WFH and empty nest, am I crazy?
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Anonymous
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I have WFH for many years, and worked pt raising kids. My Dh has been 100% from home for the past several years. Kids are at college, and DH has no local friends or family. I do have friends locally and try to get out of the house as much as I can around my FT job to exercise or have lunch with friends.
I am going insane with dh here all the time and no one else in the house. He has narcissistic tendencies as it is and he feels that my entire life needs to revolve around him, and that I should be his entire life as well. I think this is unhealthy. He is driving me nuts. He expects me to be at his beck and call. Frankly I’m sick of him being around all the time. It’s little things like him telling me he’s going to shower. I do not care. Or he’s going for a walk. I do not care. Why does he need to announce his every movement to me? Let’s have some mystery in our lives! He doesn’t do anything around the house, doesn’t leave the house for days, and isn’t particularly engaged in his job. Am I just a b**** like he thinks I am or is this a really a unhealthy situation? |
Anonymous
| What you describe is not narcissism. Do you have better examples? |
Anonymous
| I feel the same way. My husband is always home. Always. We have nothing to talk about. He wants me to be his only social outlet, but I don’t enjoy spending time with him, at all. I don’t want to go on a walk, I don’t want to sit silently at lunch together, I don’t want to go on a trip together. |
Anonymous
| I don't know but since the pandemic, my DH has been the same. We both work from home though we still have kids at home. Sometimes it feels like my husband follows me around the house - if I decide to clean out a closet, he comes to help or talk to me or play with a kid right where I am trying to work. I get that some people may think that is nice but we have been talking - mostly only - to each other now for years. I don't care - unless you have something new and interesting to say, just let me clean my closet in peace. |
Anonymous
| He's your coworker. They tell you a lot of boring stuff you don't care about and they hang around you too much. Get used to it. |
Anonymous
I’m leaving out some details, in case he should ever stumble upon this. |
Anonymous
Ok then from those two examples, you sound like a B. |
Anonymous
This is OP and this is it 100%. |
Anonymous
If you don't enjoy spending time with him at all, you have deep issues. Since you are empty nesters maybe divorce is a good option. |
Anonymous
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My DH and I always tell each other when we are going out for a walk, or showering. It’s just a quick comment, not a long conversation. Thsts not a good example of narcissism - it’s just giving the other a heads-up in case they are looking for us, or need the shower themselves, etc.
I never think to myself “I don’t care” - I barely notice it so obviously you have disdain for him in general. |
Anonymous
Why doesn't he have friends, OP? |
Anonymous
He would be the first to describe himself as I did. Gonna have to trust me on it. I think it’s the fact that everything I do has to be about him, and I always have to be happy and supporting him in some way. When the college kids are home, he gets upset because I spend more time with them than him, etc. |
Anonymous
| I think you both sound like miserable people |
Anonymous
+1 His is it a poor reflection on him that he wants to connect with you in benign ways like eat with you, take a walk with you, etc, but you find him insufferable? You do not want to bd married to the guy. THAT should be your complaint, not that he wants to sit across from you. You don’t have to stay married! |
Anonymous
| Meant - HOW is it a poor reflection on him ^^ |