Getting out of a relationship that I’m not completely sure how I got into

[Anonymous]

I’d like to start out by saying I am not a troll regardless of how ridiculous this sounds. I bought a fixer upper and hired a general contractor to work on it. To say he is not my typical type is to put it mildly. The house has taken 5 months to work on and in that time somehow we are in some kind of undefined relationship that goes beyond the scope of what he initially came here for. I guess we saw too much of each other everyday and just became too comfortable and familiar with one another. We are both single and our relationship doesn’t extend beyond the house. We don’t go out on dates but we’ll spend days at a time together. The work is almost over and he keeps trying to find things to do to keep having a reason to come over. He also didn’t want to get paid for work he’s done but I insisted I pay him what’s fair but checks remain uncashed. There isn’t a future for us and I need to end this relationship gracefully. How do I go about doing this?

[Anonymous]

Sell your story to Hallmark Channel.

[Anonymous]

Murphy Brown show! She didn’t get rid of him. He lived with her forever.

[Anonymous]

Just tell him it's not working out and he needs to packnup and move. The end.

[Anonymous]

Have you slept with this guy? When he is spending “days at a time” at your house does that include overnights?

[Anonymous]

Are the biggest projects completed? Cut him loose.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you slept with this guy? When he is spending “days at a time” at your house does that include overnights?

Yes. The relationship moved from strictly client/contractor to something undefined but definitely not profession around the 3rd month in. I work from home. I don’t think this would have happened had we not spend so much time together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are the biggest projects completed? Cut him loose.

Yes but I feel like that’s easier said than done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sell your story to Hallmark Channel.

NP, this is nice. I was picturing horror film.

[Anonymous]

It seems like the same thing that is keeping you from ending it is the same reason youre in this predicament in this in the first place - you’re non-confrontational and can’t say “no”, even though you don’t want to do something.

What do you’ll think he’ll say or do if you tried to break it off? Are you afraid of hurting his feelings?

[Anonymous]

I'm guessing you don't want a LTR with him? Catch Covid. Tell him you need to quarantine to get him out of your house. During that week, change your locks. After "Covid" ask him to meet you out for coffee. And then tell him honestly that the situationship you both ended up in was nice but also strange and you need to end it. You both were playing house more than forging a relationship. Insist that he cash your checks and that your square up what you owe him for his work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It seems like the same thing that is keeping you from ending it is the same reason youre in this predicament in this in the first place - you’re non-confrontational and can’t say “no”, even though you don’t want to do something.

What do you’ll think he’ll say or do if you tried to break it off? Are you afraid of hurting his feelings?

I’m afraid of hurting his feelings even though I can rationalize that there isn’t a future and this relationship should not have crossed the professional line. I don’t think he wants this to end which is why he tries to find more work to do. You’re right that I am usually non confrontational.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are the biggest projects completed? Cut him loose.

Yes but I feel like that’s easier said than done.

Ya think? I mean, sister, you put yourself into a super weird situation because I'm guessing you don't know yourself very well and lack a backbone. So start remedying that. Do you fear what he might do if you cut it off?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems like the same thing that is keeping you from ending it is the same reason youre in this predicament in this in the first place - you’re non-confrontational and can’t say “no”, even though you don’t want to do something.

What do you’ll think he’ll say or do if you tried to break it off? Are you afraid of hurting his feelings?

I’m afraid of hurting his feelings even though I can rationalize that there isn’t a future and this relationship should not have crossed the professional line. I don’t think he wants this to end which is why he tries to find more work to do. You’re right that I am usually non confrontational.

Do you feel you were coerced?

[Anonymous]

Are you married or divorced