DUI and Death on Harrison

[Anonymous]

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The young man who passed away was his parents' only child. So very, very sad.

Yes- basically the same age as this case--only a few months separation in age.

So turning 18 actually has legal consequences? Who knew?

Everyone.

Exactly. I don’t get why people were so upset that they treated the minor…as a minor.

That’s how it works.

It may have been the technically correct decision to try him as a minor, but it doesn't take much imagination to understand why people wanted his adult conduct to be met with adult consequence, especially given that he was almost 18.

It wasn’t adult conduct, by definition. Teens can do terrible things before they turn 18, but that doesn’t generally result in their being charged as adults. In this case, the driver is legally an adult, and that has different consequences under the law.

Oh stop with your definitions.I know this case is different from a legal standpoint. I'm just talking about why many people were upset when the other almost-adult had almost no consequences. That's why in my first post I said "technically" correct. We all saw what he did, and this wasn't some little kid just using bad judgment. It wasn't even just drunk driving. It was drunk driving and deciding to speed like a maniac. It was egregious. This was an almost-man taking a stranger's life engaging in reckless conduct that goes beyond just having a drink and getting behind the wheel. That's why it felt outrageous. I'm not trying to win the argument in court - I'm talking about why people were outraged.

What was outrageous was a handful of people expecting the law to be disregarded and for a minor to be treated like an adult because the victim and his parents were from their own social circle. They tried to make it into a basis to unseat county officials who were just doing their jobs and following the law, and failed.

In this case the alleged drunk driver is legally an adult, so it will be handled differently.

We’re never going to agree on this one. Almost 18 year olds are frequently tried as adults under egregious circumstances. This particular juvenile killed a child. The prosecutor stuck to her promise and tried him as a juvenile. Nothing outrageous about the community disagreeing with her decision and expressing a view about how an elected official carries out her duties.

Not in Arlington.
Not without prior record.
Not without the intent to harm others.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:None of your business.

He killed someone on a public street. It is very much our business. By definition. This is not a private affair.

Whether or not a teenager is on suicide, watch (as was asked) is none of your business whether or not they committed a crime on a public street.

Bullshit. I am entitled by right to know the details of this case. If he's a suicide risk and that's the reason bond is being denied, I have a right to know. You can eff right off with that bullshit.

No, you are not “entitled” to any of that info.

WTF is wrong with you?

I sure am. By law, anything in court is public record. What is wrong with YOU? Are you just naturally stupid or poorly educated or what?

Not true.

Anything said in open court absolutely is public record. Filings are public record. Even discovery is public record. Only things under seal are not public record.

You seem to believe the victim and/or his family deserve privacy. They do not. They DO deserve a good, publish shaming, however.

The accused murdered is legally entitled to the same rights as any other criminal suspect, but we the people have a right to know the details of the proceedings, including the particulars of why bond may or may not be granted.

Shame the driver…sure. But the family doesn’t deserve to be abused online. As stated in this post, he is an adult not a child. Stop dragging the family through the mud for his poor choices.

His family isn’t being abused here, and was not being abused on the prior thread. No one posted parent names. No one posted even a public social media profile.

This legal adult killed someone.

Yeah, you missed a few things. On the other thread someone posted where the mom worked. Pretty awful and immature to do.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Remind your kids not to ever get in a car with a driver who has been drinking. Uber. Walk. Call your mommy.
4 people got into that car as passengers.

Yup. And wear your freaking seatbelt.

So many bad decisions that night.

It was more than 4. I know of at least one passenger who was dropped off just before they crashed. Every single person who got in that car that night made a horrible decision, not just the driver.

Exactly.

You are allowed to be drunk and a passenger in a car. It can show poor judgement of course. It is in no way on any planet with sane people analogous to driving while drunk. Come on lady.

You have no idea why that kid ended up behind the wheel vs any of the other kids.

You need to say more about why this is important to you. You’re getting ripped apart, but there must be some logic to what you’re saying and thinking.

I hate judgmental a-holes jumping to conclusions.

I can see taking that position when people comment on the parents or parenting decisions leading to this moment. No one, even people who knew them in real life, know what went on in their home and in their family. But arguing that particulars of the evening leading up to who drove the car are relevant and may somewhat exonerate the driver is not a winning argument.

No good comes from jumping to conclusions.

Certainly not when there are crazies trying to publicly shame anyone they can.

I guess we'll agree to disagree because I think focusing your energy on defending an 18 year old drunk driver is morally repugnant. And I wonder if he didn't look like what he looked like and wasn't from where he's from if you would feel this passionately about not jumping to conclusions. But there I go jumping to conclusions about you.

No one is defending him. He should be held accountable for his actions. But that is for the judge/judicial system to decide. Not some angry mob of people who care more about “publicly shaming the family” than waiting for facts.

DP, I don't think you understand. We're judging him and ALL drunk drivers, the same way we judge people who shoot a loaded gun into a crowd. Because this behavior puts us ALL at risk.

I will unequivocally judge ALL drunk drivers (and people who drive high), because it is such a needless, selfish danger to all of us.

Shooting a loaded gun into a room? So irrational. There just aren’t that many drunk drivers these days.

Now texting and driving - there is a major concern for safety. It happens constantly everywhere. Take all of that hostile Karen energy and do something about texting behind the wheel.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:None of your business.

He killed someone on a public street. It is very much our business. By definition. This is not a private affair.

Whether or not a teenager is on suicide, watch (as was asked) is none of your business whether or not they committed a crime on a public street.

Bullshit. I am entitled by right to know the details of this case. If he's a suicide risk and that's the reason bond is being denied, I have a right to know. You can eff right off with that bullshit.

No, you are not “entitled” to any of that info.

WTF is wrong with you?

I sure am. By law, anything in court is public record. What is wrong with YOU? Are you just naturally stupid or poorly educated or what?

Not true.

Anything said in open court absolutely is public record. Filings are public record. Even discovery is public record. Only things under seal are not public record.

You seem to believe the victim and/or his family deserve privacy. They do not. They DO deserve a good, publish shaming, however.

The accused murdered is legally entitled to the same rights as any other criminal suspect, but we the people have a right to know the details of the proceedings, including the particulars of why bond may or may not be granted.

Shame the driver…sure. But the family doesn’t deserve to be abused online. As stated in this post, he is an adult not a child. Stop dragging the family through the mud for his poor choices.

His family isn’t being abused here, and was not being abused on the prior thread. No one posted parent names. No one posted even a public social media profile.

This legal adult killed someone.

Yeah, you missed a few things. On the other thread someone posted where the mom worked. Pretty awful and immature to do.

And they were posting other details about their lives. Creepy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Remind your kids not to ever get in a car with a driver who has been drinking. Uber. Walk. Call your mommy.
4 people got into that car as passengers.

Yup. And wear your freaking seatbelt.

So many bad decisions that night.

It was more than 4. I know of at least one passenger who was dropped off just before they crashed. Every single person who got in that car that night made a horrible decision, not just the driver.

Exactly.

You are allowed to be drunk and a passenger in a car. It can show poor judgement of course. It is in no way on any planet with sane people analogous to driving while drunk. Come on lady.

You have no idea why that kid ended up behind the wheel vs any of the other kids.

You need to say more about why this is important to you. You’re getting ripped apart, but there must be some logic to what you’re saying and thinking.

I hate judgmental a-holes jumping to conclusions.

I can see taking that position when people comment on the parents or parenting decisions leading to this moment. No one, even people who knew them in real life, know what went on in their home and in their family. But arguing that particulars of the evening leading up to who drove the car are relevant and may somewhat exonerate the driver is not a winning argument.

No good comes from jumping to conclusions.

Certainly not when there are crazies trying to publicly shame anyone they can.

I guess we'll agree to disagree because I think focusing your energy on defending an 18 year old drunk driver is morally repugnant. And I wonder if he didn't look like what he looked like and wasn't from where he's from if you would feel this passionately about not jumping to conclusions. But there I go jumping to conclusions about you.

No one is defending him. He should be held accountable for his actions. But that is for the judge/judicial system to decide. Not some angry mob of people who care more about “publicly shaming the family” than waiting for facts.

DP, I don't think you understand. We're judging him and ALL drunk drivers, the same way we judge people who shoot a loaded gun into a crowd. Because this behavior puts us ALL at risk.

I will unequivocally judge ALL drunk drivers (and people who drive high), because it is such a needless, selfish danger to all of us.

Shooting a loaded gun into a room? So irrational. There just aren’t that many drunk drivers these days.

Now texting and driving - there is a major concern for safety. It happens constantly everywhere. Take all of that hostile Karen energy and do something about texting behind the wheel.

Are you kidding? There are still a sh!t ton of drivers under the influence. They just didn't kill someone that specific night/day.

And yes of course, using your phone while driving is incredibly dangerous. Believe it or not, you be furious at both deadly habits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:None of your business.

He killed someone on a public street. It is very much our business. By definition. This is not a private affair.

Whether or not a teenager is on suicide, watch (as was asked) is none of your business whether or not they committed a crime on a public street.

Bullshit. I am entitled by right to know the details of this case. If he's a suicide risk and that's the reason bond is being denied, I have a right to know. You can eff right off with that bullshit.

No, you are not “entitled” to any of that info.

WTF is wrong with you?

I sure am. By law, anything in court is public record. What is wrong with YOU? Are you just naturally stupid or poorly educated or what?

Not true.

Anything said in open court absolutely is public record. Filings are public record. Even discovery is public record. Only things under seal are not public record.

You seem to believe the victim and/or his family deserve privacy. They do not. They DO deserve a good, publish shaming, however.

The accused murdered is legally entitled to the same rights as any other criminal suspect, but we the people have a right to know the details of the proceedings, including the particulars of why bond may or may not be granted.

Shame the driver…sure. But the family doesn’t deserve to be abused online. As stated in this post, he is an adult not a child. Stop dragging the family through the mud for his poor choices.

His family isn’t being abused here, and was not being abused on the prior thread. No one posted parent names. No one posted even a public social media profile.

This legal adult killed someone.

They absolutely posted parent names. You do realize that posts get deleted, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We’re right back where we started circa 1989 with alcohol education, PSAs against drunk driving, the MADD lobby, etc. clearly to no avail.

What’s the excuse now? We have enlightened parents (I’m one!) who’ve said for years that should it be unsafe to go home, call/text and we’ll get you, gladly - no questions asked. Or, everyone stays overnight, no questions asked.

Now with ride shares and Uber apps, this is even more tragic. I guarantee if any of those passengers would have texted anyone in their contacts they could have gotten a safe ride home. I would have driven any of these young people home and I’m a total stranger but a mom.

This is why, when all is said and done, the driver is the one who is most at fault and will deserve the consequences. It’s sad all around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Remind your kids not to ever get in a car with a driver who has been drinking. Uber. Walk. Call your mommy.
4 people got into that car as passengers.

Yup. And wear your freaking seatbelt.

So many bad decisions that night.

It was more than 4. I know of at least one passenger who was dropped off just before they crashed. Every single person who got in that car that night made a horrible decision, not just the driver.

Exactly.

You are allowed to be drunk and a passenger in a car. It can show poor judgement of course. It is in no way on any planet with sane people analogous to driving while drunk. Come on lady.

You have no idea why that kid ended up behind the wheel vs any of the other kids.

You need to say more about why this is important to you. You’re getting ripped apart, but there must be some logic to what you’re saying and thinking.

I hate judgmental a-holes jumping to conclusions.

I can see taking that position when people comment on the parents or parenting decisions leading to this moment. No one, even people who knew them in real life, know what went on in their home and in their family. But arguing that particulars of the evening leading up to who drove the car are relevant and may somewhat exonerate the driver is not a winning argument.

No good comes from jumping to conclusions.

Certainly not when there are crazies trying to publicly shame anyone they can.

I guess we'll agree to disagree because I think focusing your energy on defending an 18 year old drunk driver is morally repugnant. And I wonder if he didn't look like what he looked like and wasn't from where he's from if you would feel this passionately about not jumping to conclusions. But there I go jumping to conclusions about you.

No one is defending him. He should be held accountable for his actions. But that is for the judge/judicial system to decide. Not some angry mob of people who care more about “publicly shaming the family” than waiting for facts.

DP, I don't think you understand. We're judging him and ALL drunk drivers, the same way we judge people who shoot a loaded gun into a crowd. Because this behavior puts us ALL at risk.

I will unequivocally judge ALL drunk drivers (and people who drive high), because it is such a needless, selfish danger to all of us.

Shooting a loaded gun into a room? So irrational. There just aren’t that many drunk drivers these days.

Now texting and driving - there is a major concern for safety. It happens constantly everywhere. Take all of that hostile Karen energy and do something about texting behind the wheel.

Are you kidding? There are still a sh!t ton of drivers under the influence. They just didn't kill someone that specific night/day.

And yes of course, using your phone while driving is incredibly dangerous. Believe it or not, you be furious at both deadly habits.

My 7 mile drive to and from the district every.single.morning. I'd say 50% of drivers are on their phones. Many heads full buried in it, not even looking at the road. I've almost been slammed into the back on the 14th st bridge when the speed drops off to traffic. My 17-year old has a Learner's and I've been holding off having him get on the road in this area. Older sib got his during Covid and had about 2 years of full practice before the roads got busy. It is a literal sh*tshow in this area.

[Anonymous]

[list]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Remind your kids not to ever get in a car with a driver who has been drinking. Uber. Walk. Call your mommy.
4 people got into that car as passengers.

Yup. And wear your freaking seatbelt.

So many bad decisions that night.

It was more than 4. I know of at least one passenger who was dropped off just before they crashed. Every single person who got in that car that night made a horrible decision, not just the driver.

Exactly.

You are allowed to be drunk and a passenger in a car. It can show poor judgement of course. It is in no way on any planet with sane people analogous to driving while drunk. Come on lady.

You have no idea why that kid ended up behind the wheel vs any of the other kids.

You need to say more about why this is important to you. You’re getting ripped apart, but there must be some logic to what you’re saying and thinking.

I hate judgmental a-holes jumping to conclusions.

I can see taking that position when people comment on the parents or parenting decisions leading to this moment. No one, even people who knew them in real life, know what went on in their home and in their family. But arguing that particulars of the evening leading up to who drove the car are relevant and may somewhat exonerate the driver is not a winning argument.

No good comes from jumping to conclusions.

Certainly not when there are crazies trying to publicly shame anyone they can.

I guess we'll agree to disagree because I think focusing your energy on defending an 18 year old drunk driver is morally repugnant. And I wonder if he didn't look like what he looked like and wasn't from where he's from if you would feel this passionately about not jumping to conclusions. But there I go jumping to conclusions about you.

No one is defending him. He should be held accountable for his actions. But that is for the judge/judicial system to decide. Not some angry mob of people who care more about “publicly shaming the family” than waiting for facts.

DP, I don't think you understand. We're judging him and ALL drunk drivers, the same way we judge people who shoot a loaded gun into a crowd. Because this behavior puts us ALL at risk.

I will unequivocally judge ALL drunk drivers (and people who drive high), because it is such a needless, selfish danger to all of us.

Shooting a loaded gun into a room? So irrational. There just aren’t that many drunk drivers these days.

Um, it happens just about every week at a school somewhere in America.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re right back where we started circa 1989 with alcohol education, PSAs against drunk driving, the MADD lobby, etc. clearly to no avail.

What’s the excuse now? We have enlightened parents (I’m one!) who’ve said for years that should it be unsafe to go home, call/text and we’ll get you, gladly - no questions asked. Or, everyone stays overnight, no questions asked.

Now with ride shares and Uber apps, this is even more tragic. I guarantee if any of those passengers would have texted anyone in their contacts they could have gotten a safe ride home. I would have driven any of these young people home and I’m a total stranger but a mom.

This is why, when all is said and done, the driver is the one who is most at fault and will deserve the consequences. It’s sad all around.

I do think the 'college factor' played big into this. Away for college for 6 weeks---and then reunited. Please everyone be careful at Tgiving-holiday break with new college students for the same reason. They haven't been under your roof--and they have likely been exposed to big time drinking when they had no cars (freshmen can't) and get back to town and reunited trading stories and acting like 'adults with more freedoms since not in HS anymore. College campuses aren't 'real' places. What goes on there doesn't have a place here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:[list]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Remind your kids not to ever get in a car with a driver who has been drinking. Uber. Walk. Call your mommy.
4 people got into that car as passengers.

Yup. And wear your freaking seatbelt.

So many bad decisions that night.

It was more than 4. I know of at least one passenger who was dropped off just before they crashed. Every single person who got in that car that night made a horrible decision, not just the driver.

Exactly.

You are allowed to be drunk and a passenger in a car. It can show poor judgement of course. It is in no way on any planet with sane people analogous to driving while drunk. Come on lady.

You have no idea why that kid ended up behind the wheel vs any of the other kids.

You need to say more about why this is important to you. You’re getting ripped apart, but there must be some logic to what you’re saying and thinking.

I hate judgmental a-holes jumping to conclusions.

I can see taking that position when people comment on the parents or parenting decisions leading to this moment. No one, even people who knew them in real life, know what went on in their home and in their family. But arguing that particulars of the evening leading up to who drove the car are relevant and may somewhat exonerate the driver is not a winning argument.

No good comes from jumping to conclusions.

Certainly not when there are crazies trying to publicly shame anyone they can.

I guess we'll agree to disagree because I think focusing your energy on defending an 18 year old drunk driver is morally repugnant. And I wonder if he didn't look like what he looked like and wasn't from where he's from if you would feel this passionately about not jumping to conclusions. But there I go jumping to conclusions about you.

No one is defending him. He should be held accountable for his actions. But that is for the judge/judicial system to decide. Not some angry mob of people who care more about “publicly shaming the family” than waiting for facts.

DP, I don't think you understand. We're judging him and ALL drunk drivers, the same way we judge people who shoot a loaded gun into a crowd. Because this behavior puts us ALL at risk.

I will unequivocally judge ALL drunk drivers (and people who drive high), because it is such a needless, selfish danger to all of us.

Shooting a loaded gun into a room? So irrational. There just aren’t that many drunk drivers these days.

Um, it happens just about every week at a school somewhere in America.

And yet it used to be way way more common. Kids don’t drive as much. Or drink. We have Uber. DUIs are a major stigma now.

Texting on the other hand is out of control.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[list]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Remind your kids not to ever get in a car with a driver who has been drinking. Uber. Walk. Call your mommy.
4 people got into that car as passengers.

Yup. And wear your freaking seatbelt.

So many bad decisions that night.

It was more than 4. I know of at least one passenger who was dropped off just before they crashed. Every single person who got in that car that night made a horrible decision, not just the driver.

Exactly.

You are allowed to be drunk and a passenger in a car. It can show poor judgement of course. It is in no way on any planet with sane people analogous to driving while drunk. Come on lady.

You have no idea why that kid ended up behind the wheel vs any of the other kids.

You need to say more about why this is important to you. You’re getting ripped apart, but there must be some logic to what you’re saying and thinking.

I hate judgmental a-holes jumping to conclusions.

I can see taking that position when people comment on the parents or parenting decisions leading to this moment. No one, even people who knew them in real life, know what went on in their home and in their family. But arguing that particulars of the evening leading up to who drove the car are relevant and may somewhat exonerate the driver is not a winning argument.

No good comes from jumping to conclusions.

Certainly not when there are crazies trying to publicly shame anyone they can.

I guess we'll agree to disagree because I think focusing your energy on defending an 18 year old drunk driver is morally repugnant. And I wonder if he didn't look like what he looked like and wasn't from where he's from if you would feel this passionately about not jumping to conclusions. But there I go jumping to conclusions about you.

No one is defending him. He should be held accountable for his actions. But that is for the judge/judicial system to decide. Not some angry mob of people who care more about “publicly shaming the family” than waiting for facts.

DP, I don't think you understand. We're judging him and ALL drunk drivers, the same way we judge people who shoot a loaded gun into a crowd. Because this behavior puts us ALL at risk.

I will unequivocally judge ALL drunk drivers (and people who drive high), because it is such a needless, selfish danger to all of us.

Shooting a loaded gun into a room? So irrational. There just aren’t that many drunk drivers these days.

Um, it happens just about every week at a school somewhere in America.

And yet it used to be way way more common. Kids don’t drive as much. Or drink. We have Uber. DUIs are a major stigma now.

Texting on the other hand is out of control.

It comes across as bad faith to the point of a rather disgusting cruelty to me, if to no one else, that you keep trying to switch the conversation to bad driving habits as opposed to the relevant issue: a drunk driver who killed his friend and imperiled anyone else on the road with him. No one wrote “texting while driving is ok.” No one is proposing extrajudicial justice, or violence. You and your ilk can scream otherwise here but it really reads like defensive moms of teen boys they can’t quite trust. Who they never really pushed to thinking about other people from early childhood forward. It is what it is.

[Anonymous]

Wait till the civil suits and insurance fights from families of the killed and injured and the totalled row of cars. Whoever/however they got the alcohol better have resources or flee

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[list]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Remind your kids not to ever get in a car with a driver who has been drinking. Uber. Walk. Call your mommy.
4 people got into that car as passengers.

Yup. And wear your freaking seatbelt.

So many bad decisions that night.

It was more than 4. I know of at least one passenger who was dropped off just before they crashed. Every single person who got in that car that night made a horrible decision, not just the driver.

Exactly.

You are allowed to be drunk and a passenger in a car. It can show poor judgement of course. It is in no way on any planet with sane people analogous to driving while drunk. Come on lady.

You have no idea why that kid ended up behind the wheel vs any of the other kids.

You need to say more about why this is important to you. You’re getting ripped apart, but there must be some logic to what you’re saying and thinking.

I hate judgmental a-holes jumping to conclusions.

I can see taking that position when people comment on the parents or parenting decisions leading to this moment. No one, even people who knew them in real life, know what went on in their home and in their family. But arguing that particulars of the evening leading up to who drove the car are relevant and may somewhat exonerate the driver is not a winning argument.

No good comes from jumping to conclusions.

Certainly not when there are crazies trying to publicly shame anyone they can.

I guess we'll agree to disagree because I think focusing your energy on defending an 18 year old drunk driver is morally repugnant. And I wonder if he didn't look like what he looked like and wasn't from where he's from if you would feel this passionately about not jumping to conclusions. But there I go jumping to conclusions about you.

No one is defending him. He should be held accountable for his actions. But that is for the judge/judicial system to decide. Not some angry mob of people who care more about “publicly shaming the family” than waiting for facts.

DP, I don't think you understand. We're judging him and ALL drunk drivers, the same way we judge people who shoot a loaded gun into a crowd. Because this behavior puts us ALL at risk.

I will unequivocally judge ALL drunk drivers (and people who drive high), because it is such a needless, selfish danger to all of us.

Shooting a loaded gun into a room? So irrational. There just aren’t that many drunk drivers these days.

Um, it happens just about every week at a school somewhere in America.

And yet it used to be way way more common. Kids don’t drive as much. Or drink. We have Uber. DUIs are a major stigma now.

Texting on the other hand is out of control.

I was talking, of course, about school shootings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[list]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Remind your kids not to ever get in a car with a driver who has been drinking. Uber. Walk. Call your mommy.
4 people got into that car as passengers.

Yup. And wear your freaking seatbelt.

So many bad decisions that night.

It was more than 4. I know of at least one passenger who was dropped off just before they crashed. Every single person who got in that car that night made a horrible decision, not just the driver.

Exactly.

You are allowed to be drunk and a passenger in a car. It can show poor judgement of course. It is in no way on any planet with sane people analogous to driving while drunk. Come on lady.

You have no idea why that kid ended up behind the wheel vs any of the other kids.

You need to say more about why this is important to you. You’re getting ripped apart, but there must be some logic to what you’re saying and thinking.

I hate judgmental a-holes jumping to conclusions.

I can see taking that position when people comment on the parents or parenting decisions leading to this moment. No one, even people who knew them in real life, know what went on in their home and in their family. But arguing that particulars of the evening leading up to who drove the car are relevant and may somewhat exonerate the driver is not a winning argument.

No good comes from jumping to conclusions.

Certainly not when there are crazies trying to publicly shame anyone they can.

I guess we'll agree to disagree because I think focusing your energy on defending an 18 year old drunk driver is morally repugnant. And I wonder if he didn't look like what he looked like and wasn't from where he's from if you would feel this passionately about not jumping to conclusions. But there I go jumping to conclusions about you.

No one is defending him. He should be held accountable for his actions. But that is for the judge/judicial system to decide. Not some angry mob of people who care more about “publicly shaming the family” than waiting for facts.

DP, I don't think you understand. We're judging him and ALL drunk drivers, the same way we judge people who shoot a loaded gun into a crowd. Because this behavior puts us ALL at risk.

I will unequivocally judge ALL drunk drivers (and people who drive high), because it is such a needless, selfish danger to all of us.

Shooting a loaded gun into a room? So irrational. There just aren’t that many drunk drivers these days.

Um, it happens just about every week at a school somewhere in America.

And yet it used to be way way more common. Kids don’t drive as much. Or drink. We have Uber. DUIs are a major stigma now.

Texting on the other hand is out of control.

It comes across as bad faith to the point of a rather disgusting cruelty to me, if to no one else, that you keep trying to switch the conversation to bad driving habits as opposed to the relevant issue: a drunk driver who killed his friend and imperiled anyone else on the road with him. No one wrote “texting while driving is ok.” No one is proposing extrajudicial justice, or violence. You and your ilk can scream otherwise here but it really reads like defensive moms of teen boys they can’t quite trust. Who they never really pushed to thinking about other people from early childhood forward. It is what it is.

Yeah, trying to wrangle texting and driving into this discussion is absurd.