There are a lot of single women looking

[Anonymous]

I am (47) recently divorced and finally checked out the apps for the first time. I am interested in women 37 and older. I was very surprised by the huge number of single women in this age bracket. Of course, it doesn't mean I am who they are looking for and it's probably more likely than I am not. But I went through a lot of well put together profiles and I am just surprised all these women are single. Yes there are probably more women than men in this age group, but it's as if all of them are single.

If I were to lower my age range to 30, it's probably going to be a similar story. But 10 years age gap is the most I'll go for as I am looking beyond just hooking up.

So guys out there who are single and looking, you have choices.

[Anonymous]

Yes there are because while a man who is say 35 can have up to 3 quality women to choose from, the same cannot be said for women. And I say this as guy who recently got married. I am 38 and I have more friends that are single than married. For most of them their current girlfriends or the ones they have dated in the past have or have had better career than them.

Men drop out of the dating market if they are not happy in their career. Unfortunately we see a very disturbing trend among men between 30 and 45. They are chronically underemployed, have substance abuse issues, and in poor physical and mental shape
And they have significantly less friends than men their peers in the past. Career satisfaction is really important for a man's ego. If he feels that he has been a failure career wise, he is very unlikely to enter the dating market. So women are waiting for men that don't exist today and that will probably not exist tomorrow either.

I think a lot of women will sadly end up single forever. Not because they are picky or not trying hard enough, but because there are simply not enough qiality men to choose from.

Now I am sure you have taken stats 101, so.if you are the exception I am not talking about you. You are an outlier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am (47) recently divorced and finally checked out the apps for the first time. I am interested in women 37 and older. I was very surprised by the huge number of single women in this age bracket. Of course, it doesn't mean I am who they are looking for and it's probably more likely than I am not. But I went through a lot of well put together profiles and I am just surprised all these women are single. Yes there are probably more women than men in this age group, but it's as if all of them are single.

If I were to lower my age range to 30, it's probably going to be a similar story. But 10 years age gap is the most I'll go for as I am looking beyond just hooking up.

So guys out there who are single and looking, you have choices.

Speaking as a fellow divorced guy, you're missing the reason why these women are single: Higher standards. Women don't see being single the way they did back when you were last on the market.

20 years ago, a woman single in her 30s and 40s would settle for some guy she wasn't particularly attracted to and knew she was going to end up divorcing. The goal was just to get a marriage under the belt because "divorced" at 40 was better than never married at 40.

Nowadays, women are happy to stay single the rest of their lives rather than settle. This is triply true for women who are divorced. A lot of them hated being married and living with a man, and need a really, really, really good offer to consider going back to it.

So, while there are a lot of single women on the market, your chances are probably worse nowadays than they were 20 years ago. The lady who is going to want to get serious and actually stay with you isn't going to be as hot, smart, or emotionally stable as the one who would've wanted you 20 years ago. The woman you think is ideal will break up with you after three to six months today, if she even shows up to date #2.

I'm not going to give my take on whether women's standards today make sense or if the problem is men or whatever. Just laying out the scene.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes there are because while a man who is say 35 can have up to 3 quality women to choose from, the same cannot be said for women. And I say this as guy who recently got married. I am 38 and I have more friends that are single than married. For most of them their current girlfriends or the ones they have dated in the past have or have had better career than them.

Men drop out of the dating market if they are not happy in their career. Unfortunately we see a very disturbing trend among men between 30 and 45. They are chronically underemployed, have substance abuse issues, and in poor physical and mental shape
And they have significantly less friends than men their peers in the past. Career satisfaction is really important for a man's ego. If he feels that he has been a failure career wise, he is very unlikely to enter the dating market. So women are waiting for men that don't exist today and that will probably not exist tomorrow either.

I think a lot of women will sadly end up single forever. Not because they are picky or not trying hard enough, but because there are simply not enough qiality men to choose from.

Now I am sure you have taken stats 101, so.if you are the exception I am not talking about you. You are an outlier.

It's funny that as I'm reading this, I'm wishing I was one of those ladies who never got married. Marriage sucks badly for women. Like really badly. I was so much better off emotionally, financially, in every way before I let DH put a ring on it and suck the joy from me. The marriage rate is going to get a lot lower because there's just very little in it for a woman who has her shit together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am (47) recently divorced and finally checked out the apps for the first time. I am interested in women 37 and older. I was very surprised by the huge number of single women in this age bracket. Of course, it doesn't mean I am who they are looking for and it's probably more likely than I am not. But I went through a lot of well put together profiles and I am just surprised all these women are single. Yes there are probably more women than men in this age group, but it's as if all of them are single.

If I were to lower my age range to 30, it's probably going to be a similar story. But 10 years age gap is the most I'll go for as I am looking beyond just hooking up.

So guys out there who are single and looking, you have choices.

Speaking as a fellow divorced guy, you're missing the reason why these women are single: Higher standards. Women don't see being single the way they did back when you were last on the market.

20 years ago, a woman single in her 30s and 40s would settle for some guy she wasn't particularly attracted to and knew she was going to end up divorcing. The goal was just to get a marriage under the belt because "divorced" at 40 was better than never married at 40.

Nowadays, women are happy to stay single the rest of their lives rather than settle. This is triply true for women who are divorced. A lot of them hated being married and living with a man, and need a really, really, really good offer to consider going back to it.

So, while there are a lot of single women on the market, your chances are probably worse nowadays than they were 20 years ago. The lady who is going to want to get serious and actually stay with you isn't going to be as hot, smart, or emotionally stable as the one who would've wanted you 20 years ago. The woman you think is ideal will break up with you after three to six months today, if she even shows up to date #2.

I'm not going to give my take on whether women's standards today make sense or if the problem is men or whatever. Just laying out the scene.

OP here. Thanks for making excellent points. In fact I am talking to a woman who is 41 and I picked up many of the points that you made. At first I thought it's because I have been out of the market for 22 years, but then I realized the expectations are just not the same anymore. I don't have an opinion whether it's good or bad, but I am finding the journey interesting. This woman I'm taking to she is gorgeous. She has never been married, she has no kids, she owns her house and has a great career. I think she is talking to me just out of interest because she told me straight out that she wants to experience what my first wife experienced (all the milestones etc) and she rightfully said she won't be able to experience that with a divorced man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes there are because while a man who is say 35 can have up to 3 quality women to choose from, the same cannot be said for women. And I say this as guy who recently got married. I am 38 and I have more friends that are single than married. For most of them their current girlfriends or the ones they have dated in the past have or have had better career than them.

Men drop out of the dating market if they are not happy in their career. Unfortunately we see a very disturbing trend among men between 30 and 45. They are chronically underemployed, have substance abuse issues, and in poor physical and mental shape
And they have significantly less friends than men their peers in the past. Career satisfaction is really important for a man's ego. If he feels that he has been a failure career wise, he is very unlikely to enter the dating market. So women are waiting for men that don't exist today and that will probably not exist tomorrow either.

I think a lot of women will sadly end up single forever. Not because they are picky or not trying hard enough, but because there are simply not enough qiality men to choose from.

Now I am sure you have taken stats 101, so.if you are the exception I am not talking about you. You are an outlier.

It's funny that as I'm reading this, I'm wishing I was one of those ladies who never got married. Marriage sucks badly for women. Like really badly. I was so much better off emotionally, financially, in every way before I let DH put a ring on it and suck the joy from me. The marriage rate is going to get a lot lower because there's just very little in it for a woman who has her shit together.

Ill probably surprised some of you with my comments but you are right. We have a daughter who is in college. While I think myself as a great husband, I am aware of my shortcomings. And if my daughter's choice is to marry a man like me she is better of staying single. I say this because after many years I now realize how much DW has been the one keeping the marriage alive. There are fantastic husbands our there who put in equal efforts, but I don't know if they are the majority though.

[Anonymous]

It is the classic hypergamy. Women do not care about men’s struggles. They wait at the finish line and pick the winner.

If you're a decent looking guy, make a lot of money, be kind to others, and have interesting hobbies such as car racing, play guitar, pickleball etc... you will have endless options with online dating. Congratulation, you are in the top 5%. It is like 95% of women chasing the top 5% men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is the classic hypergamy. Women do not care about men’s struggles. They wait at the finish line and pick the winner.

If you're a decent looking guy, make a lot of money, be kind to others, and have interesting hobbies such as car racing, play guitar, pickleball etc... you will have endless options with online dating. Congratulation, you are in the top 5%. It is like 95% of women chasing the top 5% men.

What's stopping you from improving your looks, working hard, fixing your stank personality, and developing interests beyond porn?

And why exactly should a random woman who's not your mom care about your struggles? You write that as if you've been wronged somehow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes there are because while a man who is say 35 can have up to 3 quality women to choose from, the same cannot be said for women. And I say this as guy who recently got married. I am 38 and I have more friends that are single than married. For most of them their current girlfriends or the ones they have dated in the past have or have had better career than them.

Men drop out of the dating market if they are not happy in their career. Unfortunately we see a very disturbing trend among men between 30 and 45. They are chronically underemployed, have substance abuse issues, and in poor physical and mental shape
And they have significantly less friends than men their peers in the past. Career satisfaction is really important for a man's ego. If he feels that he has been a failure career wise, he is very unlikely to enter the dating market. So women are waiting for men that don't exist today and that will probably not exist tomorrow either.

I think a lot of women will sadly end up single forever. Not because they are picky or not trying hard enough, but because there are simply not enough qiality men to choose from.

Now I am sure you have taken stats 101, so.if you are the exception I am not talking about you. You are an outlier.

It's funny that as I'm reading this, I'm wishing I was one of those ladies who never got married. Marriage sucks badly for women. Like really badly. I was so much better off emotionally, financially, in every way before I let DH put a ring on it and suck the joy from me. The marriage rate is going to get a lot lower because there's just very little in it for a woman who has her shit together.

Ill probably surprised some of you with my comments but you are right. We have a daughter who is in college. While I think myself as a great husband, I am aware of my shortcomings. And if my daughter's choice is to marry a man like me she is better of staying single. I say this because after many years I now realize how much DW has been the one keeping the marriage alive. There are fantastic husbands our there who put in equal efforts, but I don't know if they are the majority though.

So, you're aware that you're a shitty husband dragging down the team, but you have no intention of doing anything beyond continuing as you have. How do men like you feel no shame? It's a serious question because my ex was a shamelessly selfish idiot too and I always thought to myself that if I were him, my conscience wouldn't let me be such a user. But he felt perfectly good about himself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes there are because while a man who is say 35 can have up to 3 quality women to choose from, the same cannot be said for women. And I say this as guy who recently got married. I am 38 and I have more friends that are single than married. For most of them their current girlfriends or the ones they have dated in the past have or have had better career than them.

Men drop out of the dating market if they are not happy in their career. Unfortunately we see a very disturbing trend among men between 30 and 45. They are chronically underemployed, have substance abuse issues, and in poor physical and mental shape
And they have significantly less friends than men their peers in the past. Career satisfaction is really important for a man's ego. If he feels that he has been a failure career wise, he is very unlikely to enter the dating market. So women are waiting for men that don't exist today and that will probably not exist tomorrow either.

I think a lot of women will sadly end up single forever. Not because they are picky or not trying hard enough, but because there are simply not enough qiality men to choose from.

Now I am sure you have taken stats 101, so.if you are the exception I am not talking about you. You are an outlier.

It's funny that as I'm reading this, I'm wishing I was one of those ladies who never got married. Marriage sucks badly for women. Like really badly. I was so much better off emotionally, financially, in every way before I let DH put a ring on it and suck the joy from me. The marriage rate is going to get a lot lower because there's just very little in it for a woman who has her shit together.

If you don't want kids, this is likely true. But if you do want kids and manage to find a guy who will be an involved father (they're out there) then there's something to be said for marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is the classic hypergamy. Women do not care about men’s struggles. They wait at the finish line and pick the winner.

If you're a decent looking guy, make a lot of money, be kind to others, and have interesting hobbies such as car racing, play guitar, pickleball etc... you will have endless options with online dating. Congratulation, you are in the top 5%. It is like 95% of women chasing the top 5% men.

Well if you are one those men that you described them you will attract women to the kind of status that you are trying to project..and these kind of women are not good for anyone. They will drop you the minute your status is gone....

So I frankly don't believe in this top XYZ BS. I was never a "high value" man. I was always a regular guy. And the women who accepted to be wife could have asked any "high value man" to marry her and they would have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am (47) recently divorced and finally checked out the apps for the first time. I am interested in women 37 and older. I was very surprised by the huge number of single women in this age bracket. Of course, it doesn't mean I am who they are looking for and it's probably more likely than I am not. But I went through a lot of well put together profiles and I am just surprised all these women are single. Yes there are probably more women than men in this age group, but it's as if all of them are single.

If I were to lower my age range to 30, it's probably going to be a similar story. But 10 years age gap is the most I'll go for as I am looking beyond just hooking up.

So guys out there who are single and looking, you have choices.

Speaking as a fellow divorced guy, you're missing the reason why these women are single: Higher standards. Women don't see being single the way they did back when you were last on the market.

20 years ago, a woman single in her 30s and 40s would settle for some guy she wasn't particularly attracted to and knew she was going to end up divorcing. The goal was just to get a marriage under the belt because "divorced" at 40 was better than never married at 40.

Nowadays, women are happy to stay single the rest of their lives rather than settle. This is triply true for women who are divorced. A lot of them hated being married and living with a man, and need a really, really, really good offer to consider going back to it.

So, while there are a lot of single women on the market, your chances are probably worse nowadays than they were 20 years ago. The lady who is going to want to get serious and actually stay with you isn't going to be as hot, smart, or emotionally stable as the one who would've wanted you 20 years ago. The woman you think is ideal will break up with you after three to six months today, if she even shows up to date #2.

I'm not going to give my take on whether women's standards today make sense or if the problem is men or whatever. Just laying out the scene.

OP here. Thanks for making excellent points. In fact I am talking to a woman who is 41 and I picked up many of the points that you made. At first I thought it's because I have been out of the market for 22 years, but then I realized the expectations are just not the same anymore. I don't have an opinion whether it's good or bad, but I am finding the journey interesting. This woman I'm taking to she is gorgeous. She has never been married, she has no kids, she owns her house and has a great career. I think she is talking to me just out of interest because she told me straight out that she wants to experience what my first wife experienced (all the milestones etc) and she rightfully said she won't be able to experience that with a divorced man.

Yep, that's what I'm talking about. 20 years ago, she'd have taken a twice divorced dad of 10 kids just to get married ASAP and she'dve stuck with him. Now? If she ever decides to get hitched, big IF there, then she'll pop out a kid in a hurry. After that, she'll start giving the guy a side eye. Countdown to the divorce. A couple of years tops. What she really wanted was the experience and the kid, and then back to her freedom. Seen it over and over. Not saying it's good or bad. Just saying times have changed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes there are because while a man who is say 35 can have up to 3 quality women to choose from, the same cannot be said for women. And I say this as guy who recently got married. I am 38 and I have more friends that are single than married. For most of them their current girlfriends or the ones they have dated in the past have or have had better career than them.

Men drop out of the dating market if they are not happy in their career. Unfortunately we see a very disturbing trend among men between 30 and 45. They are chronically underemployed, have substance abuse issues, and in poor physical and mental shape
And they have significantly less friends than men their peers in the past. Career satisfaction is really important for a man's ego. If he feels that he has been a failure career wise, he is very unlikely to enter the dating market. So women are waiting for men that don't exist today and that will probably not exist tomorrow either.

I think a lot of women will sadly end up single forever. Not because they are picky or not trying hard enough, but because there are simply not enough qiality men to choose from.

Now I am sure you have taken stats 101, so.if you are the exception I am not talking about you. You are an outlier.

It's funny that as I'm reading this, I'm wishing I was one of those ladies who never got married. Marriage sucks badly for women. Like really badly. I was so much better off emotionally, financially, in every way before I let DH put a ring on it and suck the joy from me. The marriage rate is going to get a lot lower because there's just very little in it for a woman who has her shit together.

Ill probably surprised some of you with my comments but you are right. We have a daughter who is in college. While I think myself as a great husband, I am aware of my shortcomings. And if my daughter's choice is to marry a man like me she is better of staying single. I say this because after many years I now realize how much DW has been the one keeping the marriage alive. There are fantastic husbands our there who put in equal efforts, but I don't know if they are the majority though.

So, you're aware that you're a shitty husband dragging down the team, but you have no intention of doing anything beyond continuing as you have. How do men like you feel no shame? It's a serious question because my ex was a shamelessly selfish idiot too and I always thought to myself that if I were him, my conscience wouldn't let me be such a user. But he felt perfectly good about himself.

Calm down lady. You have a lot anger in you. He was self reflecting and is probably doing the work and realizing he still needs to keep improving. Can you imagine if every husband self reflected? Wow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes there are because while a man who is say 35 can have up to 3 quality women to choose from, the same cannot be said for women. And I say this as guy who recently got married. I am 38 and I have more friends that are single than married. For most of them their current girlfriends or the ones they have dated in the past have or have had better career than them.

Men drop out of the dating market if they are not happy in their career. Unfortunately we see a very disturbing trend among men between 30 and 45. They are chronically underemployed, have substance abuse issues, and in poor physical and mental shape
And they have significantly less friends than men their peers in the past. Career satisfaction is really important for a man's ego. If he feels that he has been a failure career wise, he is very unlikely to enter the dating market. So women are waiting for men that don't exist today and that will probably not exist tomorrow either.

I think a lot of women will sadly end up single forever. Not because they are picky or not trying hard enough, but because there are simply not enough qiality men to choose from.

Now I am sure you have taken stats 101, so.if you are the exception I am not talking about you. You are an outlier.

It's funny that as I'm reading this, I'm wishing I was one of those ladies who never got married. Marriage sucks badly for women. Like really badly. I was so much better off emotionally, financially, in every way before I let DH put a ring on it and suck the joy from me. The marriage rate is going to get a lot lower because there's just very little in it for a woman who has her shit together.

If you don't want kids, this is likely true. But if you do want kids and manage to find a guy who will be an involved father (they're out there) then there's something to be said for marriage.

Right, no kids no marriage!
Bad marriage, no kids, GTHO!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am (47) recently divorced and finally checked out the apps for the first time. I am interested in women 37 and older. I was very surprised by the huge number of single women in this age bracket. Of course, it doesn't mean I am who they are looking for and it's probably more likely than I am not. But I went through a lot of well put together profiles and I am just surprised all these women are single. Yes there are probably more women than men in this age group, but it's as if all of them are single.

If I were to lower my age range to 30, it's probably going to be a similar story. But 10 years age gap is the most I'll go for as I am looking beyond just hooking up.

So guys out there who are single and looking, you have choices.

Speaking as a fellow divorced guy, you're missing the reason why these women are single: Higher standards. Women don't see being single the way they did back when you were last on the market.

20 years ago, a woman single in her 30s and 40s would settle for some guy she wasn't particularly attracted to and knew she was going to end up divorcing. The goal was just to get a marriage under the belt because "divorced" at 40 was better than never married at 40.

Nowadays, women are happy to stay single the rest of their lives rather than settle. This is triply true for women who are divorced. A lot of them hated being married and living with a man, and need a really, really, really good offer to consider going back to it.

So, while there are a lot of single women on the market, your chances are probably worse nowadays than they were 20 years ago. The lady who is going to want to get serious and actually stay with you isn't going to be as hot, smart, or emotionally stable as the one who would've wanted you 20 years ago. The woman you think is ideal will break up with you after three to six months today, if she even shows up to date #2.

I'm not going to give my take on whether women's standards today make sense or if the problem is men or whatever. Just laying out the scene.

OP here. Thanks for making excellent points. In fact I am talking to a woman who is 41 and I picked up many of the points that you made. At first I thought it's because I have been out of the market for 22 years, but then I realized the expectations are just not the same anymore. I don't have an opinion whether it's good or bad, but I am finding the journey interesting. This woman I'm taking to she is gorgeous. She has never been married, she has no kids, she owns her house and has a great career. I think she is talking to me just out of interest because she told me straight out that she wants to experience what my first wife experienced (all the milestones etc) and she rightfully said she won't be able to experience that with a divorced man.

Yep, that's what I'm talking about. 20 years ago, she'd have taken a twice divorced dad of 10 kids just to get married ASAP and she'dve stuck with him. Now? If she ever decides to get hitched, big IF there, then she'll pop out a kid in a hurry. After that, she'll start giving the guy a side eye. Countdown to the divorce. A couple of years tops. What she really wanted was the experience and the kid, and then back to her freedom. Seen it over and over. Not saying it's good or bad. Just saying times have changed.

She will quickly realize that she isn't valuable as she once was. Having a bunch of 20 something wanting to have sex with you is just an ego boost. Both men and women want their ego boosted as they age. Totally natural..normal human behavior.