She left me because I don't spend enough time with her

[Anonymous]

I'm divorced and been dating another divorced woman for the past year. Because my income from my regular job is not enough since I have to pay child support I drive for Uber in the early mornings and late at night before and after my regular job. So as a result we don't have a lot of quality time together. At first it was fine but overtime it became an issue

She has kids as a well and a recipient of child support and I thought she was a great match because she would understand my situation.

If you are a woman and have been in a similar situation, how has dating been for you? This is discouraging to be honest.

[Anonymous]

I didn’t date men who were stretched so thin.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, time matters to some women, like me. More than money and looks.

[Anonymous]

Most women who pay for child support do well financially. Women are not known for marrying men who earn significantly less than them.

Second call it double standard if you want, but a woman in a similar situation will expect the man to drop his extra job even if it means financial hardship just so he could with her instead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t date men who were stretched so thin.

Should men avoid women who are stretched so thin like OP? Just wondering. Should men avoid these women?

Or does it only apply to men?

[Anonymous]

Keep looking and don’t get discouraged, OP. You didn’t meet the expectations of this one particular woman. It doesn’t mean there’s no one else out there for you.

[Anonymous]

You should probably wait until you’re in a better place to start dating. I don’t mean that in a harmful way. It sounds like you were really struggling to make ends meet, and that doesn’t leave a lot left for you to have personal time. When I’m dating someone they need to have their own life outside of work and me.

How long have you been divorced?

[Anonymous]

How often did you see her?

I dated a man in a similar situation earlier this year and it was very frustrating. He never made concrete plans with me and often cancelled last minute because he was tired. I didn’t mind that he was busy, I minded that he could never make solid plans with me, so it was basically a texting relationship with me nagging him “when do I get to see you next?”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You should probably wait until you’re in a better place to start dating. I don’t mean that in a harmful way. It sounds like you were really struggling to make ends meet, and that doesn’t leave a lot left for you to have personal time. When I’m dating someone they need to have their own life outside of work and me.

How long have you been divorced?

This - very unlikely that you find someone that is sympathetic to your situation. It’s a harsh reality and it sucks but ignoring means greater unhappiness

[Anonymous]

I’m a woman in a similar situation - financially struggling (but because ex doesn’t pay adequate support and sometimes doesn’t pay at all).

The bottom line is that I don’t date, and I won’t date until I am in a better position financially. First, any money I have to spend on dating needs to go to my kids. Second, any time and effort I would have for dating needs to be spent on my kids and on me getting in a better career position. I have a side gig (not driving Uber), and a side gig is not a long term solution.

You don’t mention what kind and how much custody you have. If you don’t have your kids 50/50 and don’t spend substantial quality time with your kids, that is a red flag for anyone you date.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t date men who were stretched so thin.

Should men avoid women who are stretched so thin like OP? Just wondering. Should men avoid these women?

Or does it only apply to men?

People should do whatever they want. I wanted a wealthy man who spends time with me and gives me attention. So I found that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should probably wait until you’re in a better place to start dating. I don’t mean that in a harmful way. It sounds like you were really struggling to make ends meet, and that doesn’t leave a lot left for you to have personal time. When I’m dating someone they need to have their own life outside of work and me.

How long have you been divorced?

This - very unlikely that you find someone that is sympathetic to your situation. It’s a harsh reality and it sucks but ignoring means greater unhappiness

For men yes. For women no. A woman in a similar situation will find plenty of men who will bend backwards for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t date men who were stretched so thin.

Should men avoid women who are stretched so thin like OP? Just wondering. Should men avoid these women?

Or does it only apply to men?

People should do whatever they want. I wanted a wealthy man who spends time with me and gives me attention. So I found that.

I hope you can keep that wealthy man.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you should find a job that pays better? I can't imagine Uber driving paying very well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t date men who were stretched so thin.

Should men avoid women who are stretched so thin like OP? Just wondering. Should men avoid these women?

Or does it only apply to men?

Well yes. If someone doesn't have time to date, then don't date them. Obviously.

She may have other reasons but this was what she thought was polite or least likely to anger you.aybe take some time to remedy your financial situation and then you'll be more able to date successfully.