If someone helped your child make a mother's day present for someone else.

[Anonymous]

would you be upset?

If someone helped your toddler make you a gift with hand prints, and made extras for other female family members, such as aunts, or grandma, would that bother you? Would it make you feel less special to know that other people got essentially the same gift?

[Anonymous]

Not at all.

[Anonymous]

No

[Anonymous]

No I wouldn’t be upset. Wtf.

[Anonymous]

Of course not.

[Anonymous]

Would it bother me that other people same gift from the person who helped my toddler put their handprints on paper, likely a daycare worker? No.

[Anonymous]

No, I would be happy that my kid had something to give my mom and mil and I didn't have to facilitate a card or gift. If this happened in a day care or school, I would especially understand if the teachers helped kids make multiple crafts since some kids might have two moms, a step mom, a foster mom, etc. It's good when kids have lots of adults who love them. You're special because you are your kid's mom; you don't need to be the only one who gets a certain present for that to be true.

[Anonymous]

No. Not if the person helping meant well.

If it's cute, why not share?

By the time my kids were out of daycare, I'd seen just about every variant of handprint art and footprint art that's widely circulated.

The most liked daycare craft (a paper angel made of a rolled paper cone with paper wings and a photographic school picture sized head) was such a hit my mom unrolled it, color copied it, made extras, and put it back together. Mine is still on my living room shelf.

[Anonymous]

This feels off the charts overly sensitive, OP. Do you feel your child can only love you, not aunts or grandmothers? Because that to me is at the heart of your anger at the care person. You don't want your child to show love for any other female relative.

[Anonymous]

OMG, your husband helped your kid make you a sweet Mother’s Day present. So what if he made a second handprint for his mom?

Come on, this is creating conflict where there is none. He’s showing your child by example to celebrate her mom on Mother’s Day. That’s what he should be doing. You should say thank you and enjoy the gifts.

You are 100% wrong here.

Did his mom post her handprint on Facebook before you and now you don’t feel special anymore? If so, talk it out with your therapist but don’t admit this to anyone in real life. Yikes.

[Anonymous]

Possibly. DH has a history of being pretty thoughtless when it comes to me, but he still falls all over himself to do things for his mom (like all the time, not just for MD). It would have bothered me early on because I would have been 99% sure that he bothered with a gift at all because he wanted to give his mom one, and the one for me was an after thought or because my child mentioned it.

At this point I just have no expectations for him, though, and my kids are much older, so it wouldn't bother me at all. But I can imagine something like this bothering me in the past solely because I would have known (assumed) that I was not the originally intended recipient. If I thought he got the idea for me and then just wanted to include other moms, I would have thought that was sweet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This feels off the charts overly sensitive, OP. Do you feel your child can only love you, not aunts or grandmothers? Because that to me is at the heart of your anger at the care person. You don't want your child to show love for any other female relative.

OP here,

I'm the aunt who got the extra, not the mom who is upset. Trying to figure out if other people would agree with my sister.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This feels off the charts overly sensitive, OP. Do you feel your child can only love you, not aunts or grandmothers? Because that to me is at the heart of your anger at the care person. You don't want your child to show love for any other female relative.

OP here,

I'm the aunt who got the extra, not the mom who is upset. Trying to figure out if other people would agree with my sister.

I'm this PP. Was it your sister's DH that did it? Or was it a caretaker/teacher/aide who did it. That could make a difference.

Whatever the case, your sister shouldn't be mad at you. And if it's a care person and not her DH, then she is insecure if she is upset. My guess is that given she's your sister you know the answer. Rightfully upset or insecure.

[Anonymous]

When I was a new mom, it might have bothered me. Now as a raggedly old mom, it wouldn’t bother me. 😄

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This feels off the charts overly sensitive, OP. Do you feel your child can only love you, not aunts or grandmothers? Because that to me is at the heart of your anger at the care person. You don't want your child to show love for any other female relative.

OP here,

I'm the aunt who got the extra, not the mom who is upset. Trying to figure out if other people would agree with my sister.

I'm this PP. Was it your sister's DH that did it? Or was it a caretaker/teacher/aide who did it. That could make a difference.

Whatever the case, your sister shouldn't be mad at you. And if it's a care person and not her DH, then she is insecure if she is upset. My guess is that given she's your sister you know the answer. Rightfully upset or insecure.

Neither, it was our brother who did it. Sister is separated and has a toddler. Brother and his wife also have a toddler, so he took both kids and made art projects for the kids' moms and grandmas, and then made an extra one for me, and one for an elderly great-aunt in memory care. He said figuring out how to get it right was hard, but once he did replicating it was easy so he just kept going. My SIL (Brother's wife) was not hurt, just my sister.

I took her older kid and helped her make a gift, but we just did her mom and grandma.