Finances with big mortgage

[Anonymous]

Sounds like the grandparents wanted you to have a second kid and paying for the nanny is how they make sure it happens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here -

I agree we need to cut down the two shopping expenditures. I’m not the only one with a credit card so it’s not as simple.

The reason I have 1k for furniture is that our house is slowly being furnished. We didn’t move in with much so we are now buying outdoor furniture (porch, patio, deck) and indoor furniture. There’s seven bedrooms, an office, basement theater, etc that look bare without being somewhat furnished. We’re trying to find good deals rather than splurge all at once. We also inherited a large outdoor jacuzzi that needs to be maintained.

The grandparents rather pay for help and pitch in here and there rather than quit their jobs and become full time babysitters. They also refuse to retire.

Sure it would be nice to have an Instagram
Worthy house now, but why do you need everything furnished so quickly? We did it slowly and often it meant hand me downs, Facebook marketplace and paper blinds for a few years while we saved. Buying a crib and car seat and childcare was way more important.

I don’t see how someone is furnishing a home for $12k. 12k IS Facebook marketplace and paper blinds for a 7 bedroom house.

Presumably they brought some furniture with them, have been buying furniture since they bought the place, etc. My point is they need to stop buying rugs and furniture and out that money towards the new kid if that is what they are so stressed about, as they indicated in their first post. They clearly don’t want to sell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:7k may be a third of their take home but taking out such a large mortgage is foolish. It means you are slave to your job and dependent on a high income to maintain your lifestyle. We make the same income and our mortgage is 3500. But we don't have mommy and daddy to bail us out.

For real. This is why we’ve never taken out a big mortgage. We’ve used our big income to drive out mortgage down. We could take career risks due to easily being able to live and save on one income when needed.

It’s a really nice feeling sitting here at age 45 getting a bit sick of working. I’m not trapped in a guilded cage. As a matter of fact my employer is trying to force be back into the office 3xs a week and I’m dug in refusing more than 1 day. I’m thinking they are welcome to fire me. We are in a Mexican stand off and I’m not backing down. Could never do this if I needed this job to pay my bills.

I understand this approach but not sure it’s best. The large mortgage can be a ball and chain, but it’s in OP’s best interest to keep working in a high paying job.

Back in the day we bought a starter home we could afford one one salary. Except both spouses continued working and earnings increased. We made less equity than if we’d bought at the top of our budget. Then we had to spend thousands selling the starter home and buying another house. We thought we were being smart financially but really it limited us.

OP is likely going to continue working and so will his or her spouse. They even have grandparents to pay for the nanny. They probably locked in a low rate and we’ll likely have confined inflation for quite some time.

OP need to buckle down the next few years and keep at it.

Well I actually have 10k in mortgages, but instead of wasting it on my primary home and an idiotic 7 bedrooms we have it spread into rentals. The low mortgage primary (driven down by a large down payment and then refinanced) has allowed us to build wealth and have income generating properties.

I can promise you, owning 5 properties in NOVA, 4 of which generate income is way better than owning one gigantic one.

And because we’ve had the safety net of low mortgage the career risks we’ve been able to take has paid off into much higher income than the OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:7k may be a third of their take home but taking out such a large mortgage is foolish. It means you are slave to your job and dependent on a high income to maintain your lifestyle. We make the same income and our mortgage is 3500. But we don't have mommy and daddy to bail us out.

For real. This is why we’ve never taken out a big mortgage. We’ve used our big income to drive out mortgage down. We could take career risks due to easily being able to live and save on one income when needed.

It’s a really nice feeling sitting here at age 45 getting a bit sick of working. I’m not trapped in a guilded cage. As a matter of fact my employer is trying to force be back into the office 3xs a week and I’m dug in refusing more than 1 day. I’m thinking they are welcome to fire me. We are in a Mexican stand off and I’m not backing down. Could never do this if I needed this job to pay my bills.

I understand this approach but not sure it’s best. The large mortgage can be a ball and chain, but it’s in OP’s best interest to keep working in a high paying job.

Back in the day we bought a starter home we could afford one one salary. Except both spouses continued working and earnings increased. We made less equity than if we’d bought at the top of our budget. Then we had to spend thousands selling the starter home and buying another house. We thought we were being smart financially but really it limited us.

OP is likely going to continue working and so will his or her spouse. They even have grandparents to pay for the nanny. They probably locked in a low rate and we’ll likely have confined inflation for quite some time.

OP need to buckle down the next few years and keep at it.

Well I actually have 10k in mortgages, but instead of wasting it on my primary home and an idiotic 7 bedrooms we have it spread into rentals. The low mortgage primary (driven down by a large down payment and then refinanced) has allowed us to build wealth and have income generating properties.

I can promise you, owning 5 properties in NOVA, 4 of which generate income is way better than owning one gigantic one.

And because we’ve had the safety net of low mortgage the career risks we’ve been able to take has paid off into much higher income than the OP.

Blah blah blah I am old so I got better real estate deals than you blah blah blah

[Anonymous]

The issue is not whether or not a $7k mortgage is reasonable for SOME people - of course it is. The issue is whether or not its reasonable for OP, which it clearly is not since she can't even afford childcare for her second kid with this mortgage and she's asking anonymous internet strangers for help.

[Anonymous]

There’s a lot of vitriol on this thread, and I’m suspecting most of it is jealousy towards OP. She’s only 35, bought a $2m house, and has a lot of family help. You’ll be ok OP. Early childcare years are tough but if you can get through them with no major illnesses or job losses, it’s easier on the other side.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:7k may be a third of their take home but taking out such a large mortgage is foolish. It means you are slave to your job and dependent on a high income to maintain your lifestyle. We make the same income and our mortgage is 3500. But we don't have mommy and daddy to bail us out.

For real. This is why we’ve never taken out a big mortgage. We’ve used our big income to drive out mortgage down. We could take career risks due to easily being able to live and save on one income when needed.

It’s a really nice feeling sitting here at age 45 getting a bit sick of working. I’m not trapped in a guilded cage. As a matter of fact my employer is trying to force be back into the office 3xs a week and I’m dug in refusing more than 1 day. I’m thinking they are welcome to fire me. We are in a Mexican stand off and I’m not backing down. Could never do this if I needed this job to pay my bills.

I understand this approach but not sure it’s best. The large mortgage can be a ball and chain, but it’s in OP’s best interest to keep working in a high paying job.

Back in the day we bought a starter home we could afford one one salary. Except both spouses continued working and earnings increased. We made less equity than if we’d bought at the top of our budget. Then we had to spend thousands selling the starter home and buying another house. We thought we were being smart financially but really it limited us.

OP is likely going to continue working and so will his or her spouse. They even have grandparents to pay for the nanny. They probably locked in a low rate and we’ll likely have confined inflation for quite some time.

OP need to buckle down the next few years and keep at it.

Well I actually have 10k in mortgages, but instead of wasting it on my primary home and an idiotic 7 bedrooms we have it spread into rentals. The low mortgage primary (driven down by a large down payment and then refinanced) has allowed us to build wealth and have income generating properties.

I can promise you, owning 5 properties in NOVA, 4 of which generate income is way better than owning one gigantic one.

And because we’ve had the safety net of low mortgage the career risks we’ve been able to take has paid off into much higher income than the OP.

People have different goals and priorities. I previously owned rentals and would never do so again. I’d much rather have ONE very nice home. You can’t take your money with you and I’d much prefer to enjoy living in a lovely home with my family. It sounds like you prefer the income you earn from rentals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There’s a lot of vitriol on this thread, and I’m suspecting most of it is jealousy towards OP. She’s only 35, bought a $2m house, and has a lot of family help. You’ll be ok OP. Early childcare years are tough but if you can get through them with no major illnesses or job losses, it’s easier on the other side.

+10000. It’s jealousy. I’ve learned in posts you have to hide HHI, assistance from parents etc. however it’s impossible to do that with this post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s a lot of vitriol on this thread, and I’m suspecting most of it is jealousy towards OP. She’s only 35, bought a $2m house, and has a lot of family help. You’ll be ok OP. Early childcare years are tough but if you can get through them with no major illnesses or job losses, it’s easier on the other side.

+10000. It’s jealousy. I’ve learned in posts you have to hide HHI, assistance from parents etc. however it’s impossible to do that with this post.

Was OP's post even real? Her only question was "any suggestions on improving our financial situation?" There are only two ways to do this: spend less or earn more. Doesn't sound like OP is interested in either, so what was the point of her post?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s a lot of vitriol on this thread, and I’m suspecting most of it is jealousy towards OP. She’s only 35, bought a $2m house, and has a lot of family help. You’ll be ok OP. Early childcare years are tough but if you can get through them with no major illnesses or job losses, it’s easier on the other side.

+10000. It’s jealousy. I’ve learned in posts you have to hide HHI, assistance from parents etc. however it’s impossible to do that with this post.

They’re clearly rich. Why brag ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s a lot of vitriol on this thread, and I’m suspecting most of it is jealousy towards OP. She’s only 35, bought a $2m house, and has a lot of family help. You’ll be ok OP. Early childcare years are tough but if you can get through them with no major illnesses or job losses, it’s easier on the other side.

+10000. It’s jealousy. I’ve learned in posts you have to hide HHI, assistance from parents etc. however it’s impossible to do that with this post.

I’m not jealous of OP’s inability to manage money and the fact that she’ll be tied to her job forever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s a lot of vitriol on this thread, and I’m suspecting most of it is jealousy towards OP. She’s only 35, bought a $2m house, and has a lot of family help. You’ll be ok OP. Early childcare years are tough but if you can get through them with no major illnesses or job losses, it’s easier on the other side.

Hi OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s a lot of vitriol on this thread, and I’m suspecting most of it is jealousy towards OP. She’s only 35, bought a $2m house, and has a lot of family help. You’ll be ok OP. Early childcare years are tough but if you can get through them with no major illnesses or job losses, it’s easier on the other side.

Hi OP!

Yeah it’s not me…nice try tho!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:7k may be a third of their take home but taking out such a large mortgage is foolish. It means you are slave to your job and dependent on a high income to maintain your lifestyle. We make the same income and our mortgage is 3500. But we don't have mommy and daddy to bail us out.

For real. This is why we’ve never taken out a big mortgage. We’ve used our big income to drive out mortgage down. We could take career risks due to easily being able to live and save on one income when needed.

It’s a really nice feeling sitting here at age 45 getting a bit sick of working. I’m not trapped in a guilded cage. As a matter of fact my employer is trying to force be back into the office 3xs a week and I’m dug in refusing more than 1 day. I’m thinking they are welcome to fire me. We are in a Mexican stand off and I’m not backing down. Could never do this if I needed this job to pay my bills.

I understand this approach but not sure it’s best. The large mortgage can be a ball and chain, but it’s in OP’s best interest to keep working in a high paying job.

Back in the day we bought a starter home we could afford one one salary. Except both spouses continued working and earnings increased. We made less equity than if we’d bought at the top of our budget. Then we had to spend thousands selling the starter home and buying another house. We thought we were being smart financially but really it limited us.

OP is likely going to continue working and so will his or her spouse. They even have grandparents to pay for the nanny. They probably locked in a low rate and we’ll likely have confined inflation for quite some time.

OP need to buckle down the next few years and keep at it.

Well I actually have 10k in mortgages, but instead of wasting it on my primary home and an idiotic 7 bedrooms we have it spread into rentals. The low mortgage primary (driven down by a large down payment and then refinanced) has allowed us to build wealth and have income generating properties.

I can promise you, owning 5 properties in NOVA, 4 of which generate income is way better than owning one gigantic one.

And because we’ve had the safety net of low mortgage the career risks we’ve been able to take has paid off into much higher income than the OP.

People have different goals and priorities. I previously owned rentals and would never do so again. I’d much rather have ONE very nice home. You can’t take your money with you and I’d much prefer to enjoy living in a lovely home with my family. It sounds like you prefer the income you earn from rentals.

These aren’t mutually exclusive concepts. One can live in a beautiful home and have income producing rental properties. However since my rentals are all self sustaining, I’m left with a very low primary mortgage which has enabled me to professional renovate and design every inch of my home and yard to my taste. I’d hate to live in a 7 bedroom home I could hardly afford to customize. Probably looks like a cavern with some crappy cheap Costco furniture sprinkled in. Those homes are the equivalent of strip malls. Big, ugly, and tasteless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We bought a new home last year and have a 7k/month payment for the house. We have one kid in preschool and another on the way. Our HHI is 400k and will go up to 5, maybe 6 in a few years but not immediately.

We have no other debt. About 600k in equity in the house via the down payment. 401ks combined have about 500k. We are both 35.

My concern is that there’s not tons left over after the mortgage to allocate toward the new baby once they’re born.

Grandparents will probably fund a nanny to help us out. We discussed this with them before deciding to get pregnant. Any recommendations on improving our financial situation?

Holy cow. That's a lot to pay in mortgage for your HHI. Good luck.