Not hearing from a physically independent parent for 2 days is a blessing

[Anonymous]

Dad is spry for his age but very infantile and dependent emotionally. Told him it was a super busy week for me, he was still texting me with mundane stuff which of course I had to tolerate but haven’t heard from him for 2 days and suddenly realized what a blessing it was to not have to think about him for a little while!
I am sure he is fine, just wanted to share and maybe someone can relate. He has been a widower for 4 years now and it’s frankly become a bit much re: his presence even though he is a good man!

[Anonymous]

OP - It sounds like you are a caring daughter, but setting limits which are reasonable in your relationship with your dad. The best you can do is to encourage him to do things he enjoys and that keep him healthy. Dynamics may change over time, but now it sounds appropriate. Setting a rhythm for contact that works for both will help both of you enjoy special times together.

[Anonymous]

Are you the same person who is literally cleaning her father's home and cooking his meals?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you the same person who is literally cleaning her father's home and cooking his meals?

He has a cleaning lady and he makes simple meals himself (so idk what you’re referring to) but he wants to text every day.
This is progress after he was calling everyday (on FaceTime, with camera on).
I can’t say “dad please just don’t text”.
He doesn’t need anything physically.
I just am amazed by how annoyed I was by his constant presence so to speak.
The poster who talks about encouraging him to do things, he does them but still keeps texting and texting with mundane stuff. Like maybe 2-3x a day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you the same person who is literally cleaning her father's home and cooking his meals?

He has a cleaning lady and he makes simple meals himself (so idk what you’re referring to) but he wants to text every day.
This is progress after he was calling everyday (on FaceTime, with camera on).
I can’t say “dad please just don’t text”.
He doesn’t need anything physically.
I just am amazed by how annoyed I was by his constant presence so to speak.
The poster who talks about encouraging him to do things, he does them but still keeps texting and texting with mundane stuff. Like maybe 2-3x a day.

I’d trade with you in a heartbeat. Are you really this cold and selfish?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you the same person who is literally cleaning her father's home and cooking his meals?

He has a cleaning lady and he makes simple meals himself (so idk what you’re referring to) but he wants to text every day.
This is progress after he was calling everyday (on FaceTime, with camera on).
I can’t say “dad please just don’t text”.
He doesn’t need anything physically.
I just am amazed by how annoyed I was by his constant presence so to speak.
The poster who talks about encouraging him to do things, he does them but still keeps texting and texting with mundane stuff. Like maybe 2-3x a day.

I’d trade with you in a heartbeat. Are you really this cold and selfish?

Idk what’s wrong with me but he has everything he needs and nothing to do and it just drives me up the wall!

[Anonymous]

You will miss him terribly when he is gone, and you will regret this post.

[Anonymous]

You are fine and it's good to vent! I hear you! It's like you have to be "ON" all the time! The people who say "you'll miss him terribly" and "will regret this post" are the ones who text/call their adult kids 2-3x a day.

[Anonymous]

Um

Are you sure he's ok?

Maybe you should ask a neighbor to look in on him and make sure he isn't hurt?

[Anonymous]

Is he bored? lonely? If he is, consider independent living for the social life.

[Anonymous]

Wow, the hatefulness here is unbelievable.

[Anonymous]

To OP ^^^^

[Anonymous]

Perhaps he’ll outlive you OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are fine and it's good to vent! I hear you! It's like you have to be "ON" all the time! The people who say "you'll miss him terribly" and "will regret this post" are the ones who text/call their adult kids 2-3x a day.

Yes, it’s like with a kid, you are always on, what is he asking, what does he need, why is he talking about Minecraft all day lol
He texted me today he had a quick question to discuss and whether it’s better to do it today or tomorrow. Omg if it can wait it should wait! But I was too pissed already so I said go ahead. The question was about an $10 charge. Ong I just can’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Um

Are you sure he's ok?

Maybe you should ask a neighbor to look in on him and make sure he isn't hurt?

He’s fine, he just broke my bliss and texted me earlier today.