Preschool vs Daycare Wars

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would never correct someone in real life but I do always have the fleeting thought that it’s a bit pathetic when parents of daycare-age kids call it “school.” Makes me think they are in denial about sending kids to daycare, which I think is ridiculous because I fully support women working. It’s just the dishonesty that bothers me.

Well for the child there is "school". They have circle time, learn letter recognition and counting skills, and learn to interact in a school setting and follow a routine. I'm not saying it's the same as a half day preschool. But to say it's not school at all is a little dumb and petty, honestly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You know there are working parents who enroll their kids in preschool, right?

They would call that a daycare. If you need it for childcare- it's daycare. If you're just sending your kids to it so that they get socialized and learn things- it's preschool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would never correct someone in real life but I do always have the fleeting thought that it’s a bit pathetic when parents of daycare-age kids call it “school.” Makes me think they are in denial about sending kids to daycare, which I think is ridiculous because I fully support women working. It’s just the dishonesty that bothers me.

I think you need to look into why this bothers you. They aren't being dishonest. You think they don't realize that it's daycare too? It's easier to say "school" and "teachers". I can't imagine introciduing my kids to their new classroom and saying "here's your new daycare worker- Miss Anna". They're still teachers.

[Anonymous]

Let's also remember that daycare teachers are disproportionately BIPOC women. Saying they are "daycare workers" when they are lesson planning, teaching pencil grasp, teaching kids to resolve conflicts and follow rules, running circle time, etc, is a little insulting, don't you think? It's like sorry, you're not good enough, even though you are doing the same job we can't give you the same respect as a "preschool" teacher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So there is a big difference, op, and I’m not sure why you would want to keep misnaming it. Pre school isn’t really set up covering childcare during working hours at all. Pre school (half days) generally starts out at 2 days a week for 2 year olds, 3 days a week for 3 yo, etc and is focused on early socialization and skills. If you use pre school you still need child care for most of the day. It generally requires potty trained kids and doesn’t stat before 3. It’s more like supplemental places like my gym, music classes, mothers morning out, or coop pre schools.

Daycare is group childcare that is obviously structured around dual working parent hours. I have done both. There’s some evidence that the less hours/younger age for group care is healthier for kids in the long but obviously is a big financial sacrifice for any family to sah or get a nanny for the bulk of care through those years and what’s best for each family is different. But I think it’s confusing to say you are using pre school when you are doing daycare, because it does imply you are either not working or have a nanny/family caring for your child most of the time. So yes I would clarify that with you if we met on the playground and started talking about childcare.

I’m a working mom and have also used a daycare center and a preschool. The preschool was still full day, but you had to pay extra for hours from 4-6 pm and there was an official admission timeline with start date to run with a school calendar vs rolling admission/waitlist. It was then optional to enroll in the summer program. So I do think the preschool was a bit more geared to parents who are part time/SAH/flex hours. But I knew plenty of full time dual income families like ours there who sent kids there.

So honestly, I don’t think it was a huge difference since I could get my full workday covered at both daycare and preschool. We only switched because we moved, otherwise we would have stayed at our daycare center which had a pre-K program with full curriculum. Also our daycare had optional add on programs you could pay for like dance, soccer, etc. So overall I found the differences pretty minor.

The only people who get worked up over this are the ones who think they’re too good for daycare and want to somehow distinguish their childcare. (FWIW, I’ve also had a nanny and cut hours to part time for a while, so I’ve basically done it all at this point and I think some people get their identities way to wrapped up in this type of thing).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So there is a big difference, op, and I’m not sure why you would want to keep misnaming it. Pre school isn’t really set up covering childcare during working hours at all. Pre school (half days) generally starts out at 2 days a week for 2 year olds, 3 days a week for 3 yo, etc and is focused on early socialization and skills. If you use pre school you still need child care for most of the day. It generally requires potty trained kids and doesn’t stat before 3. It’s more like supplemental places like my gym, music classes, mothers morning out, or coop pre schools.

Daycare is group childcare that is obviously structured around dual working parent hours. I have done both. There’s some evidence that the less hours/younger age for group care is healthier for kids in the long but obviously is a big financial sacrifice for any family to sah or get a nanny for the bulk of care through those years and what’s best for each family is different. But I think it’s confusing to say you are using pre school when you are doing daycare, because it does imply you are either not working or have a nanny/family caring for your child most of the time. So yes I would clarify that with you if we met on the playground and started talking about childcare.

On the other hand, older friends and relatives often ask if my kid is in preschool, and if I have to say "no, daycare," I have to explain the whole thing. They don't know or care about the difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never correct someone in real life but I do always have the fleeting thought that it’s a bit pathetic when parents of daycare-age kids call it “school.” Makes me think they are in denial about sending kids to daycare, which I think is ridiculous because I fully support women working. It’s just the dishonesty that bothers me.

Well for the child there is "school". They have circle time, learn letter recognition and counting skills, and learn to interact in a school setting and follow a routine. I'm not saying it's the same as a half day preschool. But to say it's not school at all is a little dumb and petty, honestly.

DP. I’ll add too that a lot of kids have older siblings who are school age so the little ones get excited to get to go to “school” too.

[Anonymous]

I’m in the south and can confirm “daycare” is a bad word around here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So there is a big difference, op, and I’m not sure why you would want to keep misnaming it. Pre school isn’t really set up covering childcare during working hours at all. Pre school (half days) generally starts out at 2 days a week for 2 year olds, 3 days a week for 3 yo, etc and is focused on early socialization and skills. If you use pre school you still need child care for most of the day. It generally requires potty trained kids and doesn’t stat before 3. It’s more like supplemental places like my gym, music classes, mothers morning out, or coop pre schools.

Daycare is group childcare that is obviously structured around dual working parent hours. I have done both. There’s some evidence that the less hours/younger age for group care is healthier for kids in the long but obviously is a big financial sacrifice for any family to sah or get a nanny for the bulk of care through those years and what’s best for each family is different. But I think it’s confusing to say you are using pre school when you are doing daycare, because it does imply you are either not working or have a nanny/family caring for your child most of the time. So yes I would clarify that with you if we met on the playground and started talking about childcare.

I don’t know why you care so much about the difference between the two. I see the points you’re making, but why does it matter? Our KinderCare does daycare for the little ones and then they move to an accredited preschool classroom. I am sure their PK is on par with other PK’s that are truly PK. so why even get this worked up by it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m in the south and can confirm “daycare” is a bad word around here.

Why is that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never correct someone in real life but I do always have the fleeting thought that it’s a bit pathetic when parents of daycare-age kids call it “school.” Makes me think they are in denial about sending kids to daycare, which I think is ridiculous because I fully support women working. It’s just the dishonesty that bothers me.

My question is what makes one a daycare and one a preschool if they are both teaching? My friend sends her kid to a daycare but they are taught the same things kids in preschool are taught. So its a combo preschool and daycare (open year round and until 6pm). So yes, its a daycare. But they also do a ton of teaching.

Age. That’s it. I don’t know or cares about the differences between daycares and preschools for kids 3+. But younger than 3, it’s daycare.

[Anonymous]

So I call my daughters preschool a preschool primarily because it’s literally in the name.

I also think calling an adult with a degree in early childhood development and more than ten years of experience teaching young children a “daycare worker” rather than a teacher— especially when their colleagues and superiors call them a teacher— would be astonishingly disrespectful. This is in fact something I’ve only seen on DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So there is a big difference, op, and I’m not sure why you would want to keep misnaming it. Pre school isn’t really set up covering childcare during working hours at all. Pre school (half days) generally starts out at 2 days a week for 2 year olds, 3 days a week for 3 yo, etc and is focused on early socialization and skills. If you use pre school you still need child care for most of the day. It generally requires potty trained kids and doesn’t stat before 3. It’s more like supplemental places like my gym, music classes, mothers morning out, or coop pre schools.

Daycare is group childcare that is obviously structured around dual working parent hours. I have done both. There’s some evidence that the less hours/younger age for group care is healthier for kids in the long but obviously is a big financial sacrifice for any family to sah or get a nanny for the bulk of care through those years and what’s best for each family is different. But I think it’s confusing to say you are using pre school when you are doing daycare, because it does imply you are either not working or have a nanny/family caring for your child most of the time. So yes I would clarify that with you if we met on the playground and started talking about childcare.

I’m so curious about this. First of all, why would you need/want to clarify this? And second of all, how exactly would you word your questioning. I’m picturing;

Larla: Little Larlita just started preschool at Little Tots, she loves her teachers there.

PP: Oh what hours does she go? Does your nanny watch her the rest of the day?

Oh full day. So you mean daycare right? And Larlita is watched by daycare workers then, not a teacher.

[Anonymous]

We did daycare from 18 mos-3.5 then switched our schedules, got a PT sitter and switched to a pre-k program for the year before K. I do think there is a difference but I’m not knocking daycare, I think people try to send bougie or act like there 2 year old is a child prodigy who goes to preschool, it’s annoying. Your 2yo in diapers that still naps is not in preschool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We did daycare from 18 mos-3.5 then switched our schedules, got a PT sitter and switched to a pre-k program for the year before K. I do think there is a difference but I’m not knocking daycare, I think people try to send bougie or act like there 2 year old is a child prodigy who goes to preschool, it’s annoying. Your 2yo in diapers that still naps is not in preschool.

So my potty trained 2 y/o and my friends napping 4 y/o who attend the same accredited program— one is in preschool and one is in daycare? This is why this distinction is silly and I think only a DCUM mommy war difference.