Sister and her husband nap every time they come over

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH naps after lunch most days. He would do this if we were visiting a sibling or very close friend and we were staying overnight or spending the entire day. But I have no interest in napping and will socialize while he does. I agree it’s a little odd, but it’s what he does. 🤷‍♀️

Why not tell him it's weird and ask him to stop it?

[Anonymous]

My brother and I usually naps after family gatherings at siblings' or my mom's, especially after meals while the women talk and the kids play. I usually do this at extended families, but not at friends' homes. We're asians btw.

[Anonymous]

If you can’t stay awake for a couple hour visit, you need to let your doctor know. Not normal.

[Anonymous]

Do they expect quiet while nap, or can you go about your business during nap time? I would just act as though they're not there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In a way it’s endearing that they feel so comfortable at the sister’s home to make themselves feel at home enough to seek out couches for napping. It sounds like they relish these naps. It’s their routine for some reason. I wouldn’t feel comfortable doing this, but they have been doing it for years according to the Op. Why is this now becoming an issue for you, Op?

Exactly this. I find this culture so weird that they’d find napping inconsiderate and unnatural. These people aren’t strangers. Let them be. I wouldnt mind it one bit if my sister or BIL napped at my house. I want them to feel at home. But that’s my culture.

I think it’s rude. You go to someone’s home to enjoy their company, to catch up - not to fall unconscious and make that person feel like they need to be quiet in their own home to make sure you can sleep soundly.

It’s her SISTER. Why are you all so freaking formal with each other even with blood relatives? I don’t get it

Is it a white people thing? It would be very common in my culture where close relatives would feel comfortable enough to nap.

Because it’s my sister I would feel the need to be quiet and not disturb her sleep. But that means I’m not able to do what I want in my own home, and that’s why it’s rude.

But of course my sister wouldn’t do this to me!

So send them both downstairs or to a guest room. Or use it as a moment to go to your own room. We’re talking about an hour or two every so often, right? At bottom, Americans look down on people who need sleep. Read these boards about spouses who sleep early. They associate sleep with laziness when really it’s just a biological need like any other.

Go to your room in your own house so your family can sleep in your living area during a short day visit? You people are BIZARRE.

[Anonymous]

Gross. Do you have to vacuum up their head hair or launder the couch coverings if their dead skin cells? There’s a reason humans use bed sheets and pillow cases.

Can’t your sister come over, have a meal, catch up, drink a coffee and drive and hour home? It’s not like they came off a red eye or have a super long day.

Do they have real jobs or always been chopping out two hours an afternoon to nap wherever they are?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess it depends on how you define napping. My BIL and SIL “nap” all the time. It just means alone time. But for your guests to just put feet up on your sofa and doze off is just very weird. Sleep apnea undiagnosed?

My brother and I both do this. A heavy sleepiness takes over me and I allow myself to doze off on the couch. I don't have sleep apnea. I know myself well enough to know that I am an introvert and find most family gatherings exhausting and I think there's some mechanism in my brain that wants to shut down after a certain amount of "intense" socialization.

Then again, I can fall asleep any non-work day if I'm not doing anything in particular in the afternoon. Power nap on the couch, or 2 hours in bed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have not read the whole thread but this would be very common in Southern European culture to take a siesta after the mid afternoon meal. This is really the norm over there.


Americans have a really high strung out workaholic culture
and unless the nappers are 60 or older most Americans would find the nap thing weird/lazy etc.

This sounds like a weekend only thing.

For a 40 or 50 yo I don’t think an hour drive, 1-2 hour lunch talk and game or hike or shop together and then an hour drive back requires a 1-2 hour nap.

They must not be getting 7-8 hours a night or eating well.

How did they do this in their 40s if they worked fulltime?

[Anonymous]

Easy fix - Change up the routine. Meet somewhere for lunch and then stroll around town. They can go home and nap after.

So they nap when you go to their house?

[Anonymous]

People are posting that they know Europeans that work two hours, take a long lunch and then nap and then work two more hours.

Hahahaha. Stop the imf payments. And they take two hour social lunches there too or play about in the hq 1 gym an hour or two a day.

[Anonymous]

Maybe your house is cozy and conducive to naps?

I think it’s weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love napping so much. And I'm an introvert. I would absolutely do this if I were visiting family.

What's so strange to me is how you've decided that something completely innocuous is weird, and you want to punish them for it. I mean, WTH?

I love napping, but I can stay awake when I am a guest in someone’s home.

Yes, but you are at a family member's home, so you are more informal. If I went to my friend's house, I would not nap...except that one very close Jewish friend (happens to be white and from NY) who feeds and feeds and feeds you enormous amounts of food and then invites you to relax on her hammock. I invariably doze off.

I would like this friend to be my friend.

Me too!

[Anonymous]

.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Gross. Do you have to vacuum up their head hair or launder the couch coverings if their dead skin cells? There’s a reason humans use bed sheets and pillow cases.

Can’t your sister come over, have a meal, catch up, drink a coffee and drive and hour home? It’s not like they came off a red eye or have a super long day.

Do they have real jobs or always been chopping out two hours an afternoon to nap wherever they are?

That's a weird comment. Why would they shed more hair if they were sitting there asleep than if they were sitting in exactly the same place, in the same clothes, and awake, talking to you? Or skin cells?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People are posting that they know Europeans that work two hours, take a long lunch and then nap and then work two more hours.

Hahahaha. Stop the imf payments. And they take two hour social lunches there too or play about in the hq 1 gym an hour or two a day.

? Was there a point here other than "I know all these cute European terms"?



Team taking over the living room to do this makes it weird and annoying. Personally I wouldn't mind if they went to a guest room or something, but no taking over the main living area for hours.