Preschool vs Daycare Wars

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP. My kids are older teens now and I will say this: stay far, far away from people who feel strongly about this topic. They invariably turn out to be the parents you don’t want your kids around. It’s a handy guide, sort of like how you also want to avoid people with really strong feelings on redshirting.

I agree. The gatekeepers of this little Mommy War are the parents who are judgmental and difficult to deal with. They probably also have many other silly arbitrary rules about what their child can and can't do at your house or what your child can and can't do at their house. Steer clear of them because they are often too much work to be friendly with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. My kids are older teens now and I will say this: stay far, far away from people who feel strongly about this topic. They invariably turn out to be the parents you don’t want your kids around. It’s a handy guide, sort of like how you also want to avoid people with really strong feelings on redshirting.

I agree. The gatekeepers of this little Mommy War are the parents who are judgmental and difficult to deal with. They probably also have many other silly arbitrary rules about what their child can and can't do at your house or what your child can and can't do at their house. Steer clear of them because they are often too much work to be friendly with.

+1

They are also invariably the parents who gossip maliciously about other kids. Generally speaking, these are not safe or good people to have your kids around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s the difference between a group of daycare kids who play on the playground for several hours a day being watched by people who make $15-25/hr and a group of nannies who meet at the same neighborhood park every day? The difference to the kids is Zilch!

What’s the difference between a nanny share with 3 kids that doesn’t meet at my house and an in-home daycare with 3 kids and 1 caregiver? The difference my kid is Zilch.

The only difference I can see is that to some people the middle aged white woman at the church preschool who has been teaching for 20 years is somehow superior to the 24 yr old Black woman who has a community college certificate in early education and is working at Bright Horizons until she earns enough money to get a 4 yr degree to teach elementary school. Having participated in a variety of childcare scenarios, the main difference I see in preschool teachers vs daycare worker, nanny, or au pair is not their qualifications and educational background. It’s their age and ethnicity. Preschool teachers tend to be older and whiter because that is who can afford to work part time hours. Somehow looking like the stereotypical teacher from a picture book commands more respect.

I think anyone wringing their hands about “group learning is not evidence based before 3” and “children do best one on one” and “PRE school is DIFFERENT!” are actually saying -
1. I can afford to not work / work part time / pay a nanny.
2. I place a premium on having my children cared for by white native English speakers.
3. I want my children to be socialized with other children whose parents share the same privileges and priorities.
4. The fact that children thrive in a wide variety of care scenarios is a threat to my choice for my family.
5. If another kid is securely attached, well socialized, and well prepared for school despite their parent’s inferior choice of childcare, then what was my sacrifice even for?

That’s great that you want to turn this into a race issue but your personal observations do not align with the evidence based science or reality. You really think supporting the $3 million dollar salary of the white male CEO of the publicly traded lllc Bright Horizons is somehow a progressive action? You’ve been conned. They literally pay less than almost any other center and are known for high turnover and worker exploitation.

And, yes, ratios and hours spent in group care matter.

X100. You think the Bright Horizons worker isn’t stressed about making ends meet while taking care of your child + 8 other kids for 12 hours a day in “school” aka a publicly traded company (how many church preschools are publicly traded?).

Oh and sorry to burst your bubble but the vast majority of nannies are also people of color. The vast majority of people working in early childhood education and caretaking are people of color. Except my nanny makes $70,000/year and the people working at your kid’s daycare are getting $15/hour (if they work the same hours as my nanny that’s equivalent to $39,000/year…but yes, please believe you’re progressive and not exploiting anyone).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s the difference between a group of daycare kids who play on the playground for several hours a day being watched by people who make $15-25/hr and a group of nannies who meet at the same neighborhood park every day? The difference to the kids is Zilch!

What’s the difference between a nanny share with 3 kids that doesn’t meet at my house and an in-home daycare with 3 kids and 1 caregiver? The difference my kid is Zilch.

The only difference I can see is that to some people the middle aged white woman at the church preschool who has been teaching for 20 years is somehow superior to the 24 yr old Black woman who has a community college certificate in early education and is working at Bright Horizons until she earns enough money to get a 4 yr degree to teach elementary school. Having participated in a variety of childcare scenarios, the main difference I see in preschool teachers vs daycare worker, nanny, or au pair is not their qualifications and educational background. It’s their age and ethnicity. Preschool teachers tend to be older and whiter because that is who can afford to work part time hours. Somehow looking like the stereotypical teacher from a picture book commands more respect.

I think anyone wringing their hands about “group learning is not evidence based before 3” and “children do best one on one” and “PRE school is DIFFERENT!” are actually saying -
1. I can afford to not work / work part time / pay a nanny.
2. I place a premium on having my children cared for by white native English speakers.
3. I want my children to be socialized with other children whose parents share the same privileges and priorities.
4. The fact that children thrive in a wide variety of care scenarios is a threat to my choice for my family.
5. If another kid is securely attached, well socialized, and well prepared for school despite their parent’s inferior choice of childcare, then what was my sacrifice even for?

That’s great that you want to turn this into a race issue but your personal observations do not align with the evidence based science or reality. You really think supporting the $3 million dollar salary of the white male CEO of the publicly traded lllc Bright Horizons is somehow a progressive action? You’ve been conned. They literally pay less than almost any other center and are known for high turnover and worker exploitation.

And, yes, ratios and hours spent in group care matter.

X100. You think the Bright Horizons worker isn’t stressed about making ends meet while taking care of your child + 8 other kids for 12 hours a day in “school” aka a publicly traded company (how many church preschools are publicly traded?).

Oh and sorry to burst your bubble but the vast majority of nannies are also people of color. The vast majority of people working in early childhood education and caretaking are people of color. Except my nanny makes $70,000/year and the people working at your kid’s daycare are getting $15/hour (if they work the same hours as my nanny that’s equivalent to $39,000/year…but yes, please believe you’re progressive and not exploiting anyone).

We've visited a lot of preschools and a lot of daycares in the same area and it is just as PP described. The daycare teachers and administrators are more likely to be younger women of color and the preschool teachers are more likely to be White. Most of us with kids in daycare are well aware that daycare teachers don't get paid enough. The fact is that the economics of running a daycare are extremely difficult. In order to get to a good wage (e.g. $70k a year) they'd need to make it completely unaffordable for most families, which is why they can't do it. You are right that there are a lot of issues with publicly traded child care companies (they are definitely overpriced, though some provide perfectly fine care), but I'm not sure what that has to do with the fact that you can afford a $70k nanny. Congratulations?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s the difference between a group of daycare kids who play on the playground for several hours a day being watched by people who make $15-25/hr and a group of nannies who meet at the same neighborhood park every day? The difference to the kids is Zilch!

What’s the difference between a nanny share with 3 kids that doesn’t meet at my house and an in-home daycare with 3 kids and 1 caregiver? The difference my kid is Zilch.

The only difference I can see is that to some people the middle aged white woman at the church preschool who has been teaching for 20 years is somehow superior to the 24 yr old Black woman who has a community college certificate in early education and is working at Bright Horizons until she earns enough money to get a 4 yr degree to teach elementary school. Having participated in a variety of childcare scenarios, the main difference I see in preschool teachers vs daycare worker, nanny, or au pair is not their qualifications and educational background. It’s their age and ethnicity. Preschool teachers tend to be older and whiter because that is who can afford to work part time hours. Somehow looking like the stereotypical teacher from a picture book commands more respect.

I think anyone wringing their hands about “group learning is not evidence based before 3” and “children do best one on one” and “PRE school is DIFFERENT!” are actually saying -
1. I can afford to not work / work part time / pay a nanny.
2. I place a premium on having my children cared for by white native English speakers.
3. I want my children to be socialized with other children whose parents share the same privileges and priorities.
4. The fact that children thrive in a wide variety of care scenarios is a threat to my choice for my family.
5. If another kid is securely attached, well socialized, and well prepared for school despite their parent’s inferior choice of childcare, then what was my sacrifice even for?

That’s great that you want to turn this into a race issue but your personal observations do not align with the evidence based science or reality. You really think supporting the $3 million dollar salary of the white male CEO of the publicly traded lllc Bright Horizons is somehow a progressive action? You’ve been conned. They literally pay less than almost any other center and are known for high turnover and worker exploitation.

And, yes, ratios and hours spent in group care matter.

X100. You think the Bright Horizons worker isn’t stressed about making ends meet while taking care of your child + 8 other kids for 12 hours a day in “school” aka a publicly traded company (how many church preschools are publicly traded?).

Oh and sorry to burst your bubble but the vast majority of nannies are also people of color. The vast majority of people working in early childhood education and caretaking are people of color. Except my nanny makes $70,000/year and the people working at your kid’s daycare are getting $15/hour (if they work the same hours as my nanny that’s equivalent to $39,000/year…but yes, please believe you’re progressive and not exploiting anyone).

We've visited a lot of preschools and a lot of daycares in the same area and it is just as PP described. The daycare teachers and administrators are more likely to be younger women of color and the preschool teachers are more likely to be White. Most of us with kids in daycare are well aware that daycare teachers don't get paid enough. The fact is that the economics of running a daycare are extremely difficult. In order to get to a good wage (e.g. $70k a year) they'd need to make it completely unaffordable for most families, which is why they can't do it. You are right that there are a lot of issues with publicly traded child care companies (they are definitely overpriced, though some provide perfectly fine care), but I'm not sure what that has to do with the fact that you can afford a $70k nanny. Congratulations?

Or she does a nanny share for 35K or an in-home for even less. Bright horizons is $20,000 a year for an infant spot.
Congratulations you paid $20 million dollars to their investors last year?

[Anonymous]

None of you Bright Horizons-obsessed posters have yet answered the question about why you care what other people call the place their child spends their day. No one started a(nother) thread to hear from the same posters who continue to say childcare workers are paid $15.00.

So please, again, why do you care what people call it? Not why don’t you like it (because, frankly, I don’t care and it’s tedious to hear this again) but why do you personally care if Grayson calls Congressional School a school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s the difference between a group of daycare kids who play on the playground for several hours a day being watched by people who make $15-25/hr and a group of nannies who meet at the same neighborhood park every day? The difference to the kids is Zilch!

What’s the difference between a nanny share with 3 kids that doesn’t meet at my house and an in-home daycare with 3 kids and 1 caregiver? The difference my kid is Zilch.

The only difference I can see is that to some people the middle aged white woman at the church preschool who has been teaching for 20 years is somehow superior to the 24 yr old Black woman who has a community college certificate in early education and is working at Bright Horizons until she earns enough money to get a 4 yr degree to teach elementary school. Having participated in a variety of childcare scenarios, the main difference I see in preschool teachers vs daycare worker, nanny, or au pair is not their qualifications and educational background. It’s their age and ethnicity. Preschool teachers tend to be older and whiter because that is who can afford to work part time hours. Somehow looking like the stereotypical teacher from a picture book commands more respect.

I think anyone wringing their hands about “group learning is not evidence based before 3” and “children do best one on one” and “PRE school is DIFFERENT!” are actually saying -
1. I can afford to not work / work part time / pay a nanny.
2. I place a premium on having my children cared for by white native English speakers.
3. I want my children to be socialized with other children whose parents share the same privileges and priorities.
4. The fact that children thrive in a wide variety of care scenarios is a threat to my choice for my family.
5. If another kid is securely attached, well socialized, and well prepared for school despite their parent’s inferior choice of childcare, then what was my sacrifice even for?

That’s great that you want to turn this into a race issue but your personal observations do not align with the evidence based science or reality. You really think supporting the $3 million dollar salary of the white male CEO of the publicly traded lllc Bright Horizons is somehow a progressive action? You’ve been conned. They literally pay less than almost any other center and are known for high turnover and worker exploitation.

And, yes, ratios and hours spent in group care matter.

X100. You think the Bright Horizons worker isn’t stressed about making ends meet while taking care of your child + 8 other kids for 12 hours a day in “school” aka a publicly traded company (how many church preschools are publicly traded?).

Oh and sorry to burst your bubble but the vast majority of nannies are also people of color. The vast majority of people working in early childhood education and caretaking are people of color. Except my nanny makes $70,000/year and the people working at your kid’s daycare are getting $15/hour (if they work the same hours as my nanny that’s equivalent to $39,000/year…but yes, please believe you’re progressive and not exploiting anyone).

We've visited a lot of preschools and a lot of daycares in the same area and it is just as PP described. The daycare teachers and administrators are more likely to be younger women of color and the preschool teachers are more likely to be White. Most of us with kids in daycare are well aware that daycare teachers don't get paid enough. The fact is that the economics of running a daycare are extremely difficult. In order to get to a good wage (e.g. $70k a year) they'd need to make it completely unaffordable for most families, which is why they can't do it. You are right that there are a lot of issues with publicly traded child care companies (they are definitely overpriced, though some provide perfectly fine care), but I'm not sure what that has to do with the fact that you can afford a $70k nanny. Congratulations?

Or she does a nanny share for 35K or an in-home for even less. Bright horizons is $20,000 a year for an infant spot.
Congratulations you paid $20 million dollars to their investors last year?

I don't use Bright Horizons.

[Anonymous]

Btw nanny shares are unlicensed daycares, no thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Btw nanny shares are unlicensed daycares, no thanks.

Yup. And in home daycares sketch me out. Sure, the people that work there on paper are licensed, but what about their creepy male relative that lives there? I’m not letting my two daughters near anyone that hasn’t been CORI checked (might be a Massachusetts thing although I’m sure something similar exists in each state).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Btw nanny shares are unlicensed daycares, no thanks.

Yup. And in home daycares sketch me out. Sure, the people that work there on paper are licensed, but what about their creepy male relative that lives there? I’m not letting my two daughters near anyone that hasn’t been CORI checked (might be a Massachusetts thing although I’m sure something similar exists in each state).

I’m the PP who pays my nanny $70K a year and she’s our nanny - it’s actually not the same as an unlicensed daycare center but I guess since you think daycare and preschool are the same thing you hear “nanny” and instead of assuming a caregiving for children in a family you bizarrely hear “unlicensed daycare center with sketchy male relative hanging around.” And thanks for congratulating me. I work very hard as does my nanny and it’s important to be to provide fair compensation to her and the teachers at my children’s preschool. A distinction that I am making between daycare and the set up that I pay for (nanny + preschool) - for the poster who asked what the point of this comment was.

[Anonymous]

With my first child I truly had no idea the word ‘daycare’ had a negative connotation and was so confused when people would suggest putting my 9mo old in preschool.

I view daycare as a full time childcare option available for babies and older and preschool as a very part time enrichment activity for a specific age group. The big distinction is that preschool isn’t used as childcare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Btw nanny shares are unlicensed daycares, no thanks.

Yup. And in home daycares sketch me out. Sure, the people that work there on paper are licensed, but what about their creepy male relative that lives there? I’m not letting my two daughters near anyone that hasn’t been CORI checked (might be a Massachusetts thing although I’m sure something similar exists in each state).

I’m the PP who pays my nanny $70K a year and she’s our nanny - it’s actually not the same as an unlicensed daycare center but I guess since you think daycare and preschool are the same thing you hear “nanny” and instead of assuming a caregiving for children in a family you bizarrely hear “unlicensed daycare center with sketchy male relative hanging around.” And thanks for congratulating me. I work very hard as does my nanny and it’s important to be to provide fair compensation to her and the teachers at my children’s preschool. A distinction that I am making between daycare and the set up that I pay for (nanny + preschool) - for the poster who asked what the point of this comment was.

You are going to have a rough go of it in the teen years.

[Anonymous]

People say preschool or school because they think daycare sounds like something poor people use.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Btw nanny shares are unlicensed daycares, no thanks.

Yup. And in home daycares sketch me out. Sure, the people that work there on paper are licensed, but what about their creepy male relative that lives there? I’m not letting my two daughters near anyone that hasn’t been CORI checked (might be a Massachusetts thing although I’m sure something similar exists in each state).

I’m the PP who pays my nanny $70K a year and she’s our nanny - it’s actually not the same as an unlicensed daycare center but I guess since you think daycare and preschool are the same thing you hear “nanny” and instead of assuming a caregiving for children in a family you bizarrely hear “unlicensed daycare center with sketchy male relative hanging around.” And thanks for congratulating me. I work very hard as does my nanny and it’s important to be to provide fair compensation to her and the teachers at my children’s preschool. A distinction that I am making between daycare and the set up that I pay for (nanny + preschool) - for the poster who asked what the point of this comment was.

With Pay Equity in DC, this year teachers in child care centers will be making over 70,000 per year. Maybe we should call them nannies now?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People say preschool or school because they think daycare sounds like something poor people use.

It’s not daycare. Larlo (6m) attends Xavier’s Steam Stem Academy of Excellence. Its not daycare, it’s an Academy. Obviously.