Do women love their kids more than their husbands ?

[Anonymous]

i love my children more, but that's in part because DH was not my first love, or my second--our marriage is based on friendship and trust and was never a passionate-in-love relationship. I knew that walking in and that was the choice I made, because of where I was in my life and what my options were.

That said, I am surprised that few posters have mentioned that I love my DH MORE because we had children, not less. Having kids together has been a wonderful bond, not just because of the kids themselves but because it's helped us see a new side of each other and ourselves. And I love that, I love seeing the sacrifices we both make and how we really try our best, and how children bring out more of the playfulness in both of us after a really long day. That is a huge part of what the joy of parenting has been for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:i love my children more, but that's in part because DH was not my first love, or my second--our marriage is based on friendship and trust and was never a passionate-in-love relationship. I knew that walking in and that was the choice I made, because of where I was in my life and what my options were.

That said, I am surprised that few posters have mentioned that I love my DH MORE because we had children, not less. Having kids together has been a wonderful bond, not just because of the kids themselves but because it's helped us see a new side of each other and ourselves. And I love that, I love seeing the sacrifices we both make and how we really try our best, and how children bring out more of the playfulness in both of us after a really long day. That is a huge part of what the joy of parenting has been for me.

How would your marriage survive after kids move out ?
I have seen too many marriage broke down after kids leave the house as they made their lives all about kids.

[Anonymous]

I can't believe there are really people who think in these zero-sum terms (unless they're writing about it to sell books, in which case please omit the anal beads reference because that is too, too TMI). It is DIFFERENT. It is not a competition.

[Anonymous]

If I had to choose my kids v husband in a life or death situation, I would choose kids. My husband would too if the roles were reversed and I would be happy he made that decision. I would immediately divorce him if he chose me over the kids. I think most husbands love the kids more than their wives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I had to choose my kids v husband in a life or death situation, I would choose kids. My husband would too if the roles were reversed and I would be happy he made that decision. I would immediately divorce him if he chose me over the kids. I think most husbands love the kids more than their wives.

But that TED talk said otherwise.

[Anonymous]

I equated this question to the one that goes something to the effect of "If your spouse and your child were drowning and you could only save one, who would you save?"
I can't remember where I first heard it, but supposedly most mothers say they would save their child and most fathers say they would save their wife.

[Anonymous]

DH and I definitely love each other more than our kids, but then we were together for 12 years before we had our kids. We totally love our kids, but sometimes they're less than adorable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:i love my children more, but that's in part because DH was not my first love, or my second--our marriage is based on friendship and trust and was never a passionate-in-love relationship. I knew that walking in and that was the choice I made, because of where I was in my life and what my options were.

That said, I am surprised that few posters have mentioned that I love my DH MORE because we had children, not less. Having kids together has been a wonderful bond, not just because of the kids themselves but because it's helped us see a new side of each other and ourselves. And I love that, I love seeing the sacrifices we both make and how we really try our best, and how children bring out more of the playfulness in both of us after a really long day. That is a huge part of what the joy of parenting has been for me.

I wonder, did your DH know this was how you felt?

[Anonymous]

I definately love my husband more than anything. I adore and love my kids too but i want them to find the same love when they grow up.

[Anonymous]

Love is a zero sum game

[Anonymous]

It is a different kind of love, I honestly can't compare which is more because they are different. I believe my DH does love me unconditionally in a different way that my kids do and vice versa. I believe sustaining both kinds are equally important. Also because I want my children to grow up in a stable home I value supporting and strengthening my marriage.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, the two kinds of love are so different, it's hard to compare them. My husband is my partner, my equal, my friend, my support. My daughter is dependent on me. I met my husband as an adult and we chose each other. My daughter grew under my heart and we met the day she was born. What would it even mean to say I loved one "more" than the other?

[Anonymous]

BOTH.
Its possible to love both of them just as much

[Anonymous]

Different kind of love

[Anonymous]

Love grows. It does not diminish. So no, I love both of them the same.