Do I need to lower my expectations ( dating)

[Anonymous]

I’m a single 27 year old woman looking for some advice. I’m dating and looking for a husband. I feel like I’m well accomplished for my age and seek a man who can bring the same to the table. I have a career I love with a decently high salary with savings, I own my own home ( a small condo), and I have no debt. I’m ideally looking for men slightly older - 30-35, because most men my age still live with roommates, don’t make enough money, and don’t seem to be ready to settle down. Must not have kids and have never been married. These are the baseline attributes I’m seeking. I’m seeking a man who makes equivalent to my salary or higher, who lives alone, and who has no debt. I haven’t been able to find a guy like this and I wonder if my expectations are too unrealistic and if I should lower them?

[Anonymous]

Lower your age requirements. Look for a guy who lives alone and is willing to make a decision on marriage within 1 year. Plus no kids, never married. Older guy pool may be too small.

Roommates shouldn't be a deal breaker. They are economically efficient.

[Anonymous]

PP. My DH makes less than me, always has. We met in college. My age group is hitting the divorce zone. There are no guarantees. Go for someone with the right personality who will be a good dad if you want kids. It's sexist to insist that your partner make equal or more money. What you want is someone who shares your values and will be a good partner. Many high-powered men have wives who are public school teachers. Would you flip that script? Why/why not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lower your age requirements. Look for a guy who lives alone and is willing to make a decision on marriage within 1 year. Plus no kids, never married. Older guy pool may be too small.

Roommates shouldn't be a deal breaker. They are economically efficient.

Agree with this. OP’s asks are all very reasonable except the living along part. Successfully living with roommates is actually a good sign of being economically efficient and able to get along with people, which are important traits in a good partner.

[Anonymous]

How long have you been working at this? How many dates have you been on?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP. My DH makes less than me, always has. We met in college. My age group is hitting the divorce zone. There are no guarantees. Go for someone with the right personality who will be a good dad if you want kids. It's sexist to insist that your partner make equal or more money. What you want is someone who shares your values and will be a good partner. Many high-powered men have wives who are public school teachers. Would you flip that script? Why/why not?

OP here. I’m an ideal world I would work PT or quit to care for my future children until they’re in school. My husband would need to make enough in this economy. Money doesn’t go that far anymore and $100k is the new middle class income. I want a nice home in a good area, private school, and the ability to find an extracurricular activities my kids would want to do. All that takes a certain level of income.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How long have you been working at this? How many dates have you been on?

OP here. I’ve been dating heavily the past 3 months. I’ve been on about 30 dates with over 10 men.

[Anonymous]

Smells like a troll, but OK

Do you have the face or body to earn that sugar daddy?
Are you Instagram fitness model caliber or nah?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP. My DH makes less than me, always has. We met in college. My age group is hitting the divorce zone. There are no guarantees. Go for someone with the right personality who will be a good dad if you want kids. It's sexist to insist that your partner make equal or more money. What you want is someone who shares your values and will be a good partner. Many high-powered men have wives who are public school teachers. Would you flip that script? Why/why not?

OP here. I’m an ideal world I would work PT or quit to care for my future children until they’re in school. My husband would need to make enough in this economy. Money doesn’t go that far anymore and $100k is the new middle class income. I want a nice home in a good area, private school, and the ability to find an extracurricular activities my kids would want to do. All that takes a certain level of income.

This is totally obtainable. No snark, but are you attractive/thin (emphasis on the thin)? This is 9/10 times a prerequisite to find the kind of man and lifestyle you’re looking for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP. My DH makes less than me, always has. We met in college. My age group is hitting the divorce zone. There are no guarantees. Go for someone with the right personality who will be a good dad if you want kids. It's sexist to insist that your partner make equal or more money. What you want is someone who shares your values and will be a good partner. Many high-powered men have wives who are public school teachers. Would you flip that script? Why/why not?

OP here. Shared values and personality traits are equally important. I was putting out the baseline of expectations that a guy would need to hit in order to go on a date or get a second date.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lower your age requirements. Look for a guy who lives alone and is willing to make a decision on marriage within 1 year. Plus no kids, never married. Older guy pool may be too small.

Roommates shouldn't be a deal breaker. They are economically efficient.

Agree with this. OP’s asks are all very reasonable except the living along part. Successfully living with roommates is actually a good sign of being economically efficient and able to get along with people, which are important traits in a good partner.

She doesn't want economically efficient. She said she wants someone rich so she can be a PTA mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP. My DH makes less than me, always has. We met in college. My age group is hitting the divorce zone. There are no guarantees. Go for someone with the right personality who will be a good dad if you want kids. It's sexist to insist that your partner make equal or more money. What you want is someone who shares your values and will be a good partner. Many high-powered men have wives who are public school teachers. Would you flip that script? Why/why not?

OP here. I’m an ideal world I would work PT or quit to care for my future children until they’re in school. My husband would need to make enough in this economy. Money doesn’t go that far anymore and $100k is the new middle class income. I want a nice home in a good area, private school, and the ability to find an extracurricular activities my kids would want to do. All that takes a certain level of income.

Are you hot or attractive?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How long have you been working at this? How many dates have you been on?

OP here. I’ve been dating heavily the past 3 months. I’ve been on about 30 dates with over 10 men.

You may just need to keep this up and give it more time. The good news is that you are young and have time.

[Anonymous]

You sound like you're vetting loan applicants, not life partners.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Smells like a troll, but OK

Do you have the face or body to earn that sugar daddy?
Are you Instagram fitness model caliber or nah?

OP here. I’m not a troll. I’m just a woman who has my stuff together and wants a man with the same.

I’m not super hot but I’m cute. Definitely girl next door type cute. I have a nice body and take care of myself. I eat well, workout 5-6 days a week, and I take care of my skin.

Im 5’2”, 118lbs, and nice curves. Dark blonde/light brown hair, dark blue eyes, and fair-skinned.