What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?

[Anonymous]

"You don't look like a Scientist. You look like you should be working on Wall Street!"

[Anonymous]

When I started my career all of my peers were Ivy League type MBAs. I wasn’t. After three years I was the first one to reach a director level and a senior guy said to me “you’ve done really well given where you went to school.” About 3 years later he was reporting to me and I took the high road and said nothing.

[Anonymous]

My paralegal could do it better but it's fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Has anyone ever given you a pearl necklace? You're cute and I'd give you a pearl necklace." I was 18 and assisting an investment broker at a new defunct brokerage firm. Used to have a bull as its logo.

That was creepy af

[Anonymous]

After graduating from a highly selective college at the top of my class, I took an entry level position to gain experience and move up. A senior manager in my department heard me answering the phone and said, “Wow, you were made for this job.”

[Anonymous]

After receiving a promotion and it was announced at the last meeting I'd have with the group, one said, "Well, clearly you had ambitions" and another said, "I had no idea" just sort of looking at me in shock.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:After receiving a promotion and it was announced at the last meeting I'd have with the group, one said, "Well, clearly you had ambitions" and another said, "I had no idea" just sort of looking at me in shock.

They may have been thinking about themselves more than you. Perhaps you made their work easier and they are going to miss you for that.

[Anonymous]

I can be nice when I want to be

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:“You’re so articulate” as if they were surprised I’m not a total idiot

Are you black?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“You’re so articulate” as if they were surprised I’m not a total idiot

Are you black?

+1. This is a typical microagression said to people of color generally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“You’re so articulate” as if they were surprised I’m not a total idiot

This doesn’t sound like a back handed compliment to me. This is just a compliment.

It's a microaggression.

It actually literally is not.

[Anonymous]

“I love your enthusiasm but I don’t think it’s going to solve the problem.”

I made sure his problem was not solvable after that comment.

[Anonymous]

"you have the mind of a ferrari in the body of a volvo" or something to that effect. Said to me by another (older) woman when I was about 32 and a size 2/4. It was just so...odd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't know YOU were an attorney! You're so friendly...

This one isn’t wrong.

- another friendly attorney that feels like a push over for being nice (I’m not a pushover at all, just not mean and biting.)

Same here. I just let people (including other attorneys) say what they want to say about me being too nice but that I’m "learning" to be mean. Whatever. I’m nice and still get siht done. It is possible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When visiting the Charleston, SC office…

“Do you work here? I think you probably came from our DC office.”

I look like DC. Sad face.