Funeral Shock - Infidelity or Something Else?

[Anonymous]

A friend of my mother recently passed away unexpectedly and suddenly. She had been married to the same man for almost 50 years and was around 70 years of age. Dated her husband since high school etc.

At the burial, after all the guests had left, an unfamiliar man approached her husband and claimed he had been having a secret affair with the woman for years. To say the husband was shocked was an understatement. He is retired and almost all time was spent together with his wife. There were no trips, calls, texts etc that would have ever made him suspicious. When he questioned my mom about whether she knew anything, she was adamant that there is no way this woman would ever have cheated - besides being very religious, she regularly told my mom how she was very happily married and in still in love after all this time. I understand that she could have been living a double life, but have a hard time imagining this plump grandmother engaging in extracurricular marital activities (but who knows?!). The husband had checked the wife's phone and there were no suspicious texts, calls or contacts that made the man's claims seem legitimate.

I find it odd that an AP would confront a husband at a burial when the whole thing was shrouded in secrecy. Then again, it is possible. Aside from this, has anyone ever heard of a person making false claims against a stranger at their funeral or causing pain unnecessarily to get back at someone for a business transaction or for another reason I can't think of?

The whole thing is just so weird.

[Anonymous]

Fake

[Anonymous]

He's a mentally ill person who probably stalks all the funerals of women of a certain age, and goes up to the surviving husband to say that.

No actual affair partner would do this, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He's a mentally ill person who probably stalks all the funerals of women of a certain age, and goes up to the surviving husband to say that.

No actual affair partner would do this, OP.

You clearly don’t know APs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's a mentally ill person who probably stalks all the funerals of women of a certain age, and goes up to the surviving husband to say that.

No actual affair partner would do this, OP.

You clearly don’t know APs

Stop trolling.

[Anonymous]

I would have died on that hill, up until the millisecond before my ex randomly confessed to multiple hookups. I never suspected a thing. Why would I have? Like your mom’s friend, my husband was home like clockwork. Never spent time on his phone, or doing anything in secret. Yet somehow, he had sneaked in YEARS of affairs. They find a way, and spouses (myself included) are blind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have died on that hill, up until the millisecond before my ex randomly confessed to multiple hookups. I never suspected a thing. Why would I have? Like your mom’s friend, my husband was home like clockwork. Never spent time on his phone, or doing anything in secret. Yet somehow, he had sneaked in YEARS of affairs. They find a way, and spouses (myself included) are blind.

Sigh. Your ex wouldn't have attended the funeral of one of his partners to break the news to her husband while in the midst of his grief.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have died on that hill, up until the millisecond before my ex randomly confessed to multiple hookups. I never suspected a thing. Why would I have? Like your mom’s friend, my husband was home like clockwork. Never spent time on his phone, or doing anything in secret. Yet somehow, he had sneaked in YEARS of affairs. They find a way, and spouses (myself included) are blind.

I’m sorry, that’s terrible. I can’t understand why he had to confess it when he went to such lengths to hide it. Better to have just said he felt you’d grown apart than put you through that pain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have died on that hill, up until the millisecond before my ex randomly confessed to multiple hookups. I never suspected a thing. Why would I have? Like your mom’s friend, my husband was home like clockwork. Never spent time on his phone, or doing anything in secret. Yet somehow, he had sneaked in YEARS of affairs. They find a way, and spouses (myself included) are blind.

Yep, same. I would have bet my house or my life or even my kids lives my husband wasn't cheating

[Anonymous]

If not true (and honestly even if it is), what a terrible thing to do.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like the beginning of a scam.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have died on that hill, up until the millisecond before my ex randomly confessed to multiple hookups. I never suspected a thing. Why would I have? Like your mom’s friend, my husband was home like clockwork. Never spent time on his phone, or doing anything in secret. Yet somehow, he had sneaked in YEARS of affairs. They find a way, and spouses (myself included) are blind.

To be honest, when it comes to being clever and discrete in covering up extramarital affairs, women are usually far better at covering things up, than men.

This is plausible.

[Anonymous]

He should have just kept his mouth shut. What a weird thing to say.

After my grandpa died, someone told us he had AIDs. It was kind of a bombshell and only my dad and I know. I'd never bring it up with my grandma. So many questions about how he'd get AIDs (he was married to grandma for 45 years) and whether it was true. Some things are best left unsaid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He should have just kept his mouth shut. What a weird thing to say.

After my grandpa died, someone told us he had AIDs. It was kind of a bombshell and only my dad and I know. I'd never bring it up with my grandma. So many questions about how he'd get AIDs (he was married to grandma for 45 years) and whether it was true. Some things are best left unsaid.

Wait - so it turned out to be true?

[Anonymous]

A bunch of women showed up to a funeral for one of my male relatives claiming to be his wife and asking for death certificates. The answer is no if that’s what he is after.