Why are so many men suddenly approaching me?

[Anonymous]

I swear, please believe this IS NOT a humble brag, even though it sounds like one! I DO NOT appreciate this weird attention and don’t know what to do about it. I’m here because I want to know how to STOP it!

All of a sudden I’m noticing tons of unsolicited male attention, like out in public from strangers. They’ll get my attention somehow, like while I am in line at the store, places like that, and then make mundane conversation that always ends in a comment about my looks (“You have a pretty smile”, etc.) Or, a variation of cat calling, where random delivery drivers parked across the street where I am walking will wave at me.

I’m a 40yo F fwiw. I haven’t changed anything about myself or my demeanor, and in fact, most days I feel tired and exhausted and drab. Why are they singling me out? I mean, they are clearly going out of their way to get my attention. I’ve never experienced this before, or at least, not since my college years when I was young and cute!

But it’s sort of creepy? when these random men come up to me in public. I’m warring between appreciating the compliments to being annoyed they feel they have the right to comment on my body? Does this even make sense? Am
I insane?

[Anonymous]

For me a baseball cap helps a lot with creating "F Off" vibes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For me a baseball cap helps a lot with creating "F Off" vibes.

Noted. It’s funny, I actually have extreme RBF. I don’t know how I even look approachable to them!

[Anonymous]

For me it happened when my looks deteriorated. I was no longer intimidating I guess?

[Anonymous]

You must have lost weight?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For me a baseball cap helps a lot with creating "F Off" vibes.

No - a baseball cap just makes you look paranoid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For me it happened when my looks deteriorated. I was no longer intimidating I guess?

Right! This is how I feel. But it doesn’t make sense then that they’d be complimenting parts of my body and my looks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You must have lost weight?

I haven’t. I have been the same weight pretty much forever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For me it happened when my looks deteriorated. I was no longer intimidating I guess?

+1 it was disconcerting and made me worry I was someway encouraging it but seriously I'm more covered up, no make up and that gets more attention than looking nice

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For me it happened when my looks deteriorated. I was no longer intimidating I guess?

This would make sense only if men didn’t cat call and approach pretty young women, too.

[Anonymous]

Have you stopped wearing a bra? That might explain it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you stopped wearing a bra? That might explain it.

Definitely not! Like I said, nothing out of the ordinary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I swear, please believe this IS NOT a humble brag, even though it sounds like one! I DO NOT appreciate this weird attention and don’t know what to do about it. I’m here because I want to know how to STOP it!

All of a sudden I’m noticing tons of unsolicited male attention, like out in public from strangers. They’ll get my attention somehow, like while I am in line at the store, places like that, and then make mundane conversation that always ends in a comment about my looks (“You have a pretty smile”, etc.) Or, a variation of cat calling, where random delivery drivers parked across the street where I am walking will wave at me.

I’m a 40yo F fwiw. I haven’t changed anything about myself or my demeanor, and in fact, most days I feel tired and exhausted and drab. Why are they singling me out? I mean, they are clearly going out of their way to get my attention. I’ve never experienced this before, or at least, not since my college years when I was young and cute!

But it’s sort of creepy? when these random men come up to me in public. I’m warring between appreciating the compliments to being annoyed they feel they have the right to comment on my body? Does this even make sense? Am
I insane?

It’s not just you. Highs have suddenly popped up to the 60’s and spring mating season is upon us. Everywhere I go, male birds are trying to mate. Humans are not immune.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I swear, please believe this IS NOT a humble brag, even though it sounds like one! I DO NOT appreciate this weird attention and don’t know what to do about it. I’m here because I want to know how to STOP it!

All of a sudden I’m noticing tons of unsolicited male attention, like out in public from strangers. They’ll get my attention somehow, like while I am in line at the store, places like that, and then make mundane conversation that always ends in a comment about my looks (“You have a pretty smile”, etc.) Or, a variation of cat calling, where random delivery drivers parked across the street where I am walking will wave at me.

I’m a 40yo F fwiw. I haven’t changed anything about myself or my demeanor, and in fact, most days I feel tired and exhausted and drab. Why are they singling me out? I mean, they are clearly going out of their way to get my attention. I’ve never experienced this before, or at least, not since my college years when I was young and cute!

But it’s sort of creepy? when these random men come up to me in public. I’m warring between appreciating the compliments to being annoyed they feel they have the right to comment on my body? Does this even make sense? Am
I insane?

It’s not just you. Highs have suddenly popped up to the 60’s and spring mating season is upon us. Everywhere I go, male birds are trying to mate. Humans are not immune.

Humans are not birds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I swear, please believe this IS NOT a humble brag, even though it sounds like one! I DO NOT appreciate this weird attention and don’t know what to do about it. I’m here because I want to know how to STOP it!

All of a sudden I’m noticing tons of unsolicited male attention, like out in public from strangers. They’ll get my attention somehow, like while I am in line at the store, places like that, and then make mundane conversation that always ends in a comment about my looks (“You have a pretty smile”, etc.) Or, a variation of cat calling, where random delivery drivers parked across the street where I am walking will wave at me.

I’m a 40yo F fwiw. I haven’t changed anything about myself or my demeanor, and in fact, most days I feel tired and exhausted and drab. Why are they singling me out? I mean, they are clearly going out of their way to get my attention. I’ve never experienced this before, or at least, not since my college years when I was young and cute!

But it’s sort of creepy? when these random men come up to me in public. I’m warring between appreciating the compliments to being annoyed they feel they have the right to comment on my body? Does this even make sense? Am
I insane?

It’s not just you. Highs have suddenly popped up to the 60’s and spring mating season is upon us. Everywhere I go, male birds are trying to mate. Humans are not immune.

This is how it feels! But why me, and most important, how can I get them to stop and leave ME alone?