I don't understand parents who are flashy with their wealth but send their kids to public school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I clearly did touch a nerve. Predictably I suppose.

I want to clarify that what I find odd is not that there are SOME wealthy families who send their kids to public school, but that there’s a particular obsession at some public schools with being flashy. YSL handbags are like the least expensive designer handbags you can buy - but people buy them in part because they scream “I’m expensive” even to those who know nothing about handbags. And I guess I don’t understand that mentality - wanting to look expensive to strangers - when MOST of those women are not super wealthy. And most wealthy women I know don’t carry an entry-level YSL logo handbag.

Anyway, i don’t really understand what it is I’m getting at, but this thread is helping me realize it’s less about school choice and more about displays of wealth and their meaning that I find confusing, and interesting, particularly in certain subcultures (where half the moms carry the same handbag).

You have an odd fascination with other people’s handbags.

Anyway, we live in Bethesda and I can assure you many in our public elementary school could afford private. I find the llack of economic diversity to be one of the downsides. I never noticed anyone’s purse ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does anyone know anyone who is truly wealthy/old money who sends their kid to public school? I have not seen it, no matter how much lip service is paid to public education. This is excluding very small annexed/enclave districts; there could be a couple there.

No, and they are the same Republicans who want to slash taxes and create a voucher system. It is inconceivable to them that 1) anyone would prefer a public school who had a choice, and 2) anyone who loves their children and values education might not be able to afford private school. So, bleed the public schools dry and leave them to the poor who deserve what leavings they get.

At least, that's what I think the plan is.

Actually, they vote Democrat, too...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I clearly did touch a nerve. Predictably I suppose.

I want to clarify that what I find odd is not that there are SOME wealthy families who send their kids to public school, but that there’s a particular obsession at some public schools with being flashy. YSL handbags are like the least expensive designer handbags you can buy - but people buy them in part because they scream “I’m expensive” even to those who know nothing about handbags. And I guess I don’t understand that mentality - wanting to look expensive to strangers - when MOST of those women are not super wealthy. And most wealthy women I know don’t carry an entry-level YSL logo handbag.

Anyway, i don’t really understand what it is I’m getting at, but this thread is helping me realize it’s less about school choice and more about displays of wealth and their meaning that I find confusing, and interesting, particularly in certain subcultures (where half the moms carry the same handbag).

At this point you should just name the school that you are talking about.

Oh, I think we all know which school OP is talking about.

[Anonymous]

I was talking to a mom from a public ES one afternoon while we were waiting for our kids and she told me that when they had their new house build, she had an entire room put together just to display her handbags. I'm serious. She was telling the wrong person though because all I could think was "WHY?" its just so boring, its not like it was a library or a sculpture room or a room displaying paintings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I clearly did touch a nerve. Predictably I suppose.

I want to clarify that what I find odd is not that there are SOME wealthy families who send their kids to public school, but that there’s a particular obsession at some public schools with being flashy. YSL handbags are like the least expensive designer handbags you can buy - but people buy them in part because they scream “I’m expensive” even to those who know nothing about handbags. And I guess I don’t understand that mentality - wanting to look expensive to strangers - when MOST of those women are not super wealthy. And most wealthy women I know don’t carry an entry-level YSL logo handbag.

Anyway, i don’t really understand what it is I’m getting at, but this thread is helping me realize it’s less about school choice and more about displays of wealth and their meaning that I find confusing, and interesting, particularly in certain subcultures (where half the moms carry the same handbag).

You have an odd fascination with other people’s handbags.

Anyway, we live in Bethesda and I can assure you many in our public elementary school could afford private. I find the llack of economic diversity to be one of the downsides. I never noticed anyone’s purse ?

I was just about to say the same thing. What's up with handbags?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was talking to a mom from a public ES one afternoon while we were waiting for our kids and she told me that when they had their new house build, she had an entire room put together just to display her handbags. I'm serious. She was telling the wrong person though because all I could think was "WHY?" its just so boring, its not like it was a library or a sculpture room or a room displaying paintings.

Name the ES, or it didn't happen. I'm serious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I clearly did touch a nerve. Predictably I suppose.

I want to clarify that what I find odd is not that there are SOME wealthy families who send their kids to public school, but that there’s a particular obsession at some public schools with being flashy. YSL handbags are like the least expensive designer handbags you can buy - but people buy them in part because they scream “I’m expensive” even to those who know nothing about handbags. And I guess I don’t understand that mentality - wanting to look expensive to strangers - when MOST of those women are not super wealthy. And most wealthy women I know don’t carry an entry-level YSL logo handbag.

Anyway, i don’t really understand what it is I’m getting at, but this thread is helping me realize it’s less about school choice and more about displays of wealth and their meaning that I find confusing, and interesting, particularly in certain subcultures (where half the moms carry the same handbag).

At this point you should just name the school that you are talking about.

Oh, I think we all know which school OP is talking about.

I don't! I'm a public school parent in MoCo, and I've never seen anyone carry a YSL purse at our school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm in N. Arlington and frankly there are a lot of moms of a certain type: they all have YSL logo handbags, huge diamond rings and other expensive jewelry, often blonde hair, expensive clothing, etc. And they all send their kids to public school.

The thing that I find weird is not just that they spend a lot of money on things other than tuition (private school is crazy expensive, and I understand the choice to go public) but that they seem to spend money on things that make them LOOK wealthy but they are obviously not that wealthy since their kids go public. I see a lot of expensive handbags at my kids' private school, but they are almost always Celine or Tod's or Ferragamo or other less flashy brands than a YSL logo, and plenty of the richest families drive a minivan (so practical, no matter how lame) whereas these public school moms in N. Arlington are so often in flashier luxury cars.

I'm trying hard not be judgmental, but I just don't understand the culture of being really flashy with money (I mean, I don't like YSL handbags for that reason to begin with) and I especially don't understand it among people who send their kids to public school.

I'm sure I hit a lot of buttons with this post, I'm just wondering if anyone else has observed what I have.

Maybe they like their public schools and their choices make them feel good

Ie they like their blonde hair and expensive bags


Why do you care? Not a blonde, dont live in north arlington and dont care about flaunting anything.

[Anonymous]

I wonder how OP would analyze someone who is cheap and non-materialistic yet splurges on private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how OP would analyze someone who is cheap and non-materialistic yet splurges on private school?

I was thinking this too! How about me, OP? I am pretty much like the PP above describes. I have two kids, each in a different private school. I carry around a bag I bought from the seasonal section of Michael's for $3. Hmmm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how OP would analyze someone who is cheap and non-materialistic yet splurges on private school?

I was thinking this too! How about me, OP? I am pretty much like the PP above describes. I have two kids, each in a different private school. I carry around a bag I bought from the seasonal section of Michael's for $3. Hmmm.

OP may assume we receive financial aid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was talking to a mom from a public ES one afternoon while we were waiting for our kids and she told me that when they had their new house build, she had an entire room put together just to display her handbags. I'm serious. She was telling the wrong person though because all I could think was "WHY?" its just so boring, its not like it was a library or a sculpture room or a room displaying paintings.

Name the ES, or it didn't happen. I'm serious.

Jamestown, duh.

[Anonymous]

what is wrong with being blonde? My hair is so white now its the only shade I can color it. And I'm in my 40s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was talking to a mom from a public ES one afternoon while we were waiting for our kids and she told me that when they had their new house build, she had an entire room put together just to display her handbags. I'm serious. She was telling the wrong person though because all I could think was "WHY?" its just so boring, its not like it was a library or a sculpture room or a room displaying paintings.

Name the ES, or it didn't happen. I'm serious.

Interesting logic. What are you, 11 years old?

[Anonymous]

What about sending your kids to an academically weak private school that's worse than the publics? Because you want them to not worry about school and just have fun with other rich kids? That was pretty common where I grew up.