Crippling worry
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Anonymous
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As I’ve gotten older, I’ve noticed an uptick in how much I worry. And by worry I mean losing sleep and constant knot in my stomach. Cannot stop ruminating about what’s going to happen—especially with my children, but also just generally.Living in a constant state of dread or worry and just trying to get through each day. Not a lot of joy in my life and rarely seem to get a “win” moment. Is this my new middle age normal? What have others who’ve experienced similar done? I’m honestly considering medication but have no idea how to go about that and I’ve always tried to avoid medication.
For context, my children are in high school and college. Relationship with spouse is limping along. Job is just a paycheck and I’ve had zero luck finding something new and more fulfilling. Friends all seem to be busy with their own families and careers. No family nearby. |
Anonymous
| It's called anxiety and you need to treat it. |
Anonymous
| You sound like you have untreated depression and anxiety. See your PCP. |
Anonymous
| Life should not feel that awful. Talk to your PCP about medication and get some recommendations for therapists who specialize in treating anxiety. Both have helped me tremendously. |
Anonymous
Thanks. Op here and I agree it’s anxiety/depression. I guess my actual question is whether there are other options vs medication? I tried the medication route years ago and ending up bailing because the side effects sucked so much. And then insurance wouldn’t cover the one drug that seemed to help so I just gave up. I’ve seen therapists at various points, but I didn’t find them particularly helpful. Money is tight (and that’s one of the things I worry about) so I don’t have endless resources to find the right therapist, paying $250 a pop. So, while I have not ruled out going back to medication, I’m also looking for other coping strategies. |
Anonymous
| Do they make non addictive anxiety medication? |
Anonymous
| Op, I have been helped by two supplements. Magnesium L Threonate. I take it before bedtime. I also sometimes take SAM-E. SAM-E helps me feel less weighed down. |
Anonymous
Anxiety/depression are a common symptom in perimenopause as hormones shift, and if you have a prior history it’s almost certain and often worse. Yes, you can absolutely manage it without psych meds - I’ve been doing so for years. It takes concerted focus on the kind of healthy living that promotes brain health in general - anti inflammatory diet, avoid alcohol, limit sugar, get more than adequate sleep, move your body and work on strength, get sunlight early morning or use a lightbox to stimulate melatonin production naturally and improve sleep/mood, manage stress by mindfulness or other techniques because cortisol spikes are the enemy of positive mood. Therapy or journaling or some other outlet for processing feelings and thoughts that lead to rumination. |
Anonymous
All of that sounds pretty normal. You could do medication, and it might make you feel better, but it wouldn't change how awful everything is. |
Anonymous
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Have you tried this? You can get a very small dose.
https://www.mayoclinic.org/drugs-supplements/venlafaxine-oral-route/description/drg-20067379 |
Anonymous
| Are you drinking alcohol? |
Anonymous
| You really need to find a qualified therapist that can also prescribe you an antidepressant. Be warned though-weight gain is unfortunately a side effect. |
Anonymous
+1. Alcohol can numb the misery if you drink enough of it. That's why they sell wine in boxes. |
Anonymous
| I would try some simple life changes: Great sleep, no alcohol, more emphasis on whole foods, serious physical activity. Doing all this, especially running, has quieted my anxiety immensely though it still shows up at times. |
Anonymous
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You could try Ashwaganda for rumination. Magneisium glycinate 400mg a day
Also, get your vitamin D and B levels checked. Low levels can lead to depression and anxiety. CBD oil can help with anxiety. If you are waking up in the middle of the night regularly, focus on getting better sleep. Sleep can have a tremendous impact on your mood. Sleep cocktail (take an hour before bedtime) 200-300 Mag Glycinate 800 Ashwaganda 1 capsule Alpha Gaba PM ( this is a supplement), if needed Find things that bring you joy - maybe its music, a walk, sunlight in your eyes in the morning, etc. When you find yourself ruminating, go write it down, then tear up the paper. Getting it on paper will sometimes get it out of your mind. Consider HRT. Good Luck,OP! |