I’m being cheated on again

[Anonymous]

I’m in my 50s, hes in his 60s.

When does this ever end?

[Anonymous]

Sorry OP.

Late 30s/early 40s here and I wish I had a solid answer. One with Hope.

Caught my current boyfriend in a situation a few days ago. Probably getting played and it sucks because I really like this one. Dating is a wild ride and sometimes getting off for a break is needed.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Gross!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m in my 50s, hes in his 60s.

When does this ever end?

When you put your foot down, put yourself first (get therapy if you don’t have one already) and end it.

[Anonymous]

Wow, I’m so sorry, OP. How do you know he’s cheating?

I haven’t dealt with cheating in any of my relationships but have always felt like cheating was about way more than sex. Why would he betray your trust multiple times?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m in my 50s, hes in his 60s.

When does this ever end?

When you put your foot down, put yourself first (get therapy if you don’t have one already) and end it.

Pretty sure she has the exclusivity talk at the start of relationships. Not like she doesn’t set expectations.

[Anonymous]

AHHHHHH. I'm gonna go crazy! Why do we keep blaming women for the behaviors of their spouses - including cheating!!!!!

Men are adults who make their own choices. They're not cheating because we wives didn't tell them sternly enough. They're not cheating because we gave them some reason to betray us.

They're cheating because they want to sleep with other women and know if they tell their wives, they risk divorce and all that entails (loss of sex with the wife, loss of financial status and control, loss of family, loss of standing in the community, etc.)

It's really that simple.

Not all people cheat. But, if you are with someone that cheats, the only way to make sure that person doesn't cheat on you again is to end the relationship.

OP, I'm sorry you're with a person who still cheats. You didn't cause them to cheat. You can't stop them.

[Anonymous]

I’d break up or establish an open relationship so that you can find fulfillment too.

It’s a pattern. It will never end. He might stop for a few years, but seems like he’s not capable/interested in monogamy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:AHHHHHH. I'm gonna go crazy! Why do we keep blaming women for the behaviors of their spouses - including cheating!!!!!

Men are adults who make their own choices. They're not cheating because we wives didn't tell them sternly enough. They're not cheating because we gave them some reason to betray us.

They're cheating because they want to sleep with other women and know if they tell their wives, they risk divorce and all that entails (loss of sex with the wife, loss of financial status and control, loss of family, loss of standing in the community, etc.)

It's really that simple.

Not all people cheat. But, if you are with someone that cheats, the only way to make sure that person doesn't cheat on you again is to end the relationship.

OP, I'm sorry you're with a person who still cheats. You didn't cause them to cheat. You can't stop them.

I don't think anyone is blaming OP for the cheating. However, she does have her role in this. He's cheated before and she stayed. Its not that shocking he cheated again. And OP is here whining about when will it end. It probably won't because he knows that he can do it with zero consequences

[Anonymous]

How exactly do we know she’s being cheated on by the same man? We don’t. Stop making assumptions, PP.

[Anonymous]

Man men cheat as a form of escapism. They can’t deal with conflict (which is a natural part of a relationship) and cheat to get a high form someone else. They need to be seen in a positive light, bc they can’t bear to face the disappointment from their partner. Cheating can be complicated and yes, not just about sex. But it is NEVER the betrayed partner’s fault. The cheater made an active choice to cheat. They could have left first.

[Anonymous]

Time for you to end the relationship. He will never change. It’s time for you to move on. Be strong. You got this!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AHHHHHH. I'm gonna go crazy! Why do we keep blaming women for the behaviors of their spouses - including cheating!!!!!

Men are adults who make their own choices. They're not cheating because we wives didn't tell them sternly enough. They're not cheating because we gave them some reason to betray us.

They're cheating because they want to sleep with other women and know if they tell their wives, they risk divorce and all that entails (loss of sex with the wife, loss of financial status and control, loss of family, loss of standing in the community, etc.)

It's really that simple.

Not all people cheat. But, if you are with someone that cheats, the only way to make sure that person doesn't cheat on you again is to end the relationship.

OP, I'm sorry you're with a person who still cheats. You didn't cause them to cheat. You can't stop them.

I don't think anyone is blaming OP for the cheating. However, she does have her role in this. He's cheated before and she stayed. Its not that shocking he cheated again. And OP is here whining about when will it end. It probably won't because he knows that he can do it with zero consequences

OP here. I got divorced from my ex after he cheated on me for years and finally left me for someone else. I’ve been seeing this man and we are supposedly exclusive and he supposedly loves me. Today I feel so defeated I want to disappear. This one really, really hurts. It really hurts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, I’m so sorry, OP. How do you know he’s cheating?

I haven’t dealt with cheating in any of my relationships but have always felt like cheating was about way more than sex. Why would he betray your trust multiple times?

Because he’s effed up, obviously. Not OP’s issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AHHHHHH. I'm gonna go crazy! Why do we keep blaming women for the behaviors of their spouses - including cheating!!!!!

Men are adults who make their own choices. They're not cheating because we wives didn't tell them sternly enough. They're not cheating because we gave them some reason to betray us.

They're cheating because they want to sleep with other women and know if they tell their wives, they risk divorce and all that entails (loss of sex with the wife, loss of financial status and control, loss of family, loss of standing in the community, etc.)

It's really that simple.

Not all people cheat. But, if you are with someone that cheats, the only way to make sure that person doesn't cheat on you again is to end the relationship.

OP, I'm sorry you're with a person who still cheats. You didn't cause them to cheat. You can't stop them.

I don't think anyone is blaming OP for the cheating. However, she does have her role in this. He's cheated before and she stayed. Its not that shocking he cheated again. And OP is here whining about when will it end. It probably won't because he knows that he can do it with zero consequences

OP here. I got divorced from my ex after he cheated on me for years and finally left me for someone else. I’ve been seeing this man and we are supposedly exclusive and he supposedly loves me. Today I feel so defeated I want to disappear. This one really, really hurts. It really hurts.

I’m so sorry. I truly think I’ll never date again myself.