I’m tired of my exchange student talking about how easy school is here and how dumb the American kids are.
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Anonymous
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He’s from Germany. He 17 and has quite an ego. His English is formal, but excellent and he also speaks German and Spanish fluently.
He’s not taking any math or science classes while he’s here because he doesn’t like those subjects. He comes home from school every day telling me how the Americans can’t read, don’t know geography, history etc. I’m really tired of hearing it. Help me survive this until June! |
Anonymous
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It's probably true.
Maybe go take him to see more of this country than just the inside of a school. Teens can be dumb, even him, though he doesn't realize it. |
Anonymous
He is right 1/3 of this country is stupid it is called the cult of MAGA stupids. How do you not understand this? We have a country of idiots singing confederacy songs still and NAZI criminals running the government. |
Anonymous
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You just say "you know, I'm glad you're finding school to be easy for you but it's starting to really irritate me that you come home every day and insult your peers. Can we keep our conversations about school a little more positive, or at least focused on problems we need to solve?"
IMO this is part of your job in loco parentis. |
Anonymous
| Public school lit and history leaves a lot to be desired unless it's AP classes. How can he not take any math or science. And why did he come? Geography education is non existent here that's true. |
Anonymous
| Do you want a list of books/movies/other texts about America you can volunteer to assign him as supplemental? You could have family discussion groups! This is not a joke. |
Anonymous
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He’s actually correct. An American high school diploma won’t even get you admitted into a German university. I know this because I am German. In fact I’m currently in Germany—OT though.
Anyway, he shouldn’t be an a$$ about it though. It’s possible that he doesn’t know he’s annoying you and is just making conversation. So tell him. Germans are also very direct and frank, and it’s really not considered insulting if it’s true. So maybe help him out and let him know that Americans take a much softer approach to everything in person. You’re the adult, lead and/or parent. Or call his parents and ask them to talk to him. |
Anonymous
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He's probably on the spectrum - smart, but socially inept. If you want to, you can address that with him, and say: "I can see you're intelligent and above average, even for a German high schooler. But socially, I'd like to remind you of the rules of etiquette. It's not done, here or in any other country, to repeatedly criticize people. You've already told me how American students are behind academically multiple times, so I don't need to hear this anymore. And going forward, applying rules of social etiquette will help you with your professional and private relationships."
Cast it in the form of "social rules" and in light of his future interests, and he will understand it better. I have close relatives on the spectrum - being direct but neutral helps them a lot. FYI... I lived in the UK, France and Germany as a child, and went to high school in a private international school in Paris. The average American student IS behind the average continental European student!!! It's true  But it doesn't mean it should be said.
My kids went to/still attend good public high schools, and they were or still are in all AP/advanced tracks, which puts them below my high school level in writing and the Humanities, but higher in STEM and math. |
Anonymous
| He’s not wrong. |
Anonymous
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Math and Science are the hard subjects. Why doesn't he have to take those?!
What history class did they put him in? AP US History would be my pick. Obviously AP Euro would be easier for him. |
Anonymous
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"I'm glad you're finding school to be easy, hopefully you're making good connections too. Remind me again what you hoped for in living abroad?"
Culturally, this could also be his way of indirectly saying he's homesick or not making friends. Or he could just be a dick. |
Anonymous
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I remember the joke I heard a German say about various behaviors which could be thought to be on the spectrum.
But instead they were stereotypically German. |
Anonymous
| I'm not sure about his particular classes in Germany, but normally they already have different tracks for smart and vocational students. If he's taking academic courses and not vocational, he likely doesn't see the dumber kids. |
Anonymous
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Germans are very direct. One of many reasons why my kid on the spectrum loved Germany and might do grad school there.
Acknowledge that his educational system is superior in some ways, but ask him what he sees that some German kids would benefit from. He might have to set aside his prejudices and observe his peers for a while. |
Anonymous
This |