Midlife Sartorial Ennui
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
|
Anyone else have this? I used to love clothes and fashion so much -- it was an easy way for me to boost and maintain my mood. I've always been a budget shopper so there was game aspect of it too, creating the looks I wanted and finding quality items for less.
I dress sooooooo boring now. I miss that feeling I used to get about a cute outfit. But also: my job is full time remote and most of my calls aren't even on screen so I don't dress for the office at all anymore. DH and I have regular date nights but I have a hard time getting excited about dressing for these even, I don't know why. I think part of it is that I stopped wanted attention? Like I think I avoid wearing cute things now because I almost do not want to draw attention to myself by putting that kind of effort in? It feels embarrassing somehow. I can't tell if this is coming from me and just feeling like a more private person, or if I've internalized some BS about being a middle aged woman and how I'm "supposed" to dress. I do feel like a lot of the moms at my kids' school just dress sort of invisibly, and maybe I'm subconsciously buying into that. But then some people dress well and I always admire that so why don't I internalize the way those women dress instead. I don't know, I'm rambling. I am trying to plan some outfits for upcoming events and just feeling so blah about it. Maybe I just don't like how I look anymore. I truly have no idea. Can anyone else relate to this? I'm 45 fwiw. |
Anonymous
| Oh heck yea OP. |
Anonymous
| Excellent title, OP! |
Anonymous
| I, too, suffer from MSE. |
Anonymous
| I don't work and I dress well just for myself, OP. I'm 45 and reject the expectations you are talking about. |
Anonymous
Title was great. But the post was too long and meandering so I didn’t make it through the OP. |
Anonymous
|
It's not as rewarding for you at this period.
This could be a blessing. I think lots of women in their 20s are focused on their appearance in a way that can be unhealthy. This also happens with subsets of women in their 40s, with plastic surgery in the mix, and it can become very stressful. What gives you a buzz these days? Honest perspective: I've found that many women in their 40s get into interior decision, then in their 50s, they get into gardening. I don't know why. I care about neither of those things, but I understand the appeal. |
Anonymous
| I'm 57 and still love clothes and dressing up. I'm more frustrated at how much harder it is to find well-made clothes these days. For a night out last weekend, I pulled out a pair of black velvet Theory trousers that I bought in the 00s . . . the fit is amazing, and the fabric is beautiful. I'd be hard pressed to find something like that off the rack right now, and I wish I had saved more stuff like that over the years. |
Anonymous
| Agree that it’s because clothes are so crap now. But great title. Maybe double check with your doctor on your iron levels or do a depression screen. It’s also working from home is awesome but it’s hard to exit the cocoon. Good clothing can help you generate life force, for lack of a better term. |
Anonymous
|
This thread title - A++++
As for the sentiment, I understand. |
Anonymous
| Yes, 1000x yes. I used to love shopping for clothes and fashion in general. Now I just find myself dressing for comfort and only occasionally stepping it up. I have no explanation, it just is. |
Anonymous
| Clothing is terrible now. Abjectly terrible. |
Anonymous
| You can find good things but retail prices are insane. Anything affordable is fast fashion. I buy the best things I can consignment or thrifting. I too am 45 and feel frumpy but don’t feel like I can get away with wearing crap anymore. My waist is thicker and I look tired. My outfit needs to be a little better. |
Anonymous
|
I'm the opposite rn. I'm pretty low key, but I have a desire to dress better rn. I just bought a bunch of dresses for Black Friday since we got out a lot -- and I normally wear jeans and a blazer. Who knows if I'll return everything -- LOL.
I WFH and 52. |
Anonymous
|
If you want some ideas or some inspiration, I recommend looking at Hey Mrs. Solomom’s instagram account (she’s in her 50s). She also has a great Substack.
|