Bragging about tall kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of us brag occasionally and get humbled just as much. It's the human condition. I don't mind hearing it and while I have a just below avg. height middle schooler, I do marvel at and remark on the growth of other kids because it never ceases to amaze me how kids grow so quickly.

It used to make my eyes roll back to hear "dd/ds is just so blonde and has beautiful blue eyes blah blah blah everyone one in *insert foreign country* wants to touch them..." But once I had kids of my own, I get being in awe of your own precious child's attributes. It's good to take note of these reminders not to brag but I think it's OK to let people toot their horn occasionally when we have plenty of other obstacles to face.

Ha! I had that blond kid, actually two of them, close in age. The amount of attention they got was astounding! It was actually pretty annoying, and sometimes intrusive too (like when people ran after us or grabbed our babies). I didn’t get it at the time, and found answering the same questions again and again mostly from strangers pretty tiresome (but you always have to be polite) but now they are older looking back at photos I get that they did look more dramatic? Noticeable?

You make good points though, but I wonder how much of this is driven by comments from strangers anyway. People comment on remarkable height like they do on remarkable features.

Blonde hair as a child is not remarkable in America. I understand if you’re in another country, maybe, but not here. My son had beautiful white blonde hair and the only unusual thing was people assumed he was a girl, even at five years old. Hair wasted on a boy. No one wanted to touch his hair.

I’m the PP you are responding to. In this area blond hair is not common, as evidenced by the experience I had with my kids. I guess you are somewhere or some DC suburb with lots of white people. We’re in DC and I could always pick my kids out in a crowd of children because of their remarkably blond hair. They would literally be the only ones. There might be a couple of others with dirty blond hair but never mistakable with mine. Now when we would travel to my home country, blond kids were everywhere. On the flip side in Mexico crowds formed to stare at them! They are still blond now in high school but not as dramatically so.

About 5.5% of Americans have naturally blond hair. Only red hair is less common. Everyone I know with red head kids gets comments all day long about their kid’s hair color. PP must live in northern Minnesota or something to think it’s not remarkable.

Kids though?? It is way higher. Many many many Caucasian kids have very blonde hair as young kids. I had white blonde hair as a toddler/young child and it turned dark brown by the time I finished puberty. Extremely common.

Way higher? Prove it.

Toddlers, maybe, but still not many in this area where many families are not white or of multiple races. Kids 6-10 with dramatically blond hair? Rare in DC. Teens and older like that? Almost unheard of with the exception of albinism (Also almost unheard of)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, social media is not for you.

+1. Your problem is not your boys height, it's your insecurity about it and your investment in his status

Truth

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m not bragging about his feet so much as looking for sympathy. Size 14 shoes are hard to find in stores and expensive AF.

And as a PP said, he’s just really freaking tall. It’s an objective fact. And your son may be kinder or smarter than him, but he’s definitely not going to be taller than him.

You’re the one making a big deal out of it.

Truth. Thankfully we have the internet. My son also wears size 14 shoes and they are especially hard to find when they want a certain brand. I just ordered a specific pair of slides that ran small in 15s.

I’m not bragging but happy if I talk about it. He was 5’2 for most of middle school and self conscious.

If he was 5’2” in middle school he was right in the middle of the pack and had nothing to be self conscious about.

My son was 5’3” at 13 and Tanner 2 for puberty. He ended up being 6’. He was always in the 50 - 75%tile. Always rolling along in the middle. Perfect place to be in my opinion.

Come on, you say that as a rational adult. As a parent you understand kids are always self conscious. When he was the average middle school kid he only saw the tall kids. Now that he’s the tall kid, he isn’t noticing that, but only hearing about the ones bragging about having 4.5 and 1600 SAT scores and D1 recruits as college applications approach. He doesn’t have anything like that academically or athletically. Kids will always be self conscious about something.

My 12 year old daughter is an average 5’5”, no period yet and is right in the middle of the pack. There are a handful of tall boys compared to the vast majority of boys who haven’t grown yet. Most of the boys are still short. To look at the tiny minority of boys who have sprouted early and feel self conscious doesn’t even make sense. What you describe is envy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m not bragging about his feet so much as looking for sympathy. Size 14 shoes are hard to find in stores and expensive AF.

And as a PP said, he’s just really freaking tall. It’s an objective fact. And your son may be kinder or smarter than him, but he’s definitely not going to be taller than him.

You’re the one making a big deal out of it.

Truth. Thankfully we have the internet. My son also wears size 14 shoes and they are especially hard to find when they want a certain brand. I just ordered a specific pair of slides that ran small in 15s.

I’m not bragging but happy if I talk about it. He was 5’2 for most of middle school and self conscious.

If he was 5’2” in middle school he was right in the middle of the pack and had nothing to be self conscious about.

My son was 5’3” at 13 and Tanner 2 for puberty. He ended up being 6’. He was always in the 50 - 75%tile. Always rolling along in the middle. Perfect place to be in my opinion.

Come on, you say that as a rational adult. As a parent you understand kids are always self conscious. When he was the average middle school kid he only saw the tall kids. Now that he’s the tall kid, he isn’t noticing that, but only hearing about the ones bragging about having 4.5 and 1600 SAT scores and D1 recruits as college applications approach. He doesn’t have anything like that academically or athletically. Kids will always be self conscious about something.

My 12 year old daughter is an average 5’5”, no period yet and is right in the middle of the pack. There are a handful of tall boys compared to the vast majority of boys who haven’t grown yet. Most of the boys are still short. To look at the tiny minority of boys who have sprouted early and feel self conscious doesn’t even make sense. What you describe is envy.

+1

I have two teen sons, and most boys had not started big growth spurt yet at 12. A handful- yes! But definitely not the majority. Not at age 12. By 13-14 the majority of boys have. And then of course some boys will be later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Insecure parents with short kids are annoying. Especially sports parents with anxiety. I have a 13 year old who is 5’11. I’ve never bragged about him being tall. Why? Because it is basically irrelevant to me. In fact, he did hit puberty early and I don’t expect him to get much taller. I’m so sick of these parents suggesting that my kid excels in his sport because he is tall. Um. Wrong. My kid has always excelled in his sport - even prior to his growth spurt. If anything, growing so tall so fast made it harder for his body to adjust. I can’t tell you how many parents on his team push their anxiety onto me with their suggestions that my kid somehow has an unfair advantage. I then have to comfort them about my kids early growth spurt, etc. It’s exhausting. Just chill the f out about your kids height. It will be what it will be.

Your kid is gonna top out at 13 though

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I get where you are coming from. I posted a hand wringing thread about my tiny late blooming son and sports at some point, though he was younger than yours. There have been other threads about this too.

Because that is what you are really getting at, right? Sports? Most sports will not be possible to play at the high school level for very late blooming boys. It isn’t even about height, but about physical maturity. I’m sorry, but it is true. And your DS is even later blooming than mine was. I will tell you from experience that you just need to accept this in your mind and move on. Your DS will figure things out on his own- just be encouraging of him in whatever he wants to do.

My DS (now a senior and 6’1”) dropped team sports freshman year and found other things to do. At that time he was 5’5” maybe 110lbs? and it was clearly going to be quite awhile before he “caught up” physically. He decided to move on and focus on other interests. Anyway- as a Senior, he is a great student, plays golf and tennis recreationally, goes to the gym three times/wk, has a part time job, does volunteer work, had friends and is happy. Sports are not everything. And it isn’t other people’s fault that your kid, and mine, got a bum deal in the puberty lottery. It is just life, and it really does not matter in the long run.

OP again, actually no, he’s not particularly into sports (never has been) so that’s not the issue. It’s just me with a rant about the weird bragging and a comment on the meanness that seems to sometimes accompany the dominant tall kids which the parents are seemingly unaware of.

You haven’t given any examples of meanness. You started off this bizarre thread with a rant about some random mom posting on her own (presumably) social media account that her Johnny is tall.

The only mean-spirited comments in your original post came from you.

I’m curious about this too. OP what are the tall kids saying/doing to your kid? IME with my late blooming kid- it was more that he was ignored by a lot of the mature boys than anything else. They were just on different wavelengths and had different interests. He wasn’t picked on or bullied.

Not OP - I’ll give a non sports related answer. My son is a late bloomer he’s 14 and 5’3”. We did cotillion when he was 12. The boys had to ask the girls to dance. So many of the girls were taller than him, and some by a lot at nearly 6 feet tall. 12 is that awkard age where the girls have hit puberty and the boys are just starting. Several of the girls laughed at him and told him no because he was too short. This was for like a 90 second song. He wasn’t aking them to marry him. A little kindness would have gone a long way.

I wonder how many “ugly” girls your son asked to dance? Thinks are awkward and unfair all over.

Oh sure. That has to be it . The girls were rude, period. Examples were asked for and given.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Isn't "look how big you're getting!" like a pretty common thing to say to babies/children? Chill tf out, you have a lot of years left and they're going to be rough if you get heated over stupid stuff.

OP here. What makes you think I’m heated?

NP. Your entire OP. It’s ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I get where you are coming from. I posted a hand wringing thread about my tiny late blooming son and sports at some point, though he was younger than yours. There have been other threads about this too.

Because that is what you are really getting at, right? Sports? Most sports will not be possible to play at the high school level for very late blooming boys. It isn’t even about height, but about physical maturity. I’m sorry, but it is true. And your DS is even later blooming than mine was. I will tell you from experience that you just need to accept this in your mind and move on. Your DS will figure things out on his own- just be encouraging of him in whatever he wants to do.

My DS (now a senior and 6’1”) dropped team sports freshman year and found other things to do. At that time he was 5’5” maybe 110lbs? and it was clearly going to be quite awhile before he “caught up” physically. He decided to move on and focus on other interests. Anyway- as a Senior, he is a great student, plays golf and tennis recreationally, goes to the gym three times/wk, has a part time job, does volunteer work, had friends and is happy. Sports are not everything. And it isn’t other people’s fault that your kid, and mine, got a bum deal in the puberty lottery. It is just life, and it really does not matter in the long run.

OP again, actually no, he’s not particularly into sports (never has been) so that’s not the issue. It’s just me with a rant about the weird bragging and a comment on the meanness that seems to sometimes accompany the dominant tall kids which the parents are seemingly unaware of.

You haven’t given any examples of meanness. You started off this bizarre thread with a rant about some random mom posting on her own (presumably) social media account that her Johnny is tall.

The only mean-spirited comments in your original post came from you.

+1

The only mean person I see here is OP

[Anonymous]

OP- just let it play out. My boys were late growers. Several of the 5’7”-5’8” 6th-7th graders were still that height Senior year of HS. Then, several 5’4” 9th graders were 6 feet Senior year, and a few like mine grabbed two more inches in college.

The exceptions are the friends who had BOTH parents way above average in height-of course their daughters were 5’11-6 feet plus and sons 6’3-6’10”.

I just wished for average to make things easier for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m not bragging about his feet so much as looking for sympathy. Size 14 shoes are hard to find in stores and expensive AF.

And as a PP said, he’s just really freaking tall. It’s an objective fact. And your son may be kinder or smarter than him, but he’s definitely not going to be taller than him.

You’re the one making a big deal out of it.

Truth. Thankfully we have the internet. My son also wears size 14 shoes and they are especially hard to find when they want a certain brand. I just ordered a specific pair of slides that ran small in 15s.

I’m not bragging but happy if I talk about it. He was 5’2 for most of middle school and self conscious.

If he was 5’2” in middle school he was right in the middle of the pack and had nothing to be self conscious about.

My son was 5’3” at 13 and Tanner 2 for puberty. He ended up being 6’. He was always in the 50 - 75%tile. Always rolling along in the middle. Perfect place to be in my opinion.

Come on, you say that as a rational adult. As a parent you understand kids are always self conscious. When he was the average middle school kid he only saw the tall kids. Now that he’s the tall kid, he isn’t noticing that, but only hearing about the ones bragging about having 4.5 and 1600 SAT scores and D1 recruits as college applications approach. He doesn’t have anything like that academically or athletically. Kids will always be self conscious about something.

My 12 year old daughter is an average 5’5”, no period yet and is right in the middle of the pack. There are a handful of tall boys compared to the vast majority of boys who haven’t grown yet. Most of the boys are still short. To look at the tiny minority of boys who have sprouted early and feel self conscious doesn’t even make sense. What you describe is envy.

You just introduced 12 year olds. This thread is about older kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I get where you are coming from. I posted a hand wringing thread about my tiny late blooming son and sports at some point, though he was younger than yours. There have been other threads about this too.

Because that is what you are really getting at, right? Sports? Most sports will not be possible to play at the high school level for very late blooming boys. It isn’t even about height, but about physical maturity. I’m sorry, but it is true. And your DS is even later blooming than mine was. I will tell you from experience that you just need to accept this in your mind and move on. Your DS will figure things out on his own- just be encouraging of him in whatever he wants to do.

My DS (now a senior and 6’1”) dropped team sports freshman year and found other things to do. At that time he was 5’5” maybe 110lbs? and it was clearly going to be quite awhile before he “caught up” physically. He decided to move on and focus on other interests. Anyway- as a Senior, he is a great student, plays golf and tennis recreationally, goes to the gym three times/wk, has a part time job, does volunteer work, had friends and is happy. Sports are not everything. And it isn’t other people’s fault that your kid, and mine, got a bum deal in the puberty lottery. It is just life, and it really does not matter in the long run.

OP again, actually no, he’s not particularly into sports (never has been) so that’s not the issue. It’s just me with a rant about the weird bragging and a comment on the meanness that seems to sometimes accompany the dominant tall kids which the parents are seemingly unaware of.

You haven’t given any examples of meanness. You started off this bizarre thread with a rant about some random mom posting on her own (presumably) social media account that her Johnny is tall.

The only mean-spirited comments in your original post came from you.

+1

The only mean person I see here is OP

I don’t see anything mean from any of the parents of short kids in this thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP- just let it play out. My boys were late growers. Several of the 5’7”-5’8” 6th-7th graders were still that height Senior year of HS. Then, several 5’4” 9th graders were 6 feet Senior year, and a few like mine grabbed two more inches in college.

The exceptions are the friends who had BOTH parents way above average in height-of course their daughters were 5’11-6 feet plus and sons 6’3-6’10”.

I just wished for average to make things easier for them.

I think that was the point being made here.

[Anonymous]

This is more about over sharing on social media than anything. Some parents do that- about everything it seems.

Of course a big growth spurt might come up in conversation when talking about your kids. I don’t post on SM but just last week sent a “now and then” photo of my very late bloomer DS on my extended family group chat- my DS went from looking like a 12yo last year at this time to looking like a 16yo (his age) this year. It is super dramatic. And he is not tall (just average).

Or when parents are asked how their kids are doing…it can come up. “Oh Larla just got her learner’s permit, Larlo is growing like a weed & eating us out of house and home” blah blah blah. It’s no different from small talk about a toddler learning to walk or a kid starting Kindergarten or getting braces or whatever. No one is bragging. Most kids do all of these things (including growing and becoming teens). It is routine small talk and really no one cares about any of it other than close family or friends

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP- just let it play out. My boys were late growers. Several of the 5’7”-5’8” 6th-7th graders were still that height Senior year of HS. Then, several 5’4” 9th graders were 6 feet Senior year, and a few like mine grabbed two more inches in college.

The exceptions are the friends who had BOTH parents way above average in height-of course their daughters were 5’11-6 feet plus and sons 6’3-6’10”.

I just wished for average to make things easier for them.

+1

This is what I have seen as well, in two cohorts of teen boys.

It will always be more difficult for late blooming boys and early maturing girls- as a general rule. Maturing at an average time tends to be the ideal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Insecure parents with short kids are annoying. Especially sports parents with anxiety. I have a 13 year old who is 5’11. I’ve never bragged about him being tall. Why? Because it is basically irrelevant to me. In fact, he did hit puberty early and I don’t expect him to get much taller. I’m so sick of these parents suggesting that my kid excels in his sport because he is tall. Um. Wrong. My kid has always excelled in his sport - even prior to his growth spurt. If anything, growing so tall so fast made it harder for his body to adjust. I can’t tell you how many parents on his team push their anxiety onto me with their suggestions that my kid somehow has an unfair advantage. I then have to comfort them about my kids early growth spurt, etc. It’s exhausting. Just chill the f out about your kids height. It will be what it will be.

It’s irrelevant because you have zero experience with a late blooming boy. You have no idea what you’re talking about or what other people’s experiences are. An early blooming 13 yr old boy has everything sports related handed to him on a platter. The other kids have to work 2x as hard to get in the game and have the coach notice him. The coaches seem to only see the buoys.

I’m the pp you are talking to. Nonsense. The best kids short or tall get the playing time. My kid happens to be tall for his age. So what? He gets playing time because he is good. Many of the players also getting the most playing time are not tall. They get playing time because they are good. Grow up and stop making excuses.