What is going on with so many destructive children??

[Anonymous]

I’ve been on dcum for 15+ years now. And I’ve been on this board for many of those years for adhd/anxiety and not for PDA or ODD or Autism. So forgive me if I’m ignorant.

But I feel like in the past couple of years there has been an exponential increase in parents reporting that their kids are destructive and/or violent at home and sometimes at school. I went through years of school and never saw this. My kids are late teens and went to two different elementary schools (due to a move) and middle/high schools and have never been in a class whose room had to be cleared.

Every day there’s a new post about a child being destructive. What is happening nowadays? Something has changed. Are these kids unable to cope because of WiFi signals constantly messing them up? Some sort of additive in our food supply? Autism and ODD certain existed before, and I know it was under diagnosed, I get that, but what is going on with the physical behaviors that are putting classes and homes at risk of being destroyed?

[Anonymous]

My kid is 20 and I’ve been posting here about aggression for at least 15 years. There is a lot of shame that comes with a kid who has aggressive behaviors, especially when they are primarily at home. I imagine there are people who didn’t post, even in an anonymous forum, because of the backlash from other parents. Hopefully you are seeing more posts because when people open up, it allows others to do the same. I don’t wish this type of situation on anyone, but every time I see someone post here, I am so glad they reached out for help. It makes it easier for all of us.

[Anonymous]

Also, look at how adults are behaving these days. Not surprising that kids are following suit.

[Anonymous]

As a sibling of a kid with autism and aggression, and as a special education teacher of many years one thing that has happened is that people are more open about sharing and kids who struggle are more like to stay in community settings.

I can remember my older sibling getting expelled from summer camp for behavior, my parents told me not to tell the neighbors and gave my sibling beer so they would be calmer and willing to stay at home so no one would see them until they were due home from camp. Shame is a powerful force.

[Anonymous]

Also electronic addiction

[Anonymous]

Similar number of special needs kids but add in the perfect storm of covid, electronic addiction and gentle parenting with few boundaries and there you have it.

[Anonymous]

Mainstreaming + budget cuts that result in more kids in the classroom and less staff to handle them. But mainly it's the-least-restrictive-environment. And parents who will fight tooth and nail to keep their kids mainstreamed.

[Anonymous]

I agree with PPs that we hear about this more because families are more open about their children’s struggles. I also think we’re seeing more big behaviors in school because we have fewer/smaller special education programs and classrooms. Inclusion is wonderful but it’s not the right fit for every kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mainstreaming + budget cuts that result in more kids in the classroom and less staff to handle them. But mainly it's the-least-restrictive-environment. And parents who will fight tooth and nail to keep their kids mainstreamed.

And on the flip side, school districts that don't want to pay for appropriate settings.

[Anonymous]

I think people are more open about it. It used to be hidden and there was no social media to talk to people about from all over. So while it may seem like more, you’re getting exposure from millions of people, not just the ones in your school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mainstreaming + budget cuts that result in more kids in the classroom and less staff to handle them. But mainly it's the-least-restrictive-environment. And parents who will fight tooth and nail to keep their kids mainstreamed.

And on the flip side, school districts that don't want to pay for appropriate settings.

Yes.

[Anonymous]

My kids are 20 and 15 and both had destructive and aggressive kids in their different elementary schools in MCPS.

One, I am persuaded, had some sort of sociopathy - he deliberately hurt others in a calculating way and seemed to get a kick out of it. The other had an ADHD/ASD profile and an explosive temper when he was overwhelmed. Both stayed for some years in MCPS and then left when their issues got too severe in late elementary.

So either you were lucky or not paying attention.

[Anonymous]

19:40 again. Not every autistic kid displays aggression, BTW. My 20 year old son also has an ADHD/ASD profile, and has never had a tantrum. He's a terminal daydreamer.

[Anonymous]

Food additives, chemicals, etc
Sugar, so much sugar
Electronics
Electronics
Electronics
Parents that use a diagnosis as an excuse for poor behavior
Inadequate early intervention, waiting until the child is in school to do anything about this.

[Anonymous]

Remember, there was a global event 5 years ago when overwhelmed parents were told “tough luck” and many of them had to give their kids unlimited and unfiltered screen time in order to be able to put food on the table?