We don’t agree on moving

[Anonymous]

My family consists of myself, my husband, and our infant child. We live in a 2bd 2ba 1500sqft. high rise with amazing amenities - huge gym, yoga room, indoor pool, rooftop with outdoor pool, child playroom, and business area to work from home. It’s close to our jobs and stores. It’s secured and makes him feel comfortable knowing we are safe when he’s home on business trips. We pay a hefty price of $6500 ( rent + utilities). We will be trying for our second ( and final) child soon and will need space. I suggested we look for houses or a townhome but husband doesn’t want to leave our community. He wants to stay here and get a bigger place but a 3bd rent starts at $8k. We will be spending $10k month with utilities. We can get a house with a year or even a nice townhome for that price.

My husband thinks we should stay here until kid(s) are old ready to go to school. His logic is we will be breaking even because of taxes and upkeep for a home.

[Anonymous]

You will spend $2000 on utilities for a 3 bedroom apartment?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You will spend $2000 on utilities for a 3 bedroom apartment?

OP here. The units for 3bd start at 8k. It can go up to $10k depending on the layout and the floor.

[Anonymous]

Well it sounds to me you'll need to do a bit of research on places and try to convince him with a financial plan/financial breakdown. Otherwise you'll just go around in circles arguing and it doesn't sound like he's going to take the initiative there.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't be comfortable with the rental but also do not love interest rates. I would personally truly break out costs for both and see which one you can tolerate. Also, can you get away with the new baby in your room for a bit to put off moving?

[Anonymous]

You don’t need to move at all for a second baby. You already have 1500 sq feet.

[Anonymous]

NYTimes.com has a rent vs buy calculator that you can run.

I also would consider staying put in 1500 sq ft and see how things go.

[Anonymous]

He will feel differently when the baby is walking and getting into things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't be comfortable with the rental but also do not love interest rates. I would personally truly break out costs for both and see which one you can tolerate. Also, can you get away with the new baby in your room for a bit to put off moving?

OP here. We do plan to have the new baby in our room for 4-6 months. I suppose they can share a room but it will be tight.

We absolutely love the building. My husband works from home and works in the work lounge, my work is a 10 minute walk, our nanny enjoys him the infant playroom ( never anyone else in there), we love the gym, it’s close to shopping, running trails, and restaurants. I feel very safe when he’s away on business. It fits our life very well.

I just wish we had more space because baby stuff makes things very cluttered.

We would spend more on a house with taxes but it’s an investment.

We have the means to afford our lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You don’t need to move at all for a second baby. You already have 1500 sq feet.

+1. Stay where you are. You don’t need 3 bedrooms for 2 small kids. They can share a room.

Interest rates are awful right now so it’s not a good time to buy a home. Paying 10k for a 3bd rental also seems like a bad idea, financially.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don’t need to move at all for a second baby. You already have 1500 sq feet.

+1. Stay where you are. You don’t need 3 bedrooms for 2 small kids. They can share a room.

Interest rates are awful right now so it’s not a good time to buy a home. Paying 10k for a 3bd rental also seems like a bad idea, financially.

OP here. We will be spending $2-3mil on a home and it will equal out. I still think we are throwing our money away.

My husband likes the convenience of everything. We have a Target across the street, Whole Foods two blocks away, multiple restaurants with a mile radius, our nanny lives within walking distance. There’s an excellent daycare with a mile of us if we ever go that route.

Buying a house would mean a large commute, added expenses with outsourcing, and having to find a new nanny.

I still hate that we are throwing away so much money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't be comfortable with the rental but also do not love interest rates. I would personally truly break out costs for both and see which one you can tolerate. Also, can you get away with the new baby in your room for a bit to put off moving?

OP here. We do plan to have the new baby in our room for 4-6 months. I suppose they can share a room but it will be tight.

We absolutely love the building. My husband works from home and works in the work lounge, my work is a 10 minute walk, our nanny enjoys him the infant playroom ( never anyone else in there), we love the gym, it’s close to shopping, running trails, and restaurants. I feel very safe when he’s away on business. It fits our life very well.

I just wish we had more space because baby stuff makes things very cluttered.

We would spend more on a house with taxes but it’s an investment.

We have the means to afford our lifestyle.

This sounds terrible for the nanny. Having to move to another location in the building because of cramped living conditions? Husband having to work in a glorified wework?

Sorry but you’re used to suboptimal living conditions and paying $8k a month.

If you want an urban lifestyle like this you simply don’t have kids. Or you grow up and accept the reality and you move to the burbs like everyone else. The other option is you’re wealthy enough to live a nice lifestyle and doesn’t sound like you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don’t need to move at all for a second baby. You already have 1500 sq feet.

+1. Stay where you are. You don’t need 3 bedrooms for 2 small kids. They can share a room.

Interest rates are awful right now so it’s not a good time to buy a home. Paying 10k for a 3bd rental also seems like a bad idea, financially.

OP here. We will be spending $2-3mil on a home and it will equal out. I still think we are throwing our money away.

My husband likes the convenience of everything. We have a Target across the street, Whole Foods two blocks away, multiple restaurants with a mile radius, our nanny lives within walking distance. There’s an excellent daycare with a mile of us if we ever go that route.

Buying a house would mean a large commute, added expenses with outsourcing, and having to find a new nanny.

I still hate that we are throwing away so much money.

There’s nothing in between these two options? It’s a 3 million dollar house or 8k in rent? Are you in Manhattan?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't be comfortable with the rental but also do not love interest rates. I would personally truly break out costs for both and see which one you can tolerate. Also, can you get away with the new baby in your room for a bit to put off moving?

OP here. We do plan to have the new baby in our room for 4-6 months. I suppose they can share a room but it will be tight.

We absolutely love the building. My husband works from home and works in the work lounge, my work is a 10 minute walk, our nanny enjoys him the infant playroom ( never anyone else in there), we love the gym, it’s close to shopping, running trails, and restaurants. I feel very safe when he’s away on business. It fits our life very well.

I just wish we had more space because baby stuff makes things very cluttered.

We would spend more on a house with taxes but it’s an investment.

We have the means to afford our lifestyle.

This sounds terrible for the nanny. Having to move to another location in the building because of cramped living conditions? Husband having to work in a glorified wework?

Sorry but you’re used to suboptimal living conditions and paying $8k a month.

If you want an urban lifestyle like this you simply don’t have kids. Or you grow up and accept the reality and you move to the burbs like everyone else. The other option is you’re wealthy enough to live a nice lifestyle and doesn’t sound like you are.

OP here. Our baby has free rein of the living room and his nursery. She does take him down to the playroom 1-2 times a day to break up the day. She also takes him on walks. She doesn’t have to leave our unit if she doesn’t want to but she likes to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't be comfortable with the rental but also do not love interest rates. I would personally truly break out costs for both and see which one you can tolerate. Also, can you get away with the new baby in your room for a bit to put off moving?

OP here. We do plan to have the new baby in our room for 4-6 months. I suppose they can share a room but it will be tight.

We absolutely love the building. My husband works from home and works in the work lounge, my work is a 10 minute walk, our nanny enjoys him the infant playroom ( never anyone else in there), we love the gym, it’s close to shopping, running trails, and restaurants. I feel very safe when he’s away on business. It fits our life very well.

I just wish we had more space because baby stuff makes things very cluttered.

We would spend more on a house with taxes but it’s an investment.

We have the means to afford our lifestyle.

This sounds terrible for the nanny. Having to move to another location in the building because of cramped living conditions? Husband having to work in a glorified wework?

Sorry but you’re used to suboptimal living conditions and paying $8k a month.

If you want an urban lifestyle like this you simply don’t have kids. Or you grow up and accept the reality and you move to the burbs like everyone else. The other option is you’re wealthy enough to live a nice lifestyle and doesn’t sound like you are.

OP here. My husband has an entire floor almost all to himself with all the work spaces. The work room has a conference and a separate huge floor with a bar, ice machine, microwave, fridge, and enough space to fit about 50 people comfortably.

He can work in the room with his desk but he enjoys being able to work in a separate space.

The infant playroom is the sizes of like 4 large cars. It’s massive. The gym itself is also the size of a large condo. There is no subpar standard living here.