DH’s therapist refused to talk to our marriage therapist

[Anonymous]

OP, it doesn't sound like the marriage counseling has been all that transformative. It also sounds like your DH is not 100% invested. What are you going to do in light of those 2 facts?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We only saw individual therapists who every 3rd time looped in the spouse.

Otherwise there is no accountability and a total waste of time and big money.

This is especially needed when mental disorders and maladaptive coping mechanisms are on display by unhealthy person.

What are you talking about? When an adult participates in *individual* therapy, they don't have to account to their spouse, neither does the therapist. We're not talking about a child, we are discussing an adult who can protect themselves and decide what they share with who.

There’s no accountability as in the dysfunctional person can make up and omit whatever they want over and over again.

That is between the therapist and the client. Skilled therapists look for non verbal cues as well as look at the client's appearance. You can tell a lot just by looking. Further, liars have difficulty sticking to a story and details get changed. Op isn't taking notes while he talks, but his therapist definitely is.
Another possibility is that dh entered therapy with the hope and intention of improving his life and how he feels. He might be the most accurate reporter his therapist has met. Perhaps that's why she put her reputation on the line to protect his privacy.

[Anonymous]

Narcs have Flying Monkey “therapists” in their back pocket. Just like their fake persona at work

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We only saw individual therapists who every 3rd time looped in the spouse.

Otherwise there is no accountability and a total waste of time and big money.

This is especially needed when mental disorders and maladaptive coping mechanisms are on display by unhealthy person.

What are you talking about? When an adult participates in *individual* therapy, they don't have to account to their spouse, neither does the therapist. We're not talking about a child, we are discussing an adult who can protect themselves and decide what they share with who.

There’s no accountability as in the dysfunctional person can make up and omit whatever they want over and over again.

That is between the therapist and the client. Skilled therapists look for non verbal cues as well as look at the client's appearance. You can tell a lot just by looking. Further, liars have difficulty sticking to a story and details get changed. Op isn't taking notes while he talks, but his therapist definitely is.
Another possibility is that dh entered therapy with the hope and intention of improving his life and how he feels. He might be the most accurate reporter his therapist has met. Perhaps that's why she put her reputation on the line to protect his privacy.

Abusers enter therapy as a theater for their made up narrative and to blame others for their misbehavior. They know exactly what to say and not say, to play the victim.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We only saw individual therapists who every 3rd time looped in the spouse.

Otherwise there is no accountability and a total waste of time and big money.

This is especially needed when mental disorders and maladaptive coping mechanisms are on display by unhealthy person.

What are you talking about? When an adult participates in *individual* therapy, they don't have to account to their spouse, neither does the therapist. We're not talking about a child, we are discussing an adult who can protect themselves and decide what they share with who.

There’s no accountability as in the dysfunctional person can make up and omit whatever they want over and over again.

That is between the therapist and the client. Skilled therapists look for non verbal cues as well as look at the client's appearance. You can tell a lot just by looking. Further, liars have difficulty sticking to a story and details get changed. Op isn't taking notes while he talks, but his therapist definitely is.
Another possibility is that dh entered therapy with the hope and intention of improving his life and how he feels. He might be the most accurate reporter his therapist has met. Perhaps that's why she put her reputation on the line to protect his privacy.

Lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stop going to the marriage therapist and put that time/money/energy towards a mediator.

+1

Most psychologists would have abandoned this case for one’s they could actually help. Only those with no client book would keep a deadweight patient treading water, clocking in the fees.

Cut bait Op, especially if there is nothing to show for it.

[Anonymous]

I have never known a man willing to go to therapy for six years who is not in serious trouble.

OP, what is his diagnosis?

[Anonymous]

It is hard to believe this is a real thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, it doesn't sound like the marriage counseling has been all that transformative. It also sounds like your DH is not 100% invested. What are you going to do in light of those 2 facts?

+1 million

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have never known a man willing to go to therapy for six years who is not in serious trouble.

OP, what is his diagnosis?

Six years of fooling the therapist with Poor Me Syndrome is like gold to a narcissist!

It’s also like $15k a year of net income. Wasted