When do clothing issues become neglect?

[Anonymous]

My 8 year old REFUSES to dress properly for winter. For a long time, I was of the thought that he would be put on jeans and a sweatshirt when he got cold, but another autumn has rolled around, and he's outside in 40-degree weather in a t-shirt and jeans waiting on the bus. At what point do I need to put my foot down? My mom keeps telling me child services is close to getting involved.

[Anonymous]

Have you left med around at bus stops and schools in the winter? You never see coats. My kid wore shorts all year round from the point in time where he had an opinion on clothes. He only wears pants now because of the type of work he does. I’m not saying it’s fine. But I can guarantee that there are not enough social workers in your entire state to handle all of the kids in a single school who don’t dress for the weather.

[Anonymous]

What?? No. CPS doesn’t get involved for kids without a coat on.


Put it in his backpack if it makes you feel better - then everyone will know he has one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What?? No. CPS doesn’t get involved for kids without a coat on.


Put it in his backpack if it makes you feel better - then everyone will know he has one.

I've tried! He takes it right out if he notices before he leaves. I don't want it to become a battle of wills.

[Anonymous]

I make my kids carry the clothing appropriate for the weather. If they choose not to wear it, fine. If they DO use it, I never say a word about it.

[Anonymous]

Will he wear hoodies? Bc that's all my boys will wear. Tshirt, shorts, pants, hoodies. Some combination of those four items everyday.
Never a coat.

[Anonymous]

Lol to your mom.

40F isn't *that* cold. You're nowhere near neglect - and nowhere near needing to put your foot down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What?? No. CPS doesn’t get involved for kids without a coat on.


Put it in his backpack if it makes you feel better - then everyone will know he has one.

I've tried! He takes it right out if he notices before he leaves. I don't want it to become a battle of wills.

Okay. Then just leave it. I work with CPS professionally and they will never get involved for this. I have a hard time getting them to investigate when a twelve year old girl turns up pregnant - they aren’t going to do a thing about winter coats.

[Anonymous]

Yes give him a hoodie. Or leave a hoodie at school. They might have better luck having him get it on at recess.

No child protective services won't be called.

[Anonymous]

This is incredibly common, OP. Annoying, but common. I feel you.

[Anonymous]

He will learn on his own. Some kids run hot.

[Anonymous]

My first grader is refusing pants. I have bought pants, I explain the weather, and then I drop the rope. He was cold on the way to school today. It's gonna be 80 later this week. Next week looks chillier! I think once he's cold enough he'll put on the pants.

It's not worth the fight to me. He has a sensory issue around the way the pants fit and he just hates them. So ok then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I make my kids carry the clothing appropriate for the weather. If they choose not to wear it, fine. If they DO use it, I never say a word about it.

Our approach too, but even if they refuse to carry it, there's no way you'll get in trouble. Anyone who knows anything about children know that they often make different clothing choices than their parents would prefer.

[Anonymous]

He MUST carry something in the back pack. I lost the battle on pants at that age. but leaving a hoodie in your back pack is not an inconvenience. Also, no one is going to call cps. I have one child that only wears tshirts and shorts and the other is pants and long sleeves. both are year round and its really messing with my hand me down situation

[Anonymous]

Just want to say that he might not learn. My dh was outside all weekend in shorts and a shirt. He runs hot, especially his legs. I think it's pretty normal for people with high metabolisms like teen boys.