How to know if you want a 3rd baby

[Anonymous]

I'm 36 nearly 37 and need to decide asap if I want a third. I am easily talked into it, and easily talked out of it. I feel now in our circles people have 3 to prove something (wealth mainly) which annoys me. I can monetarily afford it, and I had 2 easy and healthy pregnancies. I am just wondering if I would regret it if I didn't. (For what it's worth I have 2 girls, 3&1)

[Anonymous]

I have a hard time believing anyone has a third child to “prove something,” ???? and you haven’t listed a single reason you want another.

[Anonymous]

Do what's right for your body, your mental health, your finances, your marriage, your family. Mostly in that order. Screw the rest.

[Anonymous]

If you are not committed and excited about having a third don’t do it. And your spouse needs to be committed too.

[Anonymous]

Why not - just don't do anything to prevent it? Let it happen or not happen. Trust that the outcome is what's best, meant to happen. I'm not a religious person but that's how I would rather live my life.

Have an age limit in mind (39? whatever) when you would no longer want it to happen, and take action to prevent it then.

[Anonymous]

I agree with OP. Many people I know have a third because it's a status symbol in this area

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 36 nearly 37 and need to decide asap if I want a third. I am easily talked into it, and easily talked out of it. I feel now in our circles people have 3 to prove something (wealth mainly) which annoys me. I can monetarily afford it, and I had 2 easy and healthy pregnancies. I am just wondering if I would regret it if I didn't. (For what it's worth I have 2 girls, 3&1)

What actions do people take where people walk away with this impression? Like sure wealthy people might have three children, but people say things like this and I'm like what do they roll up to pick up with a cigar hanging out of their mouth and reminisce at the bus stop in an astin martin and go on about how Wallace Tripoly IInd only came into existence so they could rub their wealth in people's faces? This is an absurd takeaway and really would love an actual example of something someone does that conveys this message rather than wealthy people simply living in a way that clearly implies they are wealthy and other people being jealous.

I am not particularly wealthy BTW but do have three kids!

[Anonymous]

If you're easily talked in/out, it doesnt sound like you are firm in your convictions. You would have a child to "prove" something to peers?

Please dont have a child and put them in that position. It doesnt sound like you actually want a 3rd child, so maybe just keep at 2 and give them all your love and attention.

[Anonymous]

If you have to ask….the answer is no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 36 nearly 37 and need to decide asap if I want a third. I am easily talked into it, and easily talked out of it. I feel now in our circles people have 3 to prove something (wealth mainly) which annoys me. I can monetarily afford it, and I had 2 easy and healthy pregnancies. I am just wondering if I would regret it if I didn't. (For what it's worth I have 2 girls, 3&1)

You clearly don't want of need one, why do it to keep up with the Jonses? Enjoy your life, focus on yourself, your marriage, your kids, your career, your parents, your friends, your hobbbies etc. Use extra time, money and energy to enrich what you have, instead of routing it for something unnecessary.

[Anonymous]

Believe me, most people have third one because it's what everyone else is having one or to save their deteriorating marriage, not because they are craving more diapers changes or sleepless nights.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Believe me, most people have third one because it's what everyone else is having one or to save their deteriorating marriage, not because they are craving more diapers changes or sleepless nights.

Hahaha this is the kind of post that says far more about the poster than people who have three kids.

[Anonymous]

Only if you are fine having three daughters.

[Anonymous]

Bringing up children is BY FAR the most important thing any of us will ever do, man or woman, and both for ourselves and our society. Unless you are taking time away from the just-about-got-it cancer cure you're working on, definitely have a child and teach them to be kind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Only if you are fine having three daughters.

Why wouldn't she?