Do you give visting family a "tour" of your home?
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Anonymous
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Over the holidays we unexpectedly had some members of DH's extended family come to our house for the first time (we've lived here for 14 years). From the second they walked into the house (two separate arrival times), MIL kept telling me to give them a tour. I ignored her as much as I could and was successful with the first group that arrived, but then she started up again when the second group got there, and it just became awkward so I caved. We live in a nice home, but it is not some sort of palatial estate. We have an open floor plan. If you stand in our family room and do a 360, then walk 10 paces to the half bathroom - you've seen the whole first floor. I didn't offer to take them into bedrooms, but we went to the basement, which is largely a space for our kids minus one room. Generally I felt very silly walking them around and I'm sure it showed.
Unless I'd signed up to be a show house on a home tour, it would never cross my mind that someone would be interesting in "touring" our house. It feels pretentious to suggest they would, but am I off base? |
Anonymous
| You can see our whole first floor from the front door and no one is allowed in the bedrooms or basement because they're a mess, so no. |
Anonymous
Did I write this? Same thing here. |
Anonymous
| Sure, we have 900 square feet. You can see it all easily. |
Anonymous
| No, but I once had an autistic cousin start going up our stairs to the second floor. His mom told him that wasn't appropriate and to come down. |
Anonymous
| Yes, we have always done this with visiting family and they give us a tour when we visit them for the first time. It’s always been the same whether in a 1 br apt or big house. I also think it’s perfectly normal/ understandable not to do this - mil was weird for insisting. |
Anonymous
| Well, you could skip the East Wing… |
Anonymous
Same – people are curious. And when an area is a mess, I will keep the door closed and say that. It's weird to insist, but not weird to ask. |
Anonymous
| Who is curious about a house their relatives live in so much they ned a tour. This is very MC. |
Anonymous
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I point out where they'll be sleeping (assuming overnight guests), where the bathrooms are (one on the main level, one in the basement), and where to find things in the kitchen. By then, we've basically seen the whole house except the bedrooms, which I leave closed off.
Just stopping by for a couple hours? No, no tour. I might say something like "let's go sit in the living room", and by the time we get there, they've seen the whole main level. But I do remember being tasked as a young kid to give tours of our house to guests, so I think it is something that was common in prior generations. |
Anonymous
That's just ridiculous. It's always rude to ask for a tour. A homeowner can suggest a tour, of course, but that is super weird. Like, do they think their house is museum-worthy that their guests would want a tour? No. I'm not interested in your home. |
Anonymous
| Maybe its a generational thing. My parents always did this when I was growing up. Now it doesn't really feel like a normal thing to do. |
Anonymous
No, some people are not curious. You've got to drill that into your thick head. I do not want to shuffle after you, oohing and aahing, while we walk about your very bland home. There are nosy people of course. Maybe those need even less of a glimpse of your home. Otherwise you'll find them rooting around in the drawers, like my aunt does at my mother's house. |
Anonymous
Same. Growing up, it was expected and normal to give tours of your house to visitors. Grew up in the south. I don’t see it as much up here. |
Anonymous
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No. |