Husband doesn’t want me to get surgery

[Anonymous]

I dislike my body after having two kids. I’m fit and workout but my once perky breasts are sagging a little, cellulite, and a lot of stretch marks. I don’t feel confident body and decided to change it. I’m going to go through laser therapy and sculpting to help lighten the stretch marks and get rid of the cellulite. I’ve been looking into a breast lift ( still my natural breasts). My husband is in support of the first two but has voiced his disproval of a breast lift. I know it’s my body but I do respect my husband’s opinion. Would you get the surgery anyway despite his objections?

[Anonymous]

The reason for his objection matters OP. What did he say was the reason?

[Anonymous]

He doesn’t want your children to have no mother because of some silly vain selfish procedure. There are major risks associated. Mom with boobs “sagging a little” > dead mom or seriously injured mom etc etc.

I wouldn’t go through with a major surgery with these rejections. Even if everything goes well, you will not be able to fully care for your children for a while. You will NEED his help. If he’s not on board it could be really messy.

[Anonymous]

I would probably table it for a while. He might have an issue with the cost, in which case stretching all these procedures out would help. Or he might think you're falling into that "just one more thing" cycle that some people who get plastic surgery end up in - and he's worried you're doing too much altogether.

If you still want it in a year, and in the mean time you haven't brought up like 5 different "cool sculpting" / thermage / Renuvion / whatever the newest new thing is as additions to the to do list, he likely won't object. Or if he does, but it's been a year and you still want it, it will be easier to just say "listen this is my body and it's something I've wanted for a while now, all the non-surgical steps have been taken and I'm still not happy. I'm getting it done."

[Anonymous]

What exactly are his concerns? The cost? The risk? The concerns that you're going to get addicted to this type of thing or that you're always going to be wanting to do one more thing? I like pps suggestion of tabling it for a year.

[Anonymous]

My husband wouldn't want me to have elective, unnecessary surgery either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The reason for his objection matters OP. What did he say was the reason?

Surgery risk is his main and only concern.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband wouldn't want me to have elective, unnecessary surgery either.

Same. Nor would I him. He would definitely be in the area of not wanting it and not agreeing with it, but knowing it was my body and not putting up a fight if that's what I wanted to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What exactly are his concerns? The cost? The risk? The concerns that you're going to get addicted to this type of thing or that you're always going to be wanting to do one more thing? I like pps suggestion of tabling it for a year.

The cost and childcare aspect isn’t a concern. His concern is that it’s a very risky surgery because I will have to be put to sleep. He does not like the idea of it and prefers I don’t do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason for his objection matters OP. What did he say was the reason?

Surgery risk is his main and only concern.

Definitely a valid concern. From his POV, you're putting yourself at risk for vanity and nothing else. Risk for post op complication is small, but it's still there. Personally it wouldn't be worth it for me for a boob lift. I also think this type of thinking is a slippery slope. You'll find something else you're not happy about.

[Anonymous]

Hmmm..I had my breasts done prior to meeting husband.
Had em' redone following two kids.

He had zero issues. I'm still alive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason for his objection matters OP. What did he say was the reason?

Surgery risk is his main and only concern.

Definitely a valid concern. From his POV, you're putting yourself at risk for vanity and nothing else. Risk for post op complication is small, but it's still there. Personally it wouldn't be worth it for me for a boob lift. I also think this type of thinking is a slippery slope. You'll find something else you're not happy about.

+1.

[Anonymous]

Breast lift is no big deal. It's your body.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What exactly are his concerns? The cost? The risk? The concerns that you're going to get addicted to this type of thing or that you're always going to be wanting to do one more thing? I like pps suggestion of tabling it for a year.

The cost and childcare aspect isn’t a concern. His concern is that it’s a very risky surgery because I will have to be put to sleep. He does not like the idea of it and prefers I don’t do it.

It's not very risky surgery and people are put to sleep for procedures all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What exactly are his concerns? The cost? The risk? The concerns that you're going to get addicted to this type of thing or that you're always going to be wanting to do one more thing? I like pps suggestion of tabling it for a year.

The cost and childcare aspect isn’t a concern. His concern is that it’s a very risky surgery because I will have to be put to sleep. He does not like the idea of it and prefers I don’t do it.

It's not very risky surgery and people are put to sleep for procedures all the time.

It's not but I get his point. Any surgery carries a risk and in his eyes, he doesn't really get why you would do a completely elective surgery that carries any risk. Some people are nervous and risk adverse.