If you had an abortion you really didn't want to have

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Disgusting. I would not support the murder of a baby.

We sit silently while innocent children are slaughtered and then wonder why people have no respect for human life when someone beats up an old person or runs over a child and keeps driving.

Stop patting yourself on the back OP. You are a terrible friend and a sorry excuse for a human being.

When I see a post like this, I feel many emotions. Mostly I'm just thankful I'm not so stupid and closed minded. Good luck with your future, weirdo child-like person who thinks life is black and white.

Yes, I am closed-minded to the idea of killing babies.

A society that has no respect for the most innocent of lives is a very dangerous society.

+1000

So do you also condemn those who do IVF?

Pro-life poster, why do you keep avoiding this question? Did you yourself murder babies as part of the cost of getting the family you thought you deserved?

I'm pro life and don't consider that abortion. I guess we all have our own comfort level. Personally, I'm ok with the day/week after pill too.

So 0-7 days of life is fine. But 8 days? No, that's sacred. Seriously?

The decision to become a parent is HUGE. Would you ever want to be *forced* into adopting an unwanted baby?

12:02 again. No one forces anyone to adopt so I'm not sure where you are coming from with this. If anything, parents who wish to adopt wait a LONG time b/c there are, seemingly, not enough! And I did adopt one with special needs and our next one will have special needs too, and we are still waiting a LONG time, so don't tell me I just wasn't open to kids with special needs or some such thing.

It sounds as though you are ready to adopt unconditionally - you will accept and love the baby no matter what. FES, genetic issues, HIV infected, drug addicted...you will love and raise that child regardless.

In all fairness, do you think that all adoptive parents would accept such challenges? Or would the pool of such adoptive parents be fairly small and maybe not even available for some special needs babies..

Thank you. But you are in fact giving me more credit than is due. When you are adopting, you are allowed -- ENCOURAGED -- to consider which special needs you are open to and which you are not. For example, the special need our child has -- we said, "Yeah, we could do that. It's expensive, it'll take years (prob up to 18 or so) to work on, but we personally can do it." There were other SNs, however, we said, "You know what, we really couldn't." For example, we live in a townhouse with a lot of steps. So, we said, "You know what, we really couldn't realistically have a child who is in a wheelchair. NO harm no foul, but that just wouldn' work that well." SO, you can "pick and choose" (for lack of a better term) after a good deal of reflection, which would work for your family. It probably is different for everyone. Some people's medical insurance may cover this but it may not cover that. Some people say, "RAD is no big deal but I could never do cerebral palsy.:" Some people say, "I can do cerebral palsy but RAD scares the heck out of me." ETC.

So, in a long-winded answer to your question: adoptive parents (us included) do not have to be saints to accept blindly whatever comes along. But, yes, I must admit, I do think that my DH and I WERE more open to certain things, and hey, when you are biologically having a child, you have to be open to some sort of unexpected news anyway, so that is how we always looked at it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is off topic- but I'm curious as to what the adoptive moms think is the problem if there are over 100,000 kids in the foster system classified as "awaiting adoption" and there is a apparently a pool of parents eagerly awaiting them.

I am curious why you hold adoptive parents to a higher standard than parents who have not adopted As I said in a prior post, I have adopted one and am waiting for another. If you care to throw stones, why have you not adopted any from the foster system? What are YOU doing to address this situation, other than posting about it on the internet?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pro-life troll, please answer. Do you feel the same way about the baby killing bitches doing IVF?

NP. And please tell us how you feel about the baby-killing bitches like me who have terminated ectopic pregnancies.

Another pro-life poster. Aborting an ectopic pregnancy is nothing like aborting a normal healthy pregnancy. Do you honestly believe that pro-lifers would view it the same way?

Yes. Or is it "justifiable murder?" Either you're taking a life, or you're not. Or you're saying it's ok to take a life when x or y happens, but not z. You hypocrites.

The embryo in an ectopic pregnancy has NO CHANCE OF SURVIVAL. Do you really think pro-lifers are that stupid?

Er, yes they are. Plenty of pro-lifers want ectopic pregnancies to take their natural course. The health of the mother is of no consequence.

Liar. You're full of shit. I don't believe you have ever heard a pro-life person anywhere say that.

Yes, there are a number of pro-life people who believe that abortion should be prohibited under all circumstances, even ectopic pregnancy. I've included links in case you want to see for yourself. From the website of American Right to Life:

"Abortion has so hardened the heart of the medical community that no thought is given to the unborn child who is growing outside of the uterus. While government and medical industry websites claim that the baby cannot survive ectopic pregnancy, in truth, hundreds of such babies are reported as surviving abdominal, ovarian, and tubal ectopic pregnancies. For the documentation of these babies wonderful survival, see the impeccably referenced meta study: Ectopic Personhood, by Bill Fortenberry. In situ and even by transplant to the uterus (as documented below), the ectopic child often can survive. In so many cases though, the child will die and so might the mother unless a physician intervenes. Those who desire to justify abortion claim that such a complication proves their point because proper medical treatment for an ectopic pregnancy requires the intentional killing of the embryo. As demonstrated extensively by a number of medical studies, by Fortenberry, and uniquely, below, this is not true. But consider their motivation and the form of their argument." http://americanrtl.org/life-of-the-mother-exception

From Bill Fortenberry's article on the Personhood Initiative website:

"As we can see, ectopic pregnancies are not necessarily fatal for either the mother or the child. The mother’s survival is almost certain, and the survival of the child is at least possible if not probable. Dr. Koop was correct. The personhood of the unborn child does not conflict with the need to protect the life of the mother for the simple reason that abortion is never necessary for that protection. There are other solutions available. More than one obstetrician has recommended that women with ectopic pregnancies should be placed under the constant vigil of a well equipped hospital until their children have developed enough to be delivered alive rather than sacrificed unnecessarily.[34] Ectopic pregnancies can be survived, and we can prohibit all abortions without any exceptions." http://www.personhoodinitiative.com/ectopic-personhood.html

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"There are seemingly not enough!"

Are you serious with this? There are thousands of children awaiting homes. There just may not be enough pretty, non-disabled, white babies for you. I promise that if you want to adopt, there are foster children who would be placed in a hot minute. Don't ask me to incubate for you.

You don't have to incubate for ME. You do have to incubate for the child whom you have created, yes. I am pro-choice up to the moment of conception and then, after that, the choice has been made and, from there, you have a choice to keep the child and make an adoption plan. I am pro all either of these choices.

I don't think you understand what pro-choice means.

Ahh, but I do. With freedom comes responsibility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is off topic- but I'm curious as to what the adoptive moms think is the problem if there are over 100,000 kids in the foster system classified as "awaiting adoption" and there is a apparently a pool of parents eagerly awaiting them.

I am curious why you hold adoptive parents to a higher standard than parents who have not adopted As I said in a prior post, I have adopted one and am waiting for another. If you care to throw stones, why have you not adopted any from the foster system? What are YOU doing to address this situation, other than posting about it on the internet?

I'm not attacking you - I'm geniunely curious. If there's something we need to be doing to fix the foster system to get these kids homes, I'll be the first one to join a lobbying effort.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is off topic- but I'm curious as to what the adoptive moms think is the problem if there are over 100,000 kids in the foster system classified as "awaiting adoption" and there is a apparently a pool of parents eagerly awaiting them.

I am curious why you hold adoptive parents to a higher standard than parents who have not adopted As I said in a prior post, I have adopted one and am waiting for another. If you care to throw stones, why have you not adopted any from the foster system? What are YOU doing to address this situation, other than posting about it on the internet?

I'm not attacking you - I'm geniunely curious. If there's something we need to be doing to fix the foster system to get these kids homes, I'll be the first one to join a lobbying effort.

Encourage more adoptions. Call up an adoption or foster agency and say that you are willing to help and what can you do. Seriously consider adopting yourself and encourage others to do also. Follow political things which affect adoption (adoption tax credit, for example) and support those.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is off topic- but I'm curious as to what the adoptive moms think is the problem if there are over 100,000 kids in the foster system classified as "awaiting adoption" and there is a apparently a pool of parents eagerly awaiting them.

I am curious why you hold adoptive parents to a higher standard than parents who have not adopted As I said in a prior post, I have adopted one and am waiting for another. If you care to throw stones, why have you not adopted any from the foster system? What are YOU doing to address this situation, other than posting about it on the internet?

I'm not attacking you - I'm geniunely curious. If there's something we need to be doing to fix the foster system to get these kids homes, I'll be the first one to join a lobbying effort.

Encourage more adoptions. Call up an adoption or foster agency and say that you are willing to help and what can you do. Seriously consider adopting yourself and encourage others to do also. Follow political things which affect adoption (adoption tax credit, for example) and support those.

See, to me, this suggests that the problem really is on the "supply" end - that there are too many children already in the system, and that we need to incentivize adoption to help. Doesn't that suggest that we shouldn't be adding more unwanted children to the mix?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is off topic- but I'm curious as to what the adoptive moms think is the problem if there are over 100,000 kids in the foster system classified as "awaiting adoption" and there is a apparently a pool of parents eagerly awaiting them.

I am curious why you hold adoptive parents to a higher standard than parents who have not adopted As I said in a prior post, I have adopted one and am waiting for another. If you care to throw stones, why have you not adopted any from the foster system? What are YOU doing to address this situation, other than posting about it on the internet?

I'm not attacking you - I'm geniunely curious. If there's something we need to be doing to fix the foster system to get these kids homes, I'll be the first one to join a lobbying effort.

Encourage more adoptions. Call up an adoption or foster agency and say that you are willing to help and what can you do. Seriously consider adopting yourself and encourage others to do also. Follow political things which affect adoption (adoption tax credit, for example) and support those.

Give to adoption agencies. The Barker Foundation, for example, has numerous fundraisers and I always see lists of benefactors in their quarterly newsletters. (I am only mentioning Barker b/c that is where we go but I am sure that all agencies have similar set-ups this way.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is off topic- but I'm curious as to what the adoptive moms think is the problem if there are over 100,000 kids in the foster system classified as "awaiting adoption" and there is a apparently a pool of parents eagerly awaiting them.

I am curious why you hold adoptive parents to a higher standard than parents who have not adopted As I said in a prior post, I have adopted one and am waiting for another. If you care to throw stones, why have you not adopted any from the foster system? What are YOU doing to address this situation, other than posting about it on the internet?

I'm not attacking you - I'm geniunely curious. If there's something we need to be doing to fix the foster system to get these kids homes, I'll be the first one to join a lobbying effort.

Encourage more adoptions. Call up an adoption or foster agency and say that you are willing to help and what can you do. Seriously consider adopting yourself and encourage others to do also. Follow political things which affect adoption (adoption tax credit, for example) and support those.

See, to me, this suggests that the problem really is on the "supply" end - that there are too many children already in the system, and that we need to incentivize adoption to help. Doesn't that suggest that we shouldn't be adding more unwanted children to the mix?

I don't know 100%. Call up an adoption agency or foster agency and ask what they think can be done to help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is off topic- but I'm curious as to what the adoptive moms think is the problem if there are over 100,000 kids in the foster system classified as "awaiting adoption" and there is a apparently a pool of parents eagerly awaiting them.

I am curious why you hold adoptive parents to a higher standard than parents who have not adopted As I said in a prior post, I have adopted one and am waiting for another. If you care to throw stones, why have you not adopted any from the foster system? What are YOU doing to address this situation, other than posting about it on the internet?

I'm not attacking you - I'm geniunely curious. If there's something we need to be doing to fix the foster system to get these kids homes, I'll be the first one to join a lobbying effort.

Encourage more adoptions. Call up an adoption or foster agency and say that you are willing to help and what can you do. Seriously consider adopting yourself and encourage others to do also. Follow political things which affect adoption (adoption tax credit, for example) and support those.

See, to me, this suggests that the problem really is on the "supply" end - that there are too many children already in the system, and that we need to incentivize adoption to help. Doesn't that suggest that we shouldn't be adding more unwanted children to the mix?

I don't know 100%. Call up an adoption agency or foster agency and ask what they think can be done to help.

Say you are an able body and willing mind and ready to help and I am sure they will have about 4000 suggestions for you, and will happily put you to work!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today my friend who had an abortion says she wished her "support" person had made some effort to talk her out of it. There were other options.

She and a lot of people. Her voice won't drown out the extreme voices on either side. These women suffer silently and when she talks about it, it will be taboo. Her pro life friends will drown her with crap about Jesus and her pro choice friends will trivialize her feelings. Those with good professional experience like some OBs can understand. The pain is immense and she will never stop thinking about her child, her little friend, who only she knew.
The extreme views make it hard for any logic to come into this. In the end there are women who are being hurt by a system that refuses to be intellectually honest. There IS post abortion stress, no different than PTSD. And for some women, that is not worth it, they would have rather struggled with the child than live through that. And these are NOT religious people, they are just humans with normal emotions.

OP here. This is the category my friend falls into. She has always considered herself pro-choice but didn't think she could ever have an abortion personally. Then she got pregnant at a very inopportune time in an exceedingly bad relationship and health situation, and she made the choice that would spare the child a lifetime of difficulty. It was heartbreaking for her, and I doubt she will ever forget about the little life that was inside of her. There was another young woman in the waiting room who was also there to have an abortion. She started chatting with me while my friend was in the back. She was perfectly upbeat and it was pretty clear that this was just like any other doctor's appointment for her, she was just bummed that her boyfriend couldn't get off work so they could go to Five Guys after. There seems to be a huge range of feelings women have about this procedure. It doesn't do anyone any favors to diminish or hyperbolize the degree to which something like this can weigh on a person.

Why didn't she consider adoption?

Yeah. I am the 12:02 poster. Why DIDN'T she consider adoption? Why don't MORE women in this situation consider adoption? I am an adoptive mom of one, waiting on #2, and wonder this CONSTANTLY!!!!

She didn't consider adoption because there is a huge difference between abandoning a live infant you have carried and loved for 9 months and ending a 5 week pregnancy. She has always wanted children and continues to want children, but the circumstances made it impossible for her to give that child the stable life it deserved. Just because she accidentally got pregnant doesn't mean she has to carry a baby to term and give it away to someone like you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"There are seemingly not enough!"

Are you serious with this? There are thousands of children awaiting homes. There just may not be enough pretty, non-disabled, white babies for you. I promise that if you want to adopt, there are foster children who would be placed in a hot minute. Don't ask me to incubate for you.

You don't have to incubate for ME. You do have to incubate for the child whom you have created, yes. I am pro-choice up to the moment of conception and then, after that, the choice has been made and, from there, you have a choice to keep the child and make an adoption plan. I am pro all either of these choices.

I don't think you understand what pro-choice means.

So you would never do IVF, either, correct?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"There are seemingly not enough!"

Are you serious with this? There are thousands of children awaiting homes. There just may not be enough pretty, non-disabled, white babies for you. I promise that if you want to adopt, there are foster children who would be placed in a hot minute. Don't ask me to incubate for you.

You don't have to incubate for ME. You do have to incubate for the child whom you have created, yes. I am pro-choice up to the moment of conception and then, after that, the choice has been made and, from there, you have a choice to keep the child and make an adoption plan. I am pro all either of these choices.

I don't think you understand what pro-choice means.

So you would never do IVF, either, correct?

(That was directed at pro-choice to moment of conception poster)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Disgusting. I would not support the murder of a baby.

We sit silently while innocent children are slaughtered and then wonder why people have no respect for human life when someone beats up an old person or runs over a child and keeps driving.

Stop patting yourself on the back OP. You are a terrible friend and a sorry excuse for a human being.

When I see a post like this, I feel many emotions. Mostly I'm just thankful I'm not so stupid and closed minded. Good luck with your future, weirdo child-like person who thinks life is black and white.

Yes, I am closed-minded to the idea of killing babies.

A society that has no respect for the most innocent of lives is a very dangerous society.

+1000

So do you also condemn those who do IVF?

Pro-life poster, why do you keep avoiding this question? Did you yourself murder babies as part of the cost of getting the family you thought you deserved?

I'm pro life and don't consider that abortion. I guess we all have our own comfort level. Personally, I'm ok with the day/week after pill too.

So 0-7 days of life is fine. But 8 days? No, that's sacred. Seriously?

The decision to become a parent is HUGE. Would you ever want to be *forced* into adopting an unwanted baby?

12:02 again. No one forces anyone to adopt so I'm not sure where you are coming from with this. If anything, parents who wish to adopt wait a LONG time b/c there are, seemingly, not enough! And I did adopt one with special needs and our next one will have special needs too, and we are still waiting a LONG time, so don't tell me I just wasn't open to kids with special needs or some such thing.

It sounds as though you are ready to adopt unconditionally - you will accept and love the baby no matter what. FES, genetic issues, HIV infected, drug addicted...you will love and raise that child regardless.

In all fairness, do you think that all adoptive parents would accept such challenges? Or would the pool of such adoptive parents be fairly small and maybe not even available for some special needs babies..

Thank you. But you are in fact giving me more credit than is due. When you are adopting, you are allowed -- ENCOURAGED -- to consider which special needs you are open to and which you are not. For example, the special need our child has -- we said, "Yeah, we could do that. It's expensive, it'll take years (prob up to 18 or so) to work on, but we personally can do it." There were other SNs, however, we said, "You know what, we really couldn't." For example, we live in a townhouse with a lot of steps. So, we said, "You know what, we really couldn't realistically have a child who is in a wheelchair. NO harm no foul, but that just wouldn' work that well." SO, you can "pick and choose" (for lack of a better term) after a good deal of reflection, which would work for your family. It probably is different for everyone. Some people's medical insurance may cover this but it may not cover that. Some people say, "RAD is no big deal but I could never do cerebral palsy.:" Some people say, "I can do cerebral palsy but RAD scares the heck out of me." ETC.

So, in a long-winded answer to your question: adoptive parents (us included) do not have to be saints to accept blindly whatever comes along. But, yes, I must admit, I do think that my DH and I WERE more open to certain things, and hey, when you are biologically having a child, you have to be open to some sort of unexpected news anyway, so that is how we always looked at it.

Then in all fairness it is not as simple as the pregnant mom choosing an adoptive family for her baby. Her baby also has to be a good fit for the adoptive family, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"There are seemingly not enough!"

Are you serious with this? There are thousands of children awaiting homes. There just may not be enough pretty, non-disabled, white babies for you. I promise that if you want to adopt, there are foster children who would be placed in a hot minute. Don't ask me to incubate for you.

You don't have to incubate for ME. You do have to incubate for the child whom you have created, yes. I am pro-choice up to the moment of conception and then, after that, the choice has been made and, from there, you have a choice to keep the child and make an adoption plan. I am pro all either of these choices.

I don't think you understand what pro-choice means.

So you would never do IVF, either, correct?

(That was directed at pro-choice to moment of conception poster)

You are losing track of your posters. I (pp) am the poster (from 12:02) who said that we did IVF but accounted for every embryo. Full explanation at 12:02.