My Mom just passed suddenly this AM

[Anonymous]

Husband: "Let me know if I can do anything; I'm headed out on a bike ride"
Close male friend calls: "Want to offer my condolences; you wouldn't believe (latest political stuff)"

God, men suck sometimes!

As for Mom, was not expecting it but she was on the decline at her assisted living. Blessing is she went fast (stroke), her way, and was very happy where she was living. She loved it and they loved her. She and my sister live cross-country and sister said she can handle all the arrangements with my mother's friend and I need not come out. Her urn and my Dad's urn (he passed two years ago) will be sent to me as she said she wanted to be (and I quote) "on the mantle of doom with your pets and your MIL". LOL.

We will have a celebration of live in NY where most family is in the next few months.

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry for your loss. She sounds like a very cool lady!

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry for your loss. It does feel very ....I don't know what the word is. Oh well, there you go, pish posh let's all just move on.

But I hope over the next few days you can take some time for yourself and grieve the way you need to.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry for your loss. What the hell is wrong with your husband? Is he normally like this when stuff like this happens? When everything is settled I'd have a conversation with him about this. My attraction to DH would have been very damaged if he acted like this after my dad's death.

[Anonymous]

How are you feeling?

I'm worried that you're putting on a brave face but are not OK with this cavalier attitude of your loved ones and friends.

My condolences, OP.

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry, OP. My mom passed in a similar fashion a few months ago, and I was still shocked even though she was declining and I technically "expected" it. I also took comfort in the idea that she didn't linger in a nursing home, confined to a bed for weeks on end.

We did a delayed celebration of life too, and I really appreciated the gap to help me process everything (and figure out what to say!)

I know it's a difficult time. So hard to lose your mother. Hugs to you

[Anonymous]

So you’re not doing anything, but the men suck because they’re not doing anything? Ok….

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Husband: "Let me know if I can do anything; I'm headed out on a bike ride"
Close male friend calls: "Want to offer my condolences; you wouldn't believe (latest political stuff)"

God, men suck sometimes!

As for Mom, was not expecting it but she was on the decline at her assisted living. Blessing is she went fast (stroke), her way, and was very happy where she was living. She loved it and they loved her. She and my sister live cross-country and sister said she can handle all the arrangements with my mother's friend and I need not come out. Her urn and my Dad's urn (he passed two years ago) will be sent to me as she said she wanted to be (and I quote) "on the mantle of doom with your pets and your MIL". LOL.

We will have a celebration of live in NY where most family is in the next few months.

I would want to go and spend time in town with your sister, and miss your sister is nuts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Husband: "Let me know if I can do anything; I'm headed out on a bike ride"
Close male friend calls: "Want to offer my condolences; you wouldn't believe (latest political stuff)"

God, men suck sometimes!

As for Mom, was not expecting it but she was on the decline at her assisted living. Blessing is she went fast (stroke), her way, and was very happy where she was living. She loved it and they loved her. She and my sister live cross-country and sister said she can handle all the arrangements with my mother's friend and I need not come out. Her urn and my Dad's urn (he passed two years ago) will be sent to me as she said she wanted to be (and I quote) "on the mantle of doom with your pets and your MIL". LOL.

We will have a celebration of live in NY where most family is in the next few months.

I would want to go and spend time in town with your sister, and miss your sister is nuts.

^ "unless" your sister...

[Anonymous]

Oh she sounds fantastic! I am sorry for your loss.

And yes men..... if thyey can't fix it they just peace out. Wouldn't that be nice if we all could.

This whole part is the anticlimatic part. Let it sink in and then decide what is best for you. Your mom would want that!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How are you feeling?

I'm worried that you're putting on a brave face but are not OK with this cavalier attitude of your loved ones and friends.

My condolences, OP.

I'm not ok - I think it's rude. I do have my sister, cousins and other family so I have plenty of support, so brave face not needed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How are you feeling?

I'm worried that you're putting on a brave face but are not OK with this cavalier attitude of your loved ones and friends.

My condolences, OP.

I'm not ok - I think it's rude. I do have my sister, cousins and other family so I have plenty of support, so brave face not needed.

PP you replied to. Then I would upbraid the menfolk, honestly. Especially that moron of a husband of yours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh she sounds fantastic! I am sorry for your loss.

And yes men..... if thyey can't fix it they just peace out. Wouldn't that be nice if we all could.

This whole part is the anticlimatic part. Let it sink in and then decide what is best for you. Your mom would want that!

Thank you. I plan to put a new roof on my screen porch at my beach house with a bit of the inheritance she thoughtfully left. She loved having her coffee on that porch in the rocker. I'll hang a plaque that says "Jean's Place". And of course, there is definitely room on the "mantle of doom"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Husband: "Let me know if I can do anything; I'm headed out on a bike ride"
Close male friend calls: "Want to offer my condolences; you wouldn't believe (latest political stuff)"

God, men suck sometimes!

As for Mom, was not expecting it but she was on the decline at her assisted living. Blessing is she went fast (stroke), her way, and was very happy where she was living. She loved it and they loved her. She and my sister live cross-country and sister said she can handle all the arrangements with my mother's friend and I need not come out. Her urn and my Dad's urn (he passed two years ago) will be sent to me as she said she wanted to be (and I quote) "on the mantle of doom with your pets and your MIL". LOL.

We will have a celebration of live in NY where most family is in the next few months.

I would want to go and spend time in town with your sister, and miss your sister is nuts.

She wants me to handle other aspects from here. She has support there. I was going to get on a plane and she said 'not necessary, If and when I move back east, come get me and we'll drive back.' I plan on going this fall.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How are you feeling?

I'm worried that you're putting on a brave face but are not OK with this cavalier attitude of your loved ones and friends.

My condolences, OP.

I'm not ok - I think it's rude. I do have my sister, cousins and other family so I have plenty of support, so brave face not needed.

PP you replied to. Then I would upbraid the menfolk, honestly. Especially that moron of a husband of yours.

He probably thinks since he offered to help in any way possible, I'm good. The fact he walked away with me talking mid-sentence to get ready for his ride, not good.