Perfect guy, sex life sucks.

[Anonymous]

I met the man of my dreams a few weeks ago and it’s been heaven. I’m happier than I’ve been in years, and even though it’s new, I could see myself marrying him (something I never thought I’d do).

However - we just can’t seem to get aligned sexually. We do have sex, and it’s fine, but there’s no real passion. It often feels mechanical and like we’re going through the motions. Like we’re just trying to get off as fast as possible. We do kiss and do foreplay, but I just don’t feel any real passion behind it from him, which is killing my passion for him.

A couple things that may also be going on is that he’s very goofy overall, so when it comes to sex, I really never know if he’s going to do something like start talking in a silly voice (which is a huge turn off for me). The other is that before him, I dated a man I wasn’t compatible with but we had the most intense sex life, it was extremely primal and passionate.

I don’t want to lose a great guy, but I’m at a loss on what to do. It’s not just requesting specific acts; I can ask for XYZ and he’ll do it, but the *feeling* just isn’t there.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like he's not the one for you

[Anonymous]

End it. Seriously.

[Anonymous]

How old are you both?

Dh and I met young and sex at first wasn’t great, but it became great.

[Anonymous]

You’re not sexually compatible.
End the relationship

[Anonymous]

Don’t place so much emphasis on sex.

[Anonymous]

You sound like you're too into sex and are kinda slutty

[Anonymous]

How many times have you done it?
Maybe it's still new relationship nerves and you need to learn each other's bodies. Maybe your putting too much pressure on yourselves and maybe you just need to relax spend time together without thinking the evening must end in sex, dinner, movie, cook together, have some wine, massage , just kids and touch each other and see where it goes. Do you sense he's not enjoying it?

But the way you speak of him it sounds like you want to like him because on paper he's " perfect" you think you should

But you aren't really attracted to him and you can't hide that in bed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t place so much emphasis on sex.

You say this but let's just say things don't improve and op marries him 3 then she comes her unsatisfied you'll be first to say didn't you have sex before marriage!!!

[Anonymous]

If you were a man I would have said stick with her because she is a great a woman.

But as a woman I'll say dump him. Sexual compatibility is extremely important for women. Of you are not her guy sexually she will always feel like she is missing something..and you will forever be on borrow time.

[Anonymous]

Oh no. I’m really sorry.

[Anonymous]

You will never be happy. You have a basically-perfect relationship, including a decent sex life, but it's not 100% perfect all around so you're going to nitpick it to death.

You're the reason for your own unhappiness, and should get that looked at.

[Anonymous]

This will not improve. Throw him back.

[Anonymous]

To be honest most women of they were honest would rate sex in their relationship with a. B- grade.

Women are more passionate lover than men. Have you noticed how men quickly lose interest in sex as soon as they ejaculate? And that's the moment when a lot of women want to cuddle etc

[Anonymous]

OP, have you told him explicitly, at a neutral time, that joking in bed is a turn-off for you? He can’t read your mind. Are you attracted to him visually?