Do your teen sons talk to you about their crushes or girlfriends?

[Anonymous]

My son is a freshman and it is really hard to get him to communicate about girls. I guess this is common but he is now talking to a girl and I only know about it because one of his friends brought her up in the car on two separate occasions.

How do you navigate talking to them that won’t have them clam up immediately?

Oh and I am not one of those you can’t date or this girl doesn’t deserve my son type of moms, and he knows this.

I am just hoping he is treating her right, being respectful, going slow etc….

[Anonymous]

You can emphasize being respectful to the opposite sex without him opening up. Hopefully you’ve been doing this already. Treating people right, not being pushy…

[Anonymous]

No, he will not talk about it with you. This is normal behavior for a teen. Back off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, he will not talk about it with you. This is normal behavior for a teen. Back off.

+1 These posts lately are making me nostalgic for my 90s upbringing when parents had no clue what their kids were thinking or doing.

[Anonymous]

Yep. I listen and give him advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, he will not talk about it with you. This is normal behavior for a teen. Back off.

+1 These posts lately are making me nostalgic for my 90s upbringing when parents had no clue what their kids were thinking or doing.

I hear you. My kids are very open and tell me lots of stuff, and I’m always thinking “I don’t want to know! Tell your friends - that’s what they’re for!!”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son is a freshman and it is really hard to get him to communicate about girls. I guess this is common but he is now talking to a girl and I only know about it because one of his friends brought her up in the car on two separate occasions.

How do you navigate talking to them that won’t have them clam up immediately?

Oh and I am not one of those you can’t date or this girl doesn’t deserve my son type of moms, and he knows this.

I am just hoping he is treating her right, being respectful, going slow etc….

Dear op,
Is your a son in high school or college? Just hope that the messages you gave him long before sunk in. Does your son have a man in his life? Perhaps that might be better but, if you are married to a man if he just talked and didn't back up his actions than not sure what you can do

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, he will not talk about it with you. This is normal behavior for a teen. Back off.

The OP didn’t say she asked anything.

I am very curious. If you heard your teen daughter was dating someone thru her friend mentioning it, would you back off?

My parents in the 80/90’s sure didn’t and neither do I.

So we are being sexist thinking boys need no advice and can do whatever they want and we only protect the girls? I thought this was 2023

[Anonymous]

Mine never used to, but has talked about his one current girlfriend and she has been over our house a few times. That’s when you know they really like the girl. That’s when you know they have a good one. It’s actually really sweet to see him being so thoughtful and kind, because most of the time he is driving me crazy!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, he will not talk about it with you. This is normal behavior for a teen. Back off.

The OP didn’t say she asked anything.

I am very curious. If you heard your teen daughter was dating someone thru her friend mentioning it, would you back off?

My parents in the 80/90’s sure didn’t and neither do I.

So we are being sexist thinking boys need no advice and can do whatever they want and we only protect the girls? I thought this was 2023

Of course not. Boys need to be interrogated to ensure they are not predators. Girls need to be interrogated to confirm they are victims.

It is indeed 2023.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, he will not talk about it with you. This is normal behavior for a teen. Back off.

+1 These posts lately are making me nostalgic for my 90s upbringing when parents had no clue what their kids were thinking or doing.

I'll see your 90s upbringing and throw in my 80s upbringing.

What is it with these mothers who have to know their sons' every thought on dating/girls/sexuality? Talk to them about how to treat girls all along, talk to them about sex and protection from a young age, but stop with trying to get into their heads to parse out every little thing. This is a good way to get them to stop talking to you at all. Boundaries, people!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, he will not talk about it with you. This is normal behavior for a teen. Back off.

+1 These posts lately are making me nostalgic for my 90s upbringing when parents had no clue what their kids were thinking or doing.

I'll see your 90s upbringing and throw in my 80s upbringing.

What is it with these mothers who have to know their sons' every thought on dating/girls/sexuality? Talk to them about how to treat girls all along, talk to them about sex and protection from a young age, but stop with trying to get into their heads to parse out every little thing. This is a good way to get them to stop talking to you at all. Boundaries, people!

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, he will not talk about it with you. This is normal behavior for a teen. Back off.

+1 These posts lately are making me nostalgic for my 90s upbringing when parents had no clue what their kids were thinking or doing.

Umm we didn’t have phones, social media, unlimited access to porn for “learning” about sex, date rape drugs, tons of candy pills, me too movement, etc… A lot more STD’s too.

To want to be so hands off with who your son is hanging out with during his free time and what he is doing is pretty scary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, he will not talk about it with you. This is normal behavior for a teen. Back off.

+1 These posts lately are making me nostalgic for my 90s upbringing when parents had no clue what their kids were thinking or doing.

I'll see your 90s upbringing and throw in my 80s upbringing.

What is it with these mothers who have to know their sons' every thought on dating/girls/sexuality? Talk to them about how to treat girls all along, talk to them about sex and protection from a young age, but stop with trying to get into their heads to parse out every little thing. This is a good way to get them to stop talking to you at all. Boundaries, people!

+1

Same! 80s girl too. None of my parents' business. For my kids: I'm here if they need me; I am not going to pry.

[Anonymous]

Kids are having less and safer sex than ever.

Be there but don’t push.