I’ve never had a therapist that helped me with much

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How hard do you actually work on yourself and the issues the therapists bring up. A couple bad therapists is one thing. Multiple therapists and none helping usually means the problem lies with you.

Therapists don't actually do anything. It isn't surprising that they aren't going to help.

Therapists hold a mirror up which can reveal your maladaptive thoughts, behaviors and coping mechanisms. They can teach you healthier coping mechanisms and tools and skills for managing your emotions. Most of the work is done by the client outside of therapy where you employ those skills and tools. If you don't like/believe in/trust therapy, then don't go. It takes a desire and commitment to change and the strength to admit what role you play in your own issues for therapy to work.

Unfortunately, it has become more common for therapists to “validate” distortions in thinking and their related emotions. There is less interest in hearing from family members as a balance to the patient’s perceptions. Finally, the industry has contributed to the pathologizing of normal experiences and emotions. No, it isn’t “trauma” when your mom yelled at you for not cleaning your room. Yes, it is normal to be sad when you divorce. - MSW

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This tracks. Most people would be better served spending the time exercising, massage or volunteering.

The main issue I see is that talking to a therapist increases dopamine regarding a problem, and makes your brain focus on it even more to get that hit.

Who are you to decide what most people should do?

Someone who has been sexually assaulted, lost a spouse or child, or been given a difficult diagnosis may already be doing some of the activities you mentioned.

It’s not an either/or proposition, and given the lack of empathy being expressed by many posters, it’s understandable why the use of therapy is rising.

Your post reaffirms the person who said that therapy is replacing religion. Nothing a therapist says can make you feel better about a death or diagnosis. There are emotions you need to feel and endure before you feel better. They can point this out, but you are the one who must do it (and you can’t really control it). I guess sexual abuse could be one place where it might be helpful, but again it is mostly an outsider repeating that it wasn’t your fault.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This tracks. Most people would be better served spending the time exercising, massage or volunteering.

The main issue I see is that talking to a therapist increases dopamine regarding a problem, and makes your brain focus on it even more to get that hit.

Who are you to decide what most people should do?

Someone who has been sexually assaulted, lost a spouse or child, or been given a difficult diagnosis may already be doing some of the activities you mentioned.

It’s not an either/or proposition, and given the lack of empathy being expressed by many posters, it’s understandable why the use of therapy is rising.

Your post reaffirms the person who said that therapy is replacing religion. Nothing a therapist says can make you feel better about a death or diagnosis. There are emotions you need to feel and endure before you feel better. They can point this out, but you are the one who must do it (and you can’t really control it). I guess sexual abuse could be one place where it might be helpful, but again it is mostly an outsider repeating that it wasn’t your fault.

That’s…not how therapy works at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve had individual therapy and couples therapy and tried different types of therapies.

What am I doing wrong? Am I just too messed up to help?

My issues are generalized anxiety, social anxiety and anger issues.

So don't go see the rapist.