyone so obsessed with when other people start having sex? I don't understand the mean comments. Are you people angry that someone isn't playing by your sex rules? Angry someone else is getting laid?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone so obsessed with when other people start having sex? I don't understand the mean comments. Are you people angry that someone isn't playing by your sex rules? Angry someone else is getting laid?

Bitter men and women angry at women usurping the patriarchy by not buying into antiquated rules or allowing themselves to be shamed for enjoying sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone so obsessed with when other people start having sex? I don't understand the mean comments. Are you people angry that someone isn't playing by your sex rules? Angry someone else is getting laid?

Bitter men and women angry at women usurping the patriarchy by not buying into antiquated rules or allowing themselves to be shamed for enjoying sex.

Pretty much. It's odd. I don't get angry at those who wait until after seven dates or wait until marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone so obsessed with when other people start having sex? I don't understand the mean comments. Are you people angry that someone isn't playing by your sex rules? Angry someone else is getting laid?

Bitter men and women angry at women usurping the patriarchy by not buying into antiquated rules or allowing themselves to be shamed for enjoying sex.

Pretty much. It's odd. I don't get angry at those who wait until after seven dates or wait until marriage.

I don't think it's shaming or anger exactly. The basic question being asked is, would a man think less of a woman who slept with someone on a first date? The answer is, for some people, yes. Because it represents a different view of what sex means to some people. Like a PP said, for some it's an act of intimacy with a special person, for some it just an act of satisfaction with another person.

Some claim bullshit but it is what it is. It's not right or wrong. It's just reality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone so obsessed with when other people start having sex? I don't understand the mean comments. Are you people angry that someone isn't playing by your sex rules? Angry someone else is getting laid?

Bitter men and women angry at women usurping the patriarchy by not buying into antiquated rules or allowing themselves to be shamed for enjoying sex.

Pretty much. It's odd. I don't get angry at those who wait until after seven dates or wait until marriage.

I don't think it's shaming or anger exactly. The basic question being asked is, would a man think less of a woman who slept with someone on a first date? The answer is, for some people, yes. Because it represents a different view of what sex means to some people. Like a PP said, for some it's an act of intimacy with a special person, for some it just an act of satisfaction with another person.

Some claim bullshit but it is what it is. It's not right or wrong. It's just reality.

I see your overall point, but you can't deny that there are some downright rude and angry posters here who feel that they are 100% in the right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I see your overall point, but you can't deny that there are some downright rude and angry posters here who feel that they are 100% in the right.

Well, it is DCUM. Snap judgments and hostility are the norm, unfortunately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone so obsessed with when other people start having sex? I don't understand the mean comments. Are you people angry that someone isn't playing by your sex rules? Angry someone else is getting laid?

Bitter men and women angry at women usurping the patriarchy by not buying into antiquated rules or allowing themselves to be shamed for enjoying sex.

Pretty much. It's odd. I don't get angry at those who wait until after seven dates or wait until marriage.

I don't think it's shaming or anger exactly. The basic question being asked is, would a man think less of a woman who slept with someone on a first date? The answer is, for some people, yes. Because it represents a different view of what sex means to some people. Like a PP said, for some it's an act of intimacy with a special person, for some it just an act of satisfaction with another person.

Some claim bullshit but it is what it is. It's not right or wrong. It's just reality.

But I think a lot of peoples point is, that it can be both. It is not all or nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A healthy attitude is recognizing people aren't defined by when they choose to have sex. You are welcome to call women "easy," but understand I'll assume you have serious hang ups.

Like I said, you're free to ignore the realities of society or claim that they're not so. But they are. Whether you like it or not.

If you sleep with a man of the first date it colors his opinion of you in a certain way. More often than not, it won't be positive. Close your eyes and stomp your feet all you want.

There are plenty of people who that wouldn't be the case- namely, not assholes...
but keep buying into the judgmental crap and saying it is gospel

Let's just say that as a younger man many of my friends occasionally banged someone on the first date. Never once did I hear any of them talk about how much they respected them, nor did they pursue serious relationships with them. (Now on cue go ahead and tell me how my friends were all pigs, but they are in fact just regular guys who went on to have families and careers.)

Now, if a woman is just interested in a roll in the hay or casual fling, sure, why not? But if you're looking at someone as a potential long term mate, then don't screw him on night one. He WILL see you differently. I guarantee. it.

....or better yet, have loads of casual sex on a first date anf then make the "hubby to be" wait a good long time.

He'll feel wonderful about you.

Until he finds out about your, GASP, past behavior.

NP here. GASP. No. Because as he gets to actually know you, revealing your past isn't bad, it just a part of who you are. You were sampling on industrial food before--but the guy you want to marry is a slice of grass fed filet broiled to perfection--why gobble it all down in one night?

DOUBLE GASP!

Why would I, the "grass fed filet broiled to perfection" EVER want to end up with a wife who spent her sexual past "sampling on industrial food" before I came along?

On what planet do you think this makes any sense?

What self respecting guy would ever ever ever feel good about that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP here. GASP. No. Because as he gets to actually know you, revealing your past isn't bad, it just a part of who you are. You were sampling on industrial food before--but the guy you want to marry is a slice of grass fed filet broiled to perfection--why gobble it all down in one night?

Well, isn't "who you are" important? And if "who you are" is someone who had sex with 30 guys before age 25 then "who you are" just might not be what a particular person is looking for.

Again, it's no one's business but your own who you want to sleep with, or how many dudes you want to sleep with, or how quickly you sleep with them. But other potential partners WILL use this info to decide "who you are." Some won't care, some will think you're a slut and dismiss you.

Not sure why this is even a point of contention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A healthy at



titude is recognizing people aren't defined by when they choose to have sex. You are welcome to call women "easy," but understand I'll assume you have serious hang ups.

Like I said, you're free to ignore the realities of society or claim that they're not so. But they are. Whether you like it or not.

If you sleep with a man of the first date it colors his opinion of you in a certain way. More often than not, it won't be positive. Close your eyes and stomp your feet all you want.

There are plenty of people who that wouldn't be the case- namely, not assholes...
but keep buying into the judgmental crap and saying it is gospel

Let's just say that as a younger man many of my friends occasionally banged someone on the first date. Never once did I hear any of them talk about how much they respected them, nor did they pursue serious relationships with them. (Now on cue go ahead and tell me how my friends were all pigs, but they are in fact just regular guys who went on to have families and careers.)

Now, if a woman is just interested in a roll in the hay or casual fling, sure, why not? But if you're looking at someone as a potential long term mate, then don't screw him on night one. He WILL see you differently. I guarantee. it.

....or better yet, have loads of casual sex on a first date anf then make the "hubby to be" wait a good long time.

He'll feel wonderful about you.

Until he finds out about your, GASP, past behavior.

NP here. GASP. No. Because as he gets to actually know you, revealing your past isn't bad, it just a part of who you are. You were sampling on industrial food before--but the guy you want to marry is a slice of grass fed filet broiled to perfection--why gobble it all down in one night?

DOUBLE GASP!

Why would I, the "grass fed filet broiled to perfection" EVER want to end up with a wife who spent her sexual past "sampling on industrial food" before I came along?

On what planet do you think this makes any sense?

What self respecting guy would ever ever ever feel good about that?

LOL what a loser you are.

Don't be jealous because your lady can get laid more than you

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't be jealous because your lady can get laid more than you

I think most women can get laid more than most men if they choose to. There's little distinction in that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't be jealous because your lady can get laid more than you

I think most women can get laid more than most men if they choose to. There's little distinction in that.

Right, lucky us