Why would my ex do this? Mother’s Day.
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Anonymous
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My xH and I divorced a little over a year ago. While we were married, he did nothing for Mother’s Day, ever. He knew I wanted some sort of acknowledgment but refused to do anything. We divorced after I discovered he was cheating on me for the third time.
Today he texted asking if he can swing by on Sunday to drop off Mother’s Day gifts for me. I do not want Mother’s Day gifts from him. I do not want much of anything to do with him outside of kid logistics. WHY on earth would he get me gifts? Our DD is too young to even understand what Mother’s Day is, so it’s not like he’s doing it for her. And I certainly won’t be getting him Father’s Day gifts. He did the same thing this past Christmas. Has never gotten me a Christmas gift, but randomly showed up with a giant bag of my favorite candy and remarked “I know you’re trying to get in shape, but I wanted to get you this for Christmas”. I’m seriously thinking of telling him I don’t want the gifts. |
Anonymous
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I hate when people do this. I have an ex like that (no kids) who drops off gifts that are unwelcome. He doesn’t mail them, he likes the power of stalking and sits outside the house for a while.
It’s a shame you have to waste time on Mother’s Day entertaining him. Can you just tell him to drop them off at door? |
Anonymous
| Just say no. You are divorced and under no obligation to entertain nonsense like this. |
Anonymous
| I'd be tempted to reply "LOL, good one!" But probably better to say thank you, that's a kind thought but not necessary and I can't stay home and wait, I don't know my exact plans. |
Anonymous
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What a complete moron. You can tell him that his gifts are several years too late, and that now you don't want them.
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Anonymous
| Tell him to drop it off on your porch or whatever. |
Anonymous
No, don't do this. This is clearly a manipulation tactic. If it were genuine, he would simply take the kids to the store and have them pick something out and bring it home without having to say anything to the OP. |
Anonymous
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Just be mindful that he's also dropping off gifts for his girlfriends. The man is a pathetic attention-seeker. You were not interesting as his wife, because he already had your attention. But anyone who isn't already his is a target for him to acquire.
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Anonymous
| No, tell him you don't want him showing up, nor do you want any gifts. If he sent flowers, that would be thoughtful and unobtrusive because he is not burdening you with his presence. He is choosing to show up, sabotage your diet and make stupid quips, what a jerk. |
Anonymous
He's being a jerk. But why would you marry and have a kid with a guy who never got you a Christmas gift?! (Never mind cheated on you three times). |
Anonymous
| It’s control. Your instinct to stay far far away is correct. Just ignore that text and do your thing. |
Anonymous
| Ooh I love the idea of just ignoring his text. That will drive him nuts. |
Anonymous
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Mine did that too. Divorced 18 because of his cheating. Didn't get me anything the last 3 years of marriage for bday, vday, anniversary, xmas.
On my bday a few months ago he left my favorite ice cream and a framed picture of me and my best friend on my porch and texted me to not let the treat melt??? He's also been sending back my portion of the kids activity money that we agreed to split. I sent him $750 last week and he sent it back with a note "I can cover it, hope that's helpful to you" |
Anonymous
18 months ago** |
Anonymous
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No one knows what he means but him. Don’t ask him what he means. If he wanted to say something he would.
But still, open your heart and consider it as a gesture of goodwill as any gift from someone is. Don’t be too excited, rather remain coolly polite and continue to keep your distance. Let him keep showing you that he has changed and has become more thoughtful, loving, attentive so that you may be able to reconcile one day. |